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Planet Uranium - A beginners guide to the uranium market in the 2020's Chapters 1-6

Planet Uranium - A beginners guide to the uranium market in the 2020's Chapters 1-6

https://preview.redd.it/f0g6dlsqiwf61.png?width=1600&format=png&auto=webp&s=7a84d539f52e8dd8735eac1e3780df59868fd8b6
Dear community, I am the author of the following book which I have posted in its entirety for redditors on this channel.
I like to research my investments thoroughly, so the following is my thesis that this is a 'when, not if scenario'.
As not many seem to want to buy it on Amazon, I am making it available to read in posts below. Enjoy!
Due to reddit post size limits, it is in different posts starting on this post with Chapters 1-6
Link to Chapters 7-8
https://www.reddit.com/UraniumSqueeze/comments/le4myw/planet_uranium_a_beginners_guide_to_the_uranium/
Link to Chapters 9-11
https://www.reddit.com/UraniumSqueeze/comments/le4vku/planet_uranium_a_beginners_guide_to_the_uranium/
Link to Chapters 12-16
https://www.reddit.com/UraniumSqueeze/comments/le50o1/planet_uranium_a_beginners_guide_to_the_uranium/

If you click on the below link, I am hoping it will move my ebook up the amazon search ranks so non redditors can see it. Thanks.
https://www.amazon.com/Planet-Uranium-Beginners-Guide-Market-ebook/dp/B07TCHF7T7/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_pdt_img_top?ie=UTF8

Planet Uranium A Beginners Guide to the Uranium Market in the 2020’s
Copyright © 2019 by Andre Pearce
All rights reserved.

Table of contents
Introduction
Chapter 1 The power unleashed - A lightbulb moment
Chapter 2 The Millers - How to make Yellowcake
Chapter 3 The miners - To dig or to leach, that is the question
Chapter 4 The converters - How to make uranium gas
Chapter 5 The spinners - How to enrich uranium
Chapter 6 The French - What do cheese and uranium not share in common?
Chapter 7 The guardians of the prices - Contracts, spot, and futures
Chapter 8 The promises of a miner - How dreams differ from reality
Chapter 9 The Japanese - How it can really go sideways
Chapter 10 Underfeeding - ‘why don’t you explain this to me like I’m five’
Chapter 11 Moving parts - The art of thoughtful disagreement
Chapter 12 How to play this - From toe dipping to diving in head first
Chapter 13 Section 232 - A possible US fork
Chapter 14 Wall Street - How they plan every step to prey on you in this market
Chapter 15 Small Modular Reactors - Why less could be more
Chapter 16 Going forward - The learning curve

“When the market wants into gold stocks it’s like trying to force the contents of the Hoover Dam into a hose, in the case of uranium stocks, it’s more like a soda straw. it’s a very small market.” - Doug Casey

Introduction
In this book, I explain the fundamentals of the uranium market. Humans are not computers that process bits of data. Processing information is only part of what we do, and it is a lot easier if the information is presented in an interesting and engaging manner.
This book has been deliberately written to move from subject to subject without going so deeply into an area to the point where the reader is bored and loses interest in the details. We have all had teachers who were both, boring or engaging, and we know the difference well. So while the information contained in this book is accurate to the best of my knowledge, it is also designed to keep the reader engaged.
This book informs and educates readers on the uranium market and whether a retail investor should get involved. I have mined through a large amount of data and information in order to find the most relevant, and present it logically. This could form a foundation of information that might lead the reader to explore certain topics in more detail and assist them in their decision making. This book includes a background on the uranium players and the different parties involved in using this interesting element. These include explorers, miners, developers, processors through to the investors and pundits. It also includes a macro view of where uranium is being used currently and going forward into the future. I also present the arguments both for and against investing in uranium, in order to equip the readers with both sides of the argument.
Finally, a disclaimer on investment/speculation advice. No part of any information herein is financial advice, neither is it a suggestion or anything else that can be considered advice to invest in any particular company or adopt a particular strategy. The views expressed herein are of the author and no other person and are for educational purposes only. One needs to make their own decisions based on the best information available to them. Enjoy the read.
Chapter 1 The power unleashed - A lightbulb moment
So it’s all about electricity. Imagine for a moment that you run an electricity generating plant. Most power stations want to generate steam to push turbines that generate electricity. To generate steam, you need heat, and for heat, humans typically burn things - coal, gas, oil and the like. Uranium can turn turbines too, we’ll discuss how this happens later. According to the World Nuclear Association, globally 26,672 TWh of electricity was generated in 2018. 2,724 Twh of that was generated by nuclear power. That's around 10% of the world’s electricity.
So let’s visit our imaginary power plant where we have a single 100-Watt light bulb which we want to light up. We would like to see how long the bulb would stay lit with a kilogram of three materials, - coal, oil, and uranium. So you burn your kilo of coal and it turns the turbine and the 100W bulb comes on and it will stay on for around 80 hours, that's around 3 days. Not bad. Next, you burn a kilogram of oil and it turns the turbine and bulb comes on and it will stay on for 5 days. Better than coal, right?. So finally we come to the kilo of uranium which we won’t burn/combust - the proper term is fission. Anyway the turbine kicks on and the light bulb switches on. And we wait, not 5 days, not 5 months, not 5 years, not even 5 centuries, but 27,397 years. At that point in time, the light bulb will go off, of course, you may need to replace the bulb a few times during that period.
Now just to reinforce the point, let’s order the equivalent of what a kilogram of uranium can do for a 100-Watt bulb in coal and oil. So first the trucks of coal arrive, the delivery company has decided to send the shipment using a fairly standard 25-tonne ten-wheeler truck. This will take a while as you’ve had to order 14,000 kgs. After standing in the yard watching 560 trucks drive by and unload and you’re starting to wonder if you have a hint of black lung and why you have a kind of gritty taste in your mouth. Next, we want to get our hands on oil, again the equivalent of a kilogram of uranium. We’re gonna need some kind of tank to store it on site. You order 10,000 kg which is around 9,200 liters so one truck should do it to fill the tank you have on site.
Some of the numbers for the above example were taken from the European Nuclear Society website if you want to have a look at that as it runs the numbers in a few other ways too. There are a few issues with the comparison. First, it assumes that combustion or fission of materials is 100% efficient, that is to say, all the energy from them is changed to electricity. The reality due to the law of thermodynamics is that energy losses come about through heat and other losses thus reducing how long the light bulb will stay on for.
Another issue with the comparison is that nowadays you can't exactly take a pick and shovel and dig up a kilogram of coal, put it in a bucket and take it your power plant for the 3 days of light. Oil is no longer available on the surface to be scooped up with a jug. Once you have extracted it, usually from deep below ground it needs to be refined. Uranium, however, is by far the most complicated of the three when it comes to getting it to a state where it can be used at the power plant. The reason for this is because it starts its journey to the power plant as a bunch of rocks and needs to be transformed into a product that can be used in the power plant.
Leaving aside the losses mentioned and refining required, our imaginary power plant / light bulb experiment does, however, illustrate the amazing and almost incomparable energy in a kilogram of uranium in relation to oil and coal. If I wanted to reduce mining footprints and transport costs I know which one I would pick (excuse the pun).
So it’s time to leave our imaginary power plant and visit a real nuclear power plant. By the way I did say earlier that it’s all about electricity, saying that, there are also nuclear applications to the medical field which are pretty small in size, and of course military applications which involve blowing things up with some rather unpleasant consequences (think mushrooms), and also running machinery (mostly military). The military applications have had an impact on uranium markets historically and we can get into that later too.
Just in case you were wondering about the coal and oil side of things, according to the World Coal Association, 38% of electricity is generated by coal (I think they have thrown peat in there too as part of that number). It also shows oil as generating 4% of global supply and gas 23%. In that context, nuclear is holding its own at 10% of electricity generation.
Chapter 2 The Millers - How to make Yellowcake
The trouble with uranium used in a power plant is that it doesn’t just come in one-kilogram blocks. It’s probably most popularly recognized in 55-gallon barrels and is called yellowcake (or urania). The barrels typically weigh around 400 kgs and getting to Yelowcake stage is only one of a number of stages to get the uranium ready for the power plant. There are a few ways to get a barrel of yellowcake.
Orano is a large player in the uranium industry and I like their description for its simplicity: “Start with high-grade uranium ore that has already been crushed. Leach it, oxidize it and decant it before clarifying it. Add solvents, then precipitate this mixture. The result is a yellow solution called yellowcake. Put it in an 800°C oven and bake until it is a grey powder with a uranium content of 85%. Carefully place in drums before sending it to the conversion plant of your choice”
Now there may be a few terms that we need to explain here; ore, grade, and solvents. Ore is basically rock or soil that contains uranium. High grade means that there is uranium present in the ore at percentages above 2% or 20,000 parts per million (ppm). Typically in most soils, rocks, and water, uranium is present, but in levels below 5 ppm. So >2% is high and the mines with the highest grade get up close to 20%. The third term we want to understand here is solvents. Solvents are chemicals that can dissolve stuff, you may have baking soda in your kitchen, and that could be just the trick for the correct ore. The rest of the technical terms above probably refer to processes that are required to make Yellowcake and will get a chemical engineer excited but we can pass on getting too deeply into that.
Making Yellowcake is not difficult. If you want to see people doing this for fun you can go on YouTube and you will come across people ‘brewing’ homemade concoctions. Here is an example ‘recipe’ of what’s out there: Get a bunch of rocks with uranium in them, crush it up into a powder and pour some hydrochloric acid on to them. From that, you will get a dark green liquid although that color is ore dependent. Then in different stages and varying amounts you add hypochlorite, ammonium hydroxide, and ammonia. At this point, a vacuum filtration system is required to separate the sludge (the good stuff) from the rest of the potion. The sludge is then mixed with a carbonate leach solution. This goes back into the vacuum filter. This time it’s not the sludge that is required but rather the transparent green liquid. Add to this hydrochloric acid and maybe some sodium carbonate or bicarbonate to control pH levels. Heat that and add hydrogen peroxide. Filtration follows and then it is dried out and hey presto you have Yellowcake.
Again if you can do this on YouTube it’s not rocket science, although YouTube does have videos on rocket science too. While there are more complicated ‘baking recipes’ out there and while it is relatively simple, it can take time, and during the whole process pH levels need to be controlled. Other processes and chemicals may or may not be involved depending on the ore body. Making Yellowcake may also sound very unhealthy, but donning a pair of gloves and making an effort not to eat or snort any of it should suffice to the point where you should survive just fine, or at least to the point where one could post a video online of one's achievements.
It’s worth mentioning that Yellowcake these days is not actually yellow. The ‘yellow’ was from earlier operations which had more impurities. These days it’s a ‘blackcake’ or ‘browncake’, which I’m sure you would agree doesn’t sound half as nice as Yellowcake. The chemical name for the black/brown cake called Yellowcake is called uranium oxide, around 20% of this is various compounds that we’re not too interested in, but 80% is the good stuff, and goes by the name triuranium octoxide or more popularly U3O8 . From this point forward, I will refer to this as U3O8.
Chapter 3 The miners - To dig or to leach, that is the question
While we may imagine men and machines above or below ground digging up rocks and sending it to the mill for processing into Yellowcake there is also another way to get the uranium out of the ground. Earlier we mentioned crushing rocks and adding a leachate such as hydrochloric acid or even baking soda which can be used in some places, but this can be done both underground and above ground too.
For the above ground technique, you dig out your rocks from below ground or from an open pit, dump it somewhere convenient and then pour some form of solvent on it to percolate through the rocks. Think networks of pipes on a pile of rocks that you are trying to irrigate, but not to grow flowers. To prevent the groundwater below becoming contaminated some kind of barrier or layer needs to be installed between your rocks and the existing ground. This layer can be installed much the same way as a very large plastic tray placed at a slight angle would do the trick and allow you to siphon off the liquid which is uranium-rich leachate, that is the material which you can now make Yellowcake from. Plastic trays don’t usually come in the sizes required for this type of operation so the liner at the bottom is usually a layer of soil high in the right type of clay which doesn’t allow leakage to the ground below to prevent contamination to the groundwater below.
This technique can also be employed underground but in this instance, a large plastic tray below the area you are working is not so easy. Instead, you drill down to the underground zone you are interested in, pump your leachate chemicals down there and then somewhere between your various injection wells, you start drawing up the uranium-rich leachate material to the surface to also make Yellowcake from it.
The underground method which is called various things such as in-situ recovery or in-situ leaching, maybe more complicated by the fact that there is a local aquifer in the area. An aquifer is a permeable layer of rock, soil or sediment that contains water. Put simply - its an underground body of water, and people and animals drink from them so it’s not a good look to contaminate them with lots of uranium or baking soda for that matter.
With mining there always seems to be a catch, big holes in the ground which don’t look too good or underground pollution with a small surface footprint, it would seem nothing is simple or easy, and obviously, there are both advantages and disadvantages in terms of cost and environmental impact amongst other factors. In case you are still imagining people in mines, presently (2019) for the US there are zero operating underground mines and there are zero operating open pit mines, but there are six in-situ leaching facilities in operation. Consider that in the context of a country that generates 19% of its electricity by using uranium. It also indicates when times get tough with regard to uranium prices, leaching facilities seems to be the way to go during a downturn and must do even better during an upturn.
According to the World Nuclear Association, over two-thirds of uranium mining is done in only three countries - Kazakhstan, Canada, and Australia. It is likely the last two countries are more familiar to you but Kazakhstan not so much. To give you an idea of where it is - if you were in China and were heading north towards Mongolia but took a left, you’d probably end up there.
Chapter 4 The converters - How to make uranium gas
So we have mined it, we have milled it - that is turned it into Yellowcake and it’s still not ready for generating electricity so next, we need to do some conversion. Broadly speaking this is the third step in the process. With regard to this step, in the US, we don’t have many options, according to the US Nuclear Regulatory Commission there is only one plant in the country in the state of Illinois. U3O8/Yellowcake goes through the gate and uranium hexafluoride (UF6 ) comes out. (Again from here on in, this will be written as UF6).
According to the processors in Illinois, the process they use involves five stages: sizing, reduction, hydrofluorination, fluorination, and distillation. Without going into too many details of these stages whatever it is that they do, the product comes out at 99.99% purified liquid which, at that kind of purity, it sounds like they know what they are doing. After cooling for five days it crystallizes to a white substance which apparently looks like rock salt.
This process is called the dry fluoride process. Globally speaking, the most popular method is called the wet method. Typically more chemicals are added to the Yellowcake and eventually we end up with hexafluoride (UF6), it takes two separate facilities to use this method which sounds more cumbersome than the dry method used in Illinois.
This crystalline ‘dodgy looking rock salt’ remains in that state until it hits a temperature of around fifty to sixty degrees Celsius at which point it becomes a gas and that is what we need for the next stage - uranium enrichment. Although per kilogram, uranium yields way more energy than coal, we are starting to get an insight into how complicated it is versus shoveling coal into a furnace to make electricity.
There are only five countries that convert uranium commercially, the US, Russia, Canada, France, and China. We say commercially because there are other nations out there that have their own uranium conversion capacity.
Chapter 5 The spinners - How to enrich uranium
At this stage, we are down to two components U235 and U238 . (Yet again I’m going to change these to upper case). U238 makes up 99.3% and U235 0.7%. The two are chemically identical, they also both have 93 protons but U235 has 143 neutrons and U238 has 146 neutrons. The three neutron variation makes a whole world of difference. The reason this stage is called enrichment is that the 0.7% U235 needs to be higher for generating electricity - typically at 3-5% levels. If we kept enriching it to say above 80%, then we are into bomb making territory. So how do we get our U235 from 0.7% to say 3.5%?
There are a few methods but currently the most popular is the centrifuge. Earlier we said above 50 - 60 degrees Celsius, UF6 turns into gas. So we spin the gas and by doing so we can separate the U235 from the U238. Imagine being on a playground roundabout and spinning really fast. The faster you go the more chance that you fall off. The fall entails being forced to the outer edge and then being thrown off. This is called centrifugal force. If you are near the center of the roundabout the force doesn’t have as powerful an effect. The U238 is heavier and during the fun times spinning in the centrifuge, gets thrown more quickly to the outside than its lighter brother U235.
So how fast do the centrifuges spin? Well, a washing machine at the end of its cycle does a final spin at around 700 - 1500 revolutions per minute (RPM), a new Lamborghini engine does around 8,000 RPM and a jet engine can get up to 25,000. But a centrifuge gets up to 90,000 RPM. That is equivalent to 1500 revolutions a second. It spins in a vacuum to reduce friction with a magnetic bearing on the top and only one point of contact with a needlelike bearing at the bottom.
Adding heat to the bottom of the centrifuge makes the lighter U235 migrate to the top and can then be scooped away. Within a centrifuge, there can be a temperature differential of 300 degrees.
There is only one enrichment plant in the US today and it is located in New Mexico. It’s noteworthy that a country which relies on uranium for 19% of its electricity has only one conversion plant as mentioned earlier, and also, only one enrichment plant in the country. That might explain why 93% of the uranium delivered to the reactors (power plants) in the US come from abroad.
Next, our uranium needs to go to a fuel fabrication plant.
At this point, we have mined it, milled it into Yellowcake (U3O8), converted it into UF6 and spun it into an enriched 3-5% U235. Now we take the enriched UF6 to a plant that turns it into pellets for the power plant. Here it is turned into uranium dioxide powder and the powder is compacted into pellets. This is used in rods in the power plant to generate heat for the turbines to make electricity.
So this brings us back to where we started - the nuclear plant with our enriched uranium, finally we are ready to generate some heat to turn some turbines to generate electricity. As we have seen so far, it takes several processes to make uranium user ready and is costly in terms of energy, especially when spinning it at high speeds.
Chapter 6 The French - What do cheese and uranium not share in common?
Historically France is known for making a lot of cheese and wine. It is also known for making a lot of electricity by means of nuclear power plants. Around 75% of its electricity comes from nuclear power. After the US it has the most nuclear reactors with 58. Based on our earlier discussion involving the processes in making uranium ‘reactor ready’, you may think uranium generated electricity is costly. However, according to the IEA, 2016 residential electricity in France cost around $180/Mwh. Comparing that to its neighbors the UK at $200, Italy $275 and Germany $325, France is the cheapest of its big neighbors and obviously, that is directly related to the way it generates electricity. Those figures probably also explain why France is the largest net exporter of electricity in the world and makes a cool 3 billion euros a year from it.
So how did France pull off this achievement? Apparently, there was an oil crisis in 1973 due to OPEC having an oil embargo against countries that were considered to be supporting Israel in the Yom-Kippur war. Prices of oil went from $3 to $12. Imagine if oil, which is around, say $70 today went to $280, you can understand why they called it a crisis. Anyway, out of crisis comes opportunity and France decided to build nuclear plants to avoid a repeat situation in the future.
Standardization
Apparently, Charles De Gaulle once asked: “How can anyone govern a nation that has 246 kinds of cheese?”. On the other hand, the government-owned ‘Electric Utility Company’ (EDF) has a history of standardization. Standardization is when you copy and paste as much stuff as possible - think Ikea furniture. It looks good, but it’s the same stuff in flat pack over and over again - easy to manufacture and ship, cheap to buy. In comparison, if you go to a joiner and ask him to make you a piece of bespoke furniture, think slower and more expensive.
So copying and pasting nuclear power plants could be the way to go, but there are some disadvantages. One being, if the technology moves forward and you don’t, you could pay a higher price, especially during the operation and maintenance phases of the life of the plant. If safety regulations change in the future that might stifle standardization as you need to make adjustments for new regulations.
As far back as 1948, the French had a standardization policy for its oil and coal power plants. A similar approach was taken with their post-1973 nuclear power plant ‘design and build’ operations, resulting in the highest degree of standardization of nuclear reactors in the world. All units are pressurized water reactors and there are three types. According to the IAEA this reduced costs of engineering studies, components and construction costs. We’re talking 30-40% construction cost reductions. The parts that were not standardized are foundation design, grid connection, and the heat sink. Without going off on too much of a tangent, a heat sink is a system that absorbs heat as required without raising the temperature of the heat sink itself. Think of pouring a kettle of boiling water into an icy swimming pool, it isn’t going to make much of a difference to the temperature of the swimming pool. Now remember Fukushima and how it was situated practically on the beach - the sea can be a great heat sink until it turns into a large wave combined with an earthquake - but that’s another story for later.
Returning to French standardization the IAEA also says that technical specification, safety reporting, and procedures are for the most part standardized too. Copying and pasting is all fine unless of course, you are copying the same defects throughout the fleet of reactors. A lot of this information is taken from a 1999 paper by Roche on plant standardization and it’s well worth a read. To give a few more interesting points from the paper, it states some interesting facts and figures.
The first is engineering manpower for design, quality control and assurance for a first of a kind unit, expect to spend 5 million hours, and now copy and paste that and you are down to one million hours. It also discussed backfitting which is when you realize you have to go back to standard plants and fix defects (at least it’s likely to be the same defect in each plant) that you have copied and pasted from using a standard design. Even with this risk, the costs of backfitting were found to be less than 10% of the construction costs which is still less than the 30 - 40% construction cost savings from standardization. I had to include the final sentence in the conclusion of the paper which I suggest you read in a heavy French accent: “This is precisely what has lead the utilities of other countries to follow our standardization policy”. To borrow a French proverb: “There is no pride like that of a beggar grown rich”.

If you click on the below link, I am hoping it will move my ebook up the amazon search ranks so non redditors can see it. Thanks.
https://www.amazon.com/Planet-Uranium-Beginners-Guide-Market-ebook/dp/B07TCHF7T7/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_pdt_img_top?ie=UTF8
submitted by definitelyunshore to UraniumSqueeze [link] [comments]

[MEGATHREAD] Share Your Pricing/Shipping Experiences When Buying AB

Hi All!
With the global pandemic still going on, a lot of sellers big and small are finding themselves out of stock on many items, facing longer than expected delays in trying to restock, and pricing increases. Adding to that, the political climate has further affected pricing and/or delivery times for some countries.
We thought it would be best to create a central thread where ABers can help one another by posting their personal experiences with pricing and shipping regarding their AB purchases from this past year to help all of us understand what the “new normal” will be at least until things hopefully settle down this fall.
Until then, even Amazon is not living up to the next day delivery standard that they’ve set. Please be understanding when communicating with your AB stores and parcel carriers.
For some light reading:
Washington Post - Pandemic aftershocks overwhelm global supply lines
One year after the coronavirus pandemic first disrupted global supply chains by closing Chinese factories, fresh shipping headaches are delaying U.S. farm exports, crimping domestic manufacturing and threatening higher prices for American consumers.
The cost of shipping a container of goods has risen by 80 percent since early November and has nearly tripled over the past year, according to the Freightos Baltic Index. The increase reflects dramatic shifts in consumption during the pandemic, as consumers redirect money they once spent at restaurants or movie theaters to the purchase of record amounts of imported clothing, computers, furniture and other goods.
BBC - Brexit: 'I was asked to pay an extra £82 for my £200 coat'
Under the new rules, anyone in the UK receiving a gift from the EU worth more than £39 may now face a bill for import VAT - with many items charged at 20%.
For goods costing more than £135, customs duties may also apply, which can range from 0% to 25% of the product you're buying if they have not been paid by the sender already.
IMAGE - ‘I haven’t had an on-time delivery in weeks’: The grim reality of online shopping post-Brexit
The issue many are facing, from my research for this piece, is a lack of transparency from some courier companies – though evidently, the online retailer might not know themselves what the hurdles will be until the last minute.
WSJ - Covid-19 Shipping Problems Squeeze China’s Exporters
A logjam in the global shipping industry is testing the resilience of China’s exporters, who have driven the country’s economic recovery by churning out goods to meet surging global demand during the Covid-19 pandemic.
That demand in recent months has outpaced the capacity of a global shipping industry that has been slowed by pandemic safety measures. Chinese exporters have been paying sharply higher rates and struggling to find containers for their goods.
Pandemic-related safety measures have lowered efficiency at ports, leading to delivery delays and containers getting stuck all over the world. In November, only half of global carriers managed to stay on schedule, compared with 80% a year ago, according to a service-reliability index from Sea-Intelligence.
The average turnaround time for containers returning to China was up to 100 days in December from the more typical 60 days, according to the China Container Industry Association.
Container News - Shipping rates in Europe and East Asia continue upward trend
The largest shipping lines of the world have announced new charges in the European and East Asian regions in December and into next year.
Research and Markets - Impact of COVID-19 on the Global Cosmetic Industry
Effect of COVID-19 on the cosmetic industry can be observed globally in all the regions including North America, Europe, Asia Pacific and Rest of the Word. In the US, the lockdown situation is going on for a long period of time as per the government guidelines. Most of the companies also had to cut down the workforce or had to send their employee for work from home leading to a decline in production rate. Additionally, the same downfall of the cosmetic industry was also experienced in the European region.
One of the major effects was on the company’s global supply chain that was affected by halted factory work in China. Moreover, countries such as India have lockdown the whole nation and major e-commerce companies including Amazon.com and Walmart owned Flipkart has halted the supply of non-essential products (including cosmetics) which is also expected to affect the cosmetic industry in the near future.
The Guardian - Online order boom and flight cutbacks fuel parcel delivery delays across Australia
At the same time, Australia Post has warned of reductions in its air freight capacity as airlines have cut back their services, which means letters and parcels will take longer to arrive at their destination – particularly in regional and rural communities.
submitted by AutoModerator to AsianBeauty [link] [comments]

Best Bed Stores in the UK?

This may be quite an odd question to ask potentially 280k people.
My partner and I have recently sworn off Ikea furniture. My question to you is, where would you recommend purchasing a good quality bed in the UK? Would you recommend small independent retailers? Is one big retailer much better than the rest and worth the money? I've not made this purchase before and considering the money being spent I don't want to make a mistake and end up with something of poor quality that has been overpriced.
After swearing off Ikea, we now cannot decide which stores we can trust to have good quality furniture that isn't ludicrously expensive. Our budget is about £750-1000 for a king size bed, headboard and mattress. We'd also like to be able to see / test the beds (we will wait until stores open up again) and so we've avoided online only stores for now, though any help would be appreciated!
Thanks!
submitted by PersephoneNarcissus to AskUK [link] [comments]

Knowing me, knowing you.

Back on the sauce again. That didn't take long. 10 or so weeks sober pissed down the drain because I couldn't hack sober living with CA Girlfriend. Obligatory disclaimer: if you don't like long posts you might want to look away.
Since I last posted things haven't exactly been swell at home. My primary purpose - finding a job so I wasn't financially dependent on my CA Girlfriend and could kick her out if she started shit again - just fell by the wayside. She milked her fractured hip for all it was worth and I became her houseboy, having to do everything for her bar chewing her food. I stopped protesting having to do things I figured she could do herself; even the merest hint of "can't you do that yourself?" would be met with a screaming tirade of how this was all my fault and I'm such a piece of shit. So I'd just silently go along with whatever inane task I had to do for her; the quicker it was done the better the quicker I would be able to do the next thing she lined up for me. I couldn't even power on my laptop to look for jobs or I'd get shit like "are you just going to ignore me now so you can fuck around on your laptop for hours?" I could swivel the chair aside and show her my resume and job sites I was applying to and she would silently "ok whatever" it...then start asking me to do this or that for her; can you make me some lunch? Will you go to the store and get some cigarettes? Can you go to the other store for soda? Can you wash the dishes like you were supposed to do? I would just give up; I knew I wouldn't get more than 2 minutes to myself before she'd fire off another chore. Then and now, it's like she has a sixth sense that detects when I'm relaxed and she has a pathological urge to disrupt that. By the time I was done my brain was fucking fried. I'd be exhausted and just couldn't focus, I'd fire off applications to jobs I wasn't qualified for, or have to read the same job description three times before it sank in before inevitably crawling in bed. All the ones I thought were well within my ability to get hired for didn't even so much as send me a "thanks but no thanks." It was like moving back to the US all over again, where my professional work experience didn't count for shit because employers had never heard of anyone I worked for. Over 5 years of working in the UK finance industry and the best I can get in the US is working for fucking Savers. Only this time I also had a patchy-as-hell work history courtesy of five years of being a homeless CA!
CA Girlfriend and I had settled into a pattern of having at least one screaming argument a week, always over nothing, that would ionevitably end in her threatening to leave. The illogic of it did not compute. She could be saying "I love you" and practically strangling me in a hug one hour, and then gloating about making me homeless the next. I'd go to bed miserable, I'd wake up the next day and she'd act like nothing ever happened. If I ever tried to bring up our argument to speak in my defense, it would just set her off again and she'd double down on the victim complex. I learned to just silently bite my tongue and mentally go elsewhere while she talked shit about me every day.
I caved, around two weeks ago. The weekly arguments had turned into a nightly thing. She would wake up from a nap and seem to be in a good mood but the smallest, most inconsequential thing would set her off and she would start screaming at me on our front porch at like 2 in the morning. I couldn't hack the stress anymore; when she'd be done screaming I'd be gasping like a fish for air, my hands would be shaking like day 1 DTs, head racing, heart pounding. Fuck that. I had some leftover beer that she didn't know about, from the last time I went on a bender. Since I sobered up I'd been tempted to drink some from time to time but it didn't require much effort to resist the temptation. Now, the beer was practically purring my name. The first night, I shotgunned a couple of beers and downed half a bottle of cooking wine we had in the cupboard. Could tell I'd been off the sauce for a while because it went straight to my head. Nevertheless it served its intended purpose. I could hear the Popeye music, when he eats his spinach, ringing in my ears. CA Girlfriend would stomp around the house, muttering insults and threats and it didn't affect me, at all. I paid it no mind and just waited till she skulked off to bed before enjoying some wonderful alone time. I didn't really wake up with a hangover the next day, as much as I had a mild headache, but after a few pints of coffee and some ibuprofen, things were back to normal.
Last week things took a turn for the unexpected. From the weekly, then daily, arguments we'd been having, I concluded that even without booze CA Girlfriend very likely had severe mental health issues. I never for a moment suspected she'd been secretly boozing; she never went anywhere without me, she couldn't, and when she tried getting around without her walker she realized she would have to do more stuff for herself just ended up hurting herself again and concluded it was too early for her to do stuff alone. But last week the proverbial cat got out of the bag. As I crawled out of bed and shambled into the living room she wasn't there. Weird, maybe she was outside having a cigarette. I poured myself a cup of coffee and went outside to join her only to find she wasn't there. A tiny little voice at the back of my head knew what was up. She's gone to get a drink. Panicking, I went back inside to see if she was having a stealth-poo in the bathroom or something and hadn't heard me get up, but the bathroom was empty. I found a note on the coffee table I'd overlooked as I waddled past it earlier; she'd gone to the grocery store and would be back soon. My blood ran cold. We'd just gone to the grocery store the day before and spent way, way, more money than was necessary on groceries. There was absolutely nothing she could have needed from the grocery store that necessitated a next day visit, let alone first thing in the morning. She did this a lot, earlier in the year, and it often presaged a fullblown relapse from her. I'd wake up and she'd be gone. She'd inevitably appear not long after I'd woken up claiming she'd just gone for a walk around the local park, or gone to the gas station for a fountain drink. I would discreetly check her banking app when I still had access to it and find that she'd either spent money when she claimed to have gone to "the park", or spent significantly more than a fountain drink would have cost. I can almost laugh at the chain of logic that flashed through my head then: 99% chance she's gone to get booze, when she comes back she will be in a bad mood and want to fight. Solution: drink.
I'd just finished drinking my second beer and wiped my ass before I heard the front door open. "Honey? Are you awake!?" well if I wasn't then I would be now. I exit the bathroom and put on my best fake smile as I see her stumble in with three full shopping bags. I help her put the unnecessary groceries away and can't help but note how she keeps chopping and changing between asking if I'm mad at her and apologizing for leaving without waking me up. I smile and say it's not a problem. She's speaking with a flat affect so I know she's trashed. I need to check her phone. She changed her PIN during her our last meltdown after I let her know that I'd gone through her messages and she'd been speaking to her ex (who supposedly raped her) about her child who she claimed was dead (and has since never mentioned). Perhaps she never realized entering her new PIN while stood right next to me was the brightest of ideas. I was only 99% sure she'd gone for a drink, I needed to be sure. I waited till she went outside for a cigarette and, heart in my throat, opened her Lyft app to check her ride history: there in damning evidence, she popped by the local liquor store on her way to get groceries. My heart sinks. I don't don't know why I'm sad. I don't know why I'm disappoined. Maybe I'm hopelessly optimistic? Maybe I'm a hopeless romantic? Maybe I was hoping to be proved wrong?
The next day I wake up to her discreetly going through my pants for her debit card. "What are you doing?" I gurgle. "I need to go to the store" she snaps, "we need food, in case you hadn't realized". I'm not buying it, and there's enough booze in my blood where I don't have to back down, "there's plenty of food in the fridge and freezer. We don't need food". She must have realized she was cornered and changed her tune. "I'm sick of waiting for you wake up. I get up at 5:30 every day and you don't get up till 12!" (she wakes up much later than that and I much earlier, but whatever). I get up with a headache, already mentally debating how long it will take for her to calm down. "Can I have my debit card?" she snaps. "It's right there in my wallet, help yourself" I point to my jeans on the floor as I sip my coffee. She lost her apparently $100+ purse the last time she fled to a hotel so has asked me to keep it in my wallet, as whatever she wears doesn't usually have pockets. "OK, I'm going to the store now" I ask her if she can't just wait until I have a couple of mugs of coffee and she hits the fucking roof. "You're such a controlling bastard!" she screams, "I can't go anywhere without you! Every time I try to go somewhere you threaten I can't come back and I can't even get my own furniture!" I try not to laugh. I'm not controlling with her, not in the fucking slightest. She demands I go with her wherever she goes because someone has to push the shopping cart and unload the groceries we're spending time together. I don't "police" who she talks to - I merely suggest she get some real friends, and not horny old perverts over Facebook who tell her quite clearly "you can come here...not your boyfriend". For someone who's supposedly been raped so many times you'd think she'd have built up a healthy wariness of men. Not so if it suits her purposes.
Things came to a head the other day. I woke up and went outside for my daily coffee and a cigarette. She came outside after me, phone to her ear. I was momentarily worried she was talking to one of her Internet boyfriends. Not so. "Yes, we don't have heat here. I'm sure that's against code isn't it?" My blood runs hot. She doesn't legally live here, but she's calling some housing association about the fact we don't have central heating. Yes, it's cold, but we've just got a new landlord and he walked in on me passed the fuck out, with empties everywhere. Last thing I want to do is rock the boat. I try not to explode. When she drinks her priorities are skewed AF - she doesn't have any patience at the best of times, when she drinks and wants something it has to be done NOW. I bite down and tell her it's probably not the brightest idea to get our landlord in the shit when he likely doesn't like me, knows she doesn't live there, and probably wants to kick me out for being a drunk anyway. "It's anonymous!" she drawls "he won't know it came from you!". I have just enough energy to roll my eyes "you just gave them our address, my name, and our apartment number; who else is he going to think called to report him for code violation?" She makes faces like a fish out of water "he won't know, I'm telling you!" I suspect she's been drinking. It's a twofer - she's monologuing and has that flat effect when she's been drinking, and she also places the utmost priority on shit that doesn't matter. I wait till she lights up another cigarette and go inside for a snoop.
I know she's had a drink. I just know it. It's not enough for her to pop by the gas station and shotgun some shooters; she brought some home with her. No way she can maintain this level of insanity hours after she ostensibly had her last drink. I heard the scrape of plastic on wood the other day so I'm sure she hid some in her drawers. I pull them open and dive in with both hands, sifting through her clothes expecting to feel the shape of an empty shooter or a fifth. I go through the three of them and feel nothing. No, I know I'm not wrong. Hmm, there's a cubbyhole above her drawers and I throw my hands into them. I snag gold not long after - my hands fasten on what feels like an empty milk carton. I take a quick peek to see if she's come inside without my hearing and look at what I've grabbed - Target own-brand wine. I simultaneously die a little inside and applaud her sheer ballsiness. We went to Target the other day, ostensibly to get presents. We split up at her insistence - "I don't want you to see what I'm buying for you!" I know now that was bullshit; she wanted to get some booze and hide it from me. Clever girl. I almost want to tell her "well done". I'd have never had the audacity to be that transparent with my booze-buying.
Yesteday was pretty good for us. I knew she was sauced when I woke up - slurred speech, excitability, attention and memory problems etc. I had a big bottle of vodka stashed to deal with her shit; every time she went outside I'd duck down and fill up a mixer. She made some noises about going to the mall; "I need x, y, z!" I knew if I just dragged my heels and gave her enough time to get more drunk she'd forget about it. By noon, mission accomplished. She was slurring heavily and forgot about leaving the house "I hurt too much to go anywhere" Aww, poor diddums. I made some token noises about sympathy and silently gloated.
Today was an absolute shit show. I don't know why I thought things would be ok or pretending to not notice her drinking would go down smoothly. I woke up with a raging hangover. My eyelids lifted a little to see her creeping around the bedroom, trying to be stealthy. My heart dipped a little when I could see she was already a little sloshed. I closed my eyelids again and pretended to be asleep as I heard her shuffling around the room. When I was sure she was gone I checked my watch: 0650. Fuck me, I usually get up 0900-1100. I cradled my morning wood and pretended to be asleep whenever she came back into the room. I knew what she was about; I could see out of the corner of my eye she was fully dressed. She was going to slip her debit card out of my wallet and discreetly pop off to the gas station for a drink. I froze in indecision. Should I wake up and challenger her? Should I wait until she goes to the store to get my own drink on? I gave it about 20 minutes before I rolled out of bed. I fully expected her to be gone, and when I went into the living room I assumed she was. I scratched my dick and went to get a cup of coffee when she suddenly popped out of the bathroom. "Good morning!" she beamed. I pretended not to notice that she was fully dressed, shoes and all.
I poured myself a cup of coffee and indicated I was going outside for a drink and a smoke. I couldn't help but notice she'd left her phone on the coffee table, unlocked, and on the text app. She was messaging the interloping fuck she went to meet last time we got into a fight. I couldn't help but have a peek. "I can't go anywhere by myself. I'm on lockdown. He won't let me go. I need to meet you to rent a car." Priorities. I can't drive. I don't know how to. I never learned. I grew up in Northern England, where it's perfectly feasible to get around without a car. Here it's a necessity and she's made plenty of noises about wanting one. I've tried to patiently explain if we're going to get a car she needs to wait until I get a job and I've saved up enough time and money to learn how to drive the damn thing. She can't wait. She won't. I've never met anyone who wasn't so much impatient as much as anti-patient: she's offended by the mere idea she has to wait her turn like everyone else. So many places we've been where she has me wait in line and the moment I'm there she goes swanning off to look at x, y, z. "Can't you just wait in line like everyone else?" I've hissed. She looks at me like I'm missing braincells and explains I can hold our place in line. She can't drive; she shouldn't. She's had like two DUIs and her license taken away from her. She's also a felon and has an active warrant out on her. I've tried pointing out - sans mentioning her drinking - all we need is a cop to pull us over for her erratic driving and she's off to prison for a long, long, time. She won't have it. "You don't drive so you don't know how often cops don't pull people over" she snaps.
I don't say anything about what I've seen on her phone and pretend not to have noticed it's still unlocked as she comes out to join me for a cigarette. "Can I have my debit card?" she asks. I gently ask her what she wants it for as I hand it to her. "I'm going to get a heater" she says. She goes inside for a cigarette and I see her still-unlocked phone now shoes a Lyft incoming. She comes outside for a cigarette again, shoes and coat on. "Why are you so dressed up?" I ask, "you're not going anywhere, are you?" She rolls her eyes "I said I'm going for a heater", "I didn't realize you were going somewhere to get it" I say. "I thought you meant you were ordering it online?" She chuckles with a smile that doesn't reach her eyes "I told you I was going out to get one, that's why I asked for me debit card!" She never said that. I play dumb, "OK, let me throw some clothes on and we'll go". "Ugh" she tuts "I need room to breathe. Can't I go anywhere without you?" I tell her OK, and make out like I'm going inside for another coffee. I make sure she's not coming back inside and fish out the vodka I'd stashed for a glug. I go back outside with a smile on my face "you're not going to get some booze, are you?" She practically snarls at me "oh my God, can't I leave the house without you accusing me of things!?" I stop pretending and drop the act. I tell her I've found her empties around the house, including the receipt from Target showing she'd only bought booze. She immediately fires back "I know you have been drinking in secret too. I've smelt it on your breath the last two nights". I play dumb but internally panic. Stupid, stupid, stupid me to think she wouldn't notice. "I don't know what you're talking about" I say. She rolls her eyes again "gimme a break. I drink, you drink. What's the issue?" I practically draw blood biting down on my tongue. I could say she goes completely fucking crazy when she drinks. I could say we were supposed to go sober together. Instead I go for troll mode: I tell her if she's so insistent about going out alone to drink she shouldn't bother coming back. "Fine" she sneers, "fuck Christmas, amirite?" she stomps off to get in the Lyft she ordered and zooms off.
I momentarily worry about her coming right back because she changed her mind or forgot something. I suit up and run to the local gas station for a fifth of my own. Time to fight fire with fire.
Edit: In a Delicious_Mod first, she came home not long after and cried herself to sleep next to me, after she 'found' me pretending to be asleep. I waited until I heard her snoring and slipped out for a refill and a discreet shit. She came storming out of the bedroom not long after and just went for it. Decided to record her flipping her shit unprovoked. I said absolutely not a goddamn thing. Enjoy.
submitted by Delicious_mod to cripplingalcoholism [link] [comments]

DIY makeover on my turd of a kitchen for less than $500

TL;DR: Painted upper cabinets and backsplash white, countertop used marble countertop paint kit, and lower cabinets grey and yes, I’m aware my hood vent is stupid high (another project for another time).
Here are the progression pictures: https://imgur.com/a/nvQqPqy
I didn't think to take a really good before picture until after I finished the upper cabinets, so I used the picture of the kitchen from before I moved in. The cabinets look super gross in the before picture.
For years, I have wanted to tear out this kitchen and start fresh. The cabinets aren't in great shape, there are false drawers where they should have had actual drawers and don't get me started on that ridiculously high hood vent. However, that costs a lot more money than I'm ready to fork over at the moment. So until that day arrives (if ever), I’ve decided to do a DIY cosmetic makeover to my crappy kitchen.
I chose to go with a two-toned kitchen (white uppers and grey lowers) with white marble countertops and a white backsplash. This small, dark kitchen definitely needed the white to brighten up the space, but I don’t trust the lower cabinets to stay clean looking with some of the people living in this house, so I chose to go darker with the lower cabinets.
This is my first time doing this, so I’m sure I made a lot of mistakes, but I’m overall very happy with the results.
I did this makeover in phases starting with the upper cabinets and hinges > backsplash > lower cabinets and hinges > countertops. I purchased all the supplies as I moved on to the next phase (ended up totaling around $430) but I'm sure if you bought all the supplies at the same time you might end up saving even more money.
I still need to switch out the outlets and light switch covers to a white, but I have no immediate plans to do that yet.
You might notice that I also have a new faucet and towel bar. I added those prior to this remodel and have linked them at the very bottom of this post.
I’ve listed my entire process and product lists below. Warning: This is a very long post
Here’s the full makeover process I followed if you're interested:

Upper Cabinets:

I mostly followed the instructions from the Giani Granite cabinet painting tutorial (with some alterations): “Nuvo Cabinet Paint - Instructional How-To Video” by GianiGranite
But here is the full process that I followed for the upper cabinets:
  1. Removed cabinet doors (the video shows how to do it without removing the doors, but it actually seemed more difficult to get full coverage that way, so removed them)
  2. Removed hinges and taped each hinge with screws attached, labeled and placed each hinge set in a plastic baggie and labeled, for example, baggie #1 (cabinet), hinge 1A (top) taped and labeled, and hinge 1B (bottom) taped and labeled.
  3. Sanded cabinets and doors with 300-grit sandpaper
  4. Cleaned with TSP substitute (1 tablespoon borax mixed in a gallon of water)
  5. Cleaned off with Windex
  6. Primer x 2 coats (The tutorial didn’t use primer, but I decided to prime using KILZ Original Interior Multi-Purpose Oil-Based Wall and Ceiling Primer) for the white cabinets
  7. Cleaned paintbrush and roller with paint thinner to remove oil-based primer
  8. Sanded again after 2nd coat of primer dried with 220-grit (I read some instructions after priming that suggested doing this between coats… oh well)
  9. TSP substitute and Windex process again
  10. Nuvo Titanium Infusion Cabinet Paint by Giani Granite x 2 coats
Upper Cabinet Supplies List:
\* Already owned this item prior to this phase
Upper Cabinet Paint Cost + Tax (My cost / Total supplies cost) = $61.02 / $101.34

Hinges:

The hinges, which are visible from the outside of the cabinets were originally an antique brass color that wouldn’t go with the new cabinet colors, so I decided to spray paint them a silver metallic color.
I used this video tutorial as a guide: “Spray Painting Old Hinges to Look Like Brass - Antique Restoration Repair Furniture” by Ross Taylor Woodworks
My hinge painting full process:
  1. Soaked each hinge set in Windex overnight (An Ammonia cleaner would have been cheaper but couldn’t easily get ahold of any during the pandemic)
  2. Soaking the hinges for just these 4 cabinets used up a lot of Windex. So, I emptied the remainder of the large Windex bottle into my two existing Windex sprayers and used a coffee filter to filter out the gunk of the “soaking” Windex back into the big bottle to reuse for soaking the bottom hinges. Once done with the bottom cabinets, I threw the “soaking Windex” out.
  3. Rubbed hinge set with steel wool
  4. Set each hinge set on a cardboard box with screws poked in the cardboard to sit them straight up (placing labels on the box so I don’t mix up the hinges)
  5. Spray painted using Rust-Oleum Universal Gloss Titanium Silver Metallic Spray Paint and Primer In One (made sure to spray from different angles on each side after it dried and move the hinges)
  6. Repeated process for bottom cabinet hinges during the cabinet painting process
Hinges Supplies List: (Prices rounded up to the nearest dollar)
\* Already owned this item prior to this phase
Full Hinge Paint Cost + Tax (My cost / Total supplies cost) = $13.99 / $21.00
Backsplash:
I painted our stone backsplash white using this video tutorial as a guide: “How to Paint a Tile Backsplash | Ask This Old House” by This Old House
However, since my backsplash was more porous than the backsplash featured in the video, I decided to use the leftover primer and white cabinet paint I used for the upper cabinets. Following the advice from this blog: https://athomewiththebarkers.com/paint-stone-backsplash/
After I finished painting the backsplash I realized that the blog suggested using a semi-gloss paint, but my paint was satin, therefore more matte than I wanted, so I went over it with a couple of coats of Semi-Gloss Polyurethane.
My full backsplash process:
  1. Spray caulk with Goo Gone Caulk Remover and let sit for at least 2 hours
  2. Remove caulking with Allway scraper tool (I used box cutter as well)
  3. Wiped down the caulked area with rubbing alcohol to help remove any caulk residue
  4. Remove any outlet / light switch covers from backsplash
  5. Clean backsplash with bleach/water cleaner (I used Lysol Lemon Breeze) and abrasive pad (3M stripping pad)
  6. Repeat process with Lime-Away and abrasive pad
  7. Sand backsplash with 400-grit sandpaper
  8. Wipe down with damp clean cloth and let dry for at least 15 minutes
  9. Tape off surrounding walls, cabinets and countertops
  10. Cut in grout lines with brush and roll with KILZ primer x 1 coat (I would have done 2 coats but it didn’t look like I had enough primer to do the entire backsplash with 2 coats)
  11. Cut in groat lines with brush and roll with Nuvo Titanium Infusion Cabinet Paint x 2 coats
  12. Brushed two coats with Semi-Gloss Polyurethane with 1 in. Flat Chip Brush
  13. Recaulking process found in the countertop section
Backsplash Supplies List:
\* Already owned this item prior to this phase
Full Backsplash Cost + Tax (My cost / Total supplies cost) = $49.46 / $120.54

Lower Cabinets:

Again, I mostly followed the instructions from the Giani Granite cabinet painting tutorial here: “Nuvo Cabinet Paint - Instructional How-To Video” by GianiGranite
Here is the full process that I followed for the lower cabinets:
  1. Removed cabinet doors (the video shows how to do it without removing the doors, but it actually seemed more difficult to get full coverage that way, so removed them)
  2. Removed hinges and taped each hinge with screws attached, labeled and placed each hinge set in a plastic baggie and labeled, for example, baggie #1 (cabinet), hinge 1A (top) taped and labeled, and hinge 1B (bottom) taped and labeled.
  3. Sanded cabinets and doors with 300-grit sandpaper
  4. Cleaned with TSP substitute (1 tablespoon borax mixed in a gallon of water)
  5. Nuvo Earl Grey Cabinet Paint by Giani Granite x 2 coats
Lower Cabinet Supplies List:
\* Already owned this item prior to this phase
Lower Cabinet Paint Cost + Tax (My cost / Total supplies cost) = $80.68 / $108.87

Countertop:

I strongly suggest following the video instruction (and detailed manual): “Giani DIY Marble Countertop Paint Kit - Epoxy Topcoat” by GianiGranite
I have tiled countertops, so if you have a smoother countertop, it will probably turn out even better than mine. I had to remove the caulking between the countertop tile and the wooden edge. I tried filling up that space with the wood patch but it didn't come out as smooth as I would have liked even after sanding. Now I will say that the wood patch that I used might have been too old and I didn't feel like buying more. In the end, I said f it and just went ahead with painting. So the edges are pretty shitty, but that is 100% my fault.
Here are the steps I took:
Surface Prep:
  1. Scrubbed countertops with SOS Pads
  2. Rinse soap residue off with wet cloth x 3 times
  3. Remove caulking around backsplash and around sink (use Goo Gone Caulk remover as needed)
  4. Remove caulk residue with alcohol
  5. Patch any cracks with wood patch and let dry
  6. Sand wood patch with 600 grit sandpaper
  7. Wipe down counters with damp paper towel
  8. Use frog tape around counter edges on backsplash, cabinets and around sink
White Base Primer:
  1. Edge in with foam brush and roll on 1st coat white base primer
  2. Let dry for 4 hours
  3. Edge in with foam brush and roll on 2nd coat white base primer
  4. Let dry for 1 hour
  5. Check and coat missed spots of white base primer
  6. Let dry for another 3 hours
Marble Veining:
  1. Paint major grey veins onto countertops (See Giani Marble video for detailed instructions)
  2. Paint ghost veins
  3. Add white highlight (optional)
  4. Let dry for 4 hours
  5. Lightly sand countertops with 600 grit sandpaper
  6. Wipe countertops with a damp paper towel
Epoxy:
I suggest having two people for this step. One person to handle the epoxy with gloves and one person to set the timers, use the tweezers and hold a light as needed. If not, you will likely get epoxy on everything you touch.
  1. Tape tarp to cover all lower cabinets and floors
  2. Tape bottom of countertop edge
  3. Create a dam with tape along the countertop edge next to any appliances (like your range) if they are not easily removed
  4. Pour entire Epoxy Activator into Epoxy Resin can and mix for exactly 3 min & 15 sec (Only mix one set of Epoxy Activator with Epoxy Resin at a time because it will harden in 30 minutes once mixed)
  5. Pour 2/3 of the can over 6-foot section in 3 even lines across the countertop
  6. Edge in with brush and roll epoxy to cover countertop
  7. Pour a line near the edge of counter and roll over edges
  8. Use light to inspect countertop for bare spots and drizzle epoxy with brush and lightly dab area
  9. Use tweezer to pull out debris like strands of hair, fuzz, etc. (Do not do this after an hour or it will create blemishes within the epoxy)
  10. Repeat steps 4-9 for each 6-foot section of countertop
  11. Remove tape along edges of backsplash, under countertop edge, stove, and sink between 1-2 hours after pouring the epoxy.
  12. After 24 hours, recaulked backsplash with White caulking and smoothing out with
Full Countertop Supplies List: (Prices rounded up to the nearest dollar)
\* Already owned this item prior to this phase
Full Countertop Cost + Tax (My cost / Total supplies cost) = $226.70 / $258.41

Full Supplies List:

Paints/Caulking:
\* Already owned this item prior to this project
Full Kitchen Remodel Cost + Tax (My cost / Total supplies cost) = $431.84 / $496.75
Here are some items that I added to the kitchen before I did this total makeover:
submitted by lollie4489 to HomeImprovement [link] [comments]

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80 Year Old Woman 807 808 80s 8tracks Playlist 90 Granny 90's Moms 90s _bbc A Ateur Wife On The Beach At A Lifetime Of A Perfect Ending Scenes Vid A Side Of A Wadood A Wife's Nightmare Scene Nude Aanal Wpmen Aaron Aarp Abc Of Abdl Abdl Sissy Abducted For Abduction Abigail Spencer Abnormal Aboriginy Abortion Abs Abuse Abused Daughter Vid Abused Abused Vid Abusive Accedental Accidental Cum Gay Video Accidental Accidentally Accomodating Wives Acrobat Actor Male Actor Male Vid Actresses Having Actual Hotel Maid Actual Wife Actual Wife Videos Addicted To And F On Addicted To Gay Porno Addictedtofuckingand Adolescent Adopted Daughter Nude Adorable Lesbian Gif Adorable Teen Videos Adrenaline Adrenaline Wife Adrianna Luna Aduilt Naked Women Adult Amateur Adult Ameutre Adult Amutre Adult Anime Adult Bbw Adult Beach Adult Book Store On Adult Bookstore Gay Photos On Adult Bookstore Phogay Tos On Adult Bookstore Photos On Adult Breastfeeding Adult Breastfeeding Video Adult Brother And Sister On 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https://preview.redd.it/izapwkrcdd661.jpg?width=300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5954285d6770a98c335d04f93a365dd42d555b51
submitted by Anaciite to u/Anaciite [link] [comments]

Moving Adjustments/Venting

(On Mobile sorry for formatting)
. . So I'm pretty new to Lex; moved here about two months ago roughly, just started a night shift job and moved into what I was told is basically 'little México' 🤭 and I'm glad to be back here, honestly. I did a stint at UK but it was just too damn expensive, but just wondering on a few things honestly to help with my moving process.
. . So for some background I'm a young LGBT smoker kid in my early 20s and kinda looking for ways to make some local friends online at least (maybe a few in-person meetups once COVID dies down), because I'm really pretty anxious about meeting new people and I kinda recognise I stick out like a sore thumb. Most of my friends I made at UK graduated or just moved on sadly, so.
. . I'm really enjoying my little neighbourhood all things considered, because I fell in love with Spanish-speaking cultures (to the point of dedicating 6 years or so throughout schooling to both Mexican and Colombian dialects of Spanish). Just haven't really gotten out and explored a whole lot due to COVID, and also that I'm not able to drive due to health reasons.
. . Work is fine, because the pay is good and some of my coworkers are amazing people haha. If I decided to book it though or it doesn't work out long-term, learning about some other entry level options would be nice.
. . Lastly if anyone knows of any good ways to get living room furniture here on a tight budget..? I got recommended to try the Furniture ReStore but if they don't really have good options on living room stuff then I may have to look elsewhere.
-.-.-.- Sorry this was kinda wordy and seemingly random, just wanted to kinda vent this all out to someone besides my roommate, as well as see if anyone has some helpful tips! Thank you in advance if you took the time to read this!
submitted by ZelthSezHerro to lexington [link] [comments]

I am 27 years old and make a joint equivalent salary of $139,000, live in Arlington, VA and work as a Finance Officer

As standard – apologies for the length! I’ve found it quite a cathartic experience, and I seem to have managed to merge elements of the reddit, US and UK R29 templates so please feel free to skip over any boring sections!
Background:
I’m British, working for a British Company in the US on a three-year posting (one year in). My salary is actually £33,000 but due to the increased cost of living here, I get an additional £10,000 allowance for living costs, and my rent/utilities are paid directly by my company. This puts my equivalent salary at $93,000.
I’m aware this is an incredibly fortunate position to be in, especially with COVID, however when I return to the UK, I will be paid my UK salary only, so this is a short-term benefit.
The company can split my pay between my UK and US accounts, and currently 95%ish of it is going to my UK account. This % split was only set up after lockdown as we are currently spending much less on travel/socialising here so are taking the opportunity to focus on building our UK savings. My husband, J, was fortunate enough to get local employment when he arrived in country. He earns an additional $46,000 net which we live on.
For ease/consistency, I have converted all costs at 1.3 as this is roughly the average conversion since I’ve lived here – I will write UK next to any cost/savings that are based in the UK.
Section One: Assets and Debt
J and I (now) combine all our finances, so except for my pension pot, and a small F* Off Fund (FoF - we have one each), everything else is split 50/50. This will likely change when we go back to the UK as we’ll have better access to our own bank accounts.
My personal Net Worth is $72,400
Retirement Balance
UK $104,000
I’ve contributed to work pension schemes since I started working full time age 18. This has been set at around 5% since I joined my current employer 7 years ago, and they contribute around 27%. I’m actually guaranteed £4,000 per year once I retire for as long as I live so have multiplied this by 20 on the assumption the retirement age actually stays at 68 and I make it to my late 80’s. This amount will increase over the years with inflation and as I contribute further to it. I can choose to retire earlier, plus take up to a 25% tax free lump sum on retirement, but that will affect the annual pay-out amount.
Equity
UK $52,000 equity, $157,300 left on the mortgage
J and I bought ($197,600) with just over a 10% ($20,000) deposit 3 years ago aged 24 and contributed half each. I managed to save this as I was living at home until we bought, and J got a help to buy loan through his previous workplace. He’s since cleared this.
Savings account balance
$29,700 made up of:
US $6,700 for fun money here (currently planned for another car – we’ll sell our existing one)
UK $6,500 in premium bonds as my FoF, $13,800 in our joint savings account to upsize when we get back to the UK, $2,600 in one of my side saving accounts as a potential future maternity pot. This is joint but kept in a separate account from the house savings.
Around $22,000 of this has been saved since the beginning of lockdown
Checking account balance
US $120 (+ $1,190 in checking, -$1,070 on AMEX). All our savings accounts are easy access, so we try to keep the balance as low as possible and tend to spend the full amount each month. [We end the week with this back up to $1,559]
UK $660
Credit card debt (and how you accumulated it)
0 – we use our AMEX for our everyday spending, so I’ve included it in our checking account as we usually pay it off each week and use it in place of our checking account. J had CC/loan debt in the UK from the house deposit and wedding which he cleared down before we moved out here.
Student loan debt (for what degree)
0 - neither of us went to University
Anything else that's applicable to you
We paid outright for a second-hand car that is worth around $6,000
Section Two: Income & Further Background
Income Progression:
I started at my current company 7 years ago working as a personal assistant and started on $24,000. I stayed in this role for 2.5 years before promoting into a finance role and onto $31,000. After a year I was temporarily promoted (with pay rise) within my team to a higher finance role and after a further 6 months was permanently promoted into the role and onto $35,750. There’s usually an annual pay rise of around 2%, which I’ve received between each promotion, but as this last promotion pay rise wasn’t as high as usual, my last few annual pay rises have been higher to bring me to my now salary of $43,290. I’ve spent the last three years at the same level, but have changed teams to gain more experience which will be needed for the next promotion which I’ll hopefully be able to get when I return to the UK – this will take me over the $50,000 mark.
Main Job Monthly Take Home:
UK – I get paid once a month, receiving $3,783 after tax, national insurance and pension contributions. This also includes the extra living allowance. $3,510 is paid into my UK account, $273 is paid into the US
US – J gets paid fortnightly, and earns a net salary of $3,546 per month (assuming 2 pay periods per month)
Any Other Monthly Income Here
UK - We receive around $598 per month from tenants in our house in the UK. The letting agents take all management and admin fees directly from the rent before we get paid. This amount can be less if any work needs doing on the property, but again the letting agent will pay directly and just transfer us a reduced amount. We also have to pay tax on any rent received and still need to pay last year’s bill, but we haven’t calculated it yet.
Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?:
Not from family. My parents don’t have degrees, and whilst they supported my siblings going, it was our own personal choice. If we didn’t go, we were expected to work full time.
My school did expect me to go. I was in the last school year before UK University tuition went up, so the only advise they could give was to go now as you won’t be able to afford it in the future. I had a place to study events management but turned it down a week before the deadline. Bar sometimes feeling like I missed out on the University life experience (aka. freshers week), I have zero regrets not going.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent/guardian(s) educate you about finances?
My siblings and I were always encouraged to save including contributing to pensions when we started working, and prioritise this and bills over spending our money, but conversations didn’t go much further than that.
What was your first job and why did you get it?:
Weekly paper round from age 12 to 16 which gave me $10 a week to pay for my phone credit and to build savings. I started working part-time in a supermarket from age 16 earning around $250 a month, but this was mainly spent shopping and in the pub!
Did you worry about money growing up?:
No – my parents operated on a “what we do for one, we do for all”, so with a house of five kids, we certainly weren’t living the life of luxury, but we never went without, and it encouraged me to earn some of my own money from an early age.
Do you worry about money now?:
No, J and I are in a really good position and try to make sensible decisions so that we can still cope if our circumstances change.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?:
Fully when I bought the house and moved out age 24, although I obviously gained the support from J. I’ve always had to use my own money for wants and non-essentials (phone bill, own laptop, “fun” clothes). I was given a few years grace on rent as my parents helped my siblings at Uni, but this stopped when I turned 21. I’ve always bought my own cars/insurance and would contribute to the household, including buying some food and replacing furniture in my room.
Our parents continue to support us anyway they can, which included letting J and I move back in rent free last year whilst we were replacing our kitchen.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income?:
My dad saved around $1,200 from when I was a child which I received aged 18 – this went into savings and then towards my first car and laser eye surgery.
My brothers and I also received $1,950 each from a great aunt when she died, which was a complete surprise (the will was contested so this was several years later). Our much younger half-brother didn’t receive anything, so we split this equally with him. The money left went towards mine and J’s wedding and we also received around $5000 additional from various family members towards our wedding and honeymoon. This was also not expected, and we budgeted not to receive anything, but this was a bonus and it relieved some of the pressure on us to save.
Section Three: Expenses
UK – I auto-transfer $1,170 across various accounts to pay for our UK bills. J & I both kept some bills in our own names to try to maintain our individual UK credit scores as well as our joint one. J’s parents are also looking after our two cats whilst we’re in the US, so we transfer them some money. We’ve discovered our UK entertainment subscriptions work over here so we haven’t cancelled them and pay them from the UK accounts, which is a benefit as they’re usually cheaper.
$910 to our joint account to cover – Mortgage ($986 – includes $130 monthly overpayment), Landlord Insurance ($32), Pet Insurance ($45), our life insurance ($22 – it pains me that the cats cost twice as much as we do. Obviously, they don’t have the NHS covering their medical costs, but they also don’t have a mortgage to pay off….), J’s UK phone bill ($35) – he’s still tied into his contract. The rent income comes into this account so that covers any delta and builds a pot to pay the tax bill. It works out at around $388 per month saved for this. We also pay around ($150) annually to cover IT costs including Microsoft office, McAfee Security and Dropbox storage.
$143 to my bills account to cover – my UK phone bill ($23), a second UK phone bill that I need to cancel as they wouldn’t transfer my existing number to them ($6), Trade Union membership ($19), Netflix ($12), Annual magazine subscription ($19). Any money left over for is for UK online orders and so we have money available when we visit home.
$65 to J’s account to cover – Amazon Prime ($10), Spotify ($20), Audible ($15) and annual Xbox Live ($50)
$52 to J’s parents for the cats.
UK Savings – we have $2,340 to split across the savings. The split varies each month, but as I’ve hit my FoF goal the focus will be on getting J’s to the goal amount and then joint savings.
US – TV, WiFi and Hulu ($131), Phone Bills ($167), Car Insurance ($110), Naked Wines ($40), HelloFresh ($523), Annual Renters Insurance ($152). We currently get Disney+ free with our phones, but this will end soon, and I expect we’ll start paying for it as well.
US Savings – I usually transfer between $500-$1,000 into savings when J gets paid but will vary this based on how much we have left in the checking account from his last pay and what bills are due. We’ll also raid this as needed for big purchases or if we’re running low in on cash in the checking account.

Day 1 – Saturday
0900 – I’ve been waking up on and off for a few hours, but the alarm has gone off, so I drag myself out of bed. J and I are booked into a second-hand book sale from between 11 and 12 so we need to actually get out of the house this morning. I tidy up a bit, have a shower and miss a call from my mum whilst I’m in there. I check J is up before calling her back and have a good catch up with her and my Nan.
1115 – We’re a little later than planned, but we make it to the sale. I picked the second slot so that there would still be a good selection of books available and am pleasantly surprised by the amount and overall COVID set up. We spend almost an hour browsing and come away with 15 books between us. $60.01
1210 – We left the apartment without eating breakfast, but there’s a restaurant open next to the sale that we haven’t tried before so we pop in and have a burger each. Discover there’s a cocktail bar underneath and make note to head back and try that soon. $41.92
1600 – J has spent the afternoon building Ikea furniture we bought last week and hiding in the bedroom watching YouTube videos whilst I clean, watch The Haunting of Hill House and drink copious amounts of tea. We bought our car in a bit of a rush when we arrived and to replace his Rightmove house obsession, J spends a lot of his time looking at cars available here. Last week he found an American muscle car that looks in good shape and isn’t extortionate, so in his argument to “buy American, eat American, drive American” whilst we’re here, he’s arranged a visit check it out and test drive it. We’re meant to be there at half past, but we had the wrong address and there’s been an accident so it’s actually an hour’s drive, and we don’t get there until 1715 - Oops. I do not want to like the car, but I’m honestly sold – I knew our current car wasn’t the best, and planned to cope with it for the three years, but this is such an improvement and feels like a fun car to drive on road trips. We arrange to come back next week to buy the car and head back home. Thankfully, the traffic has cleared so it only takes 40mins. We while away the journey by listening to an episode of My Dad Wrote a Porno.
1830 – We stop by Giant to pick up some essentials (loo roll, seltzer, beer, milk) and food for the rest of the weekend. $103.25. I cook pork chops, roast potatoes, asparagus and gravy for dinner, and we spend the evening chilling in front of Netflix with wine before heading to bed at midnight.
Daily total: $205.18
Day 2 – Sunday
0830 – I wake up and sneak out of bed without disturbing J, make myself a cup of tea and settle down to finish off The Haunting of Hill House. J hates scary shows/films, so I try to watch things before he’s up, but he still needs to be in the house otherwise my imagination will go wild. The show finishes and I hear no sign of movement, so I make another cup of tea and discover The Princess Diaries 2 is on freeform so obviously I watch this.
1100 – J gets up and makes us scrambled eggs and smoked salmon for brunch. There was meant to be a bread roll with this, but according to J it had gone off. Silently complain that I didn’t pick up some bagels whilst we were shopping last night. We stick The Office on in the background and binge far too much of it whilst I multitask and convert our savings/bills spreadsheet into $ for the intro to this.
1630 – I had grand plans to spend the day cleaning and assumed J’s mum would do her weekly skype call with us at 3, neither of which has happened, and I only realise this now. I suggest we message some friends to see if they fancy an afternoon pick-me-up, but they are hanging from last night, and I remember I’m doing interviews in the morning so probably not the smartest move. I have a shower, wash and sort my hair out to save time in the morning.
1800 – I get an email reminding me that I have items in my basket on an online order and that they’ve given me 15% off. Seems rude not complete it – J has a quick browse to see if there’s anything he likes but nothing takes his fancy. So it’s just non-wired bras for me and a very cute bee print quilt set. It’s a UK based store so I pay using my UK bank account. $123
1900 – J cooks dinner tonight, a HelloFresh recipe for firecracker meatballs with rice. We stick The Office on in the background, finish the rest of last nights wine and the entire series, getting to bed at half 11.
Daily total: $123
Day 3 – Monday
0630 – Alarm goes off. Ugh. It disturbs J, so I apologise for waking him, hit snooze and repeat 5 minutes later. Rather than getting straight up, I waste half an hour browsing Facebook before washing and getting ready. As an attempt to look semi presentable, I put actual work clothes on, straighten my hair and put on some mascara and powder.
0755 – I make it onto the laptop and do some prep before the interviews. Checking my emails, I spot that I’ve been paid my US pay today. The annual pay rise has come through and there’s a small backdate from last months pay, so I have an additional $127 this month. I clear a few more emails and make a cup of tea before starting the interviews.
1215 – Interviews are done, and as a panel we have discussed and come to a decision. We all need to type up our outcomes for HR, but I take a lunch break before my brain melts. J heats up leftover meatballs and rice from last night and we watch an episode of The Good Place whilst we eat. J’s heading into the office this afternoon so I tidy up, stick the dishwasher on and faff about on reddit before getting back to work at 1. Go straight back into a call with my Line Manager to touch base before he goes on leave – he lets me know he put me forward (and I have been approved) for a bonus for my efforts since joining last year, and the added COVID response. I’m touched and proceed to spend a while mentally spending it. I’m debating between a pair of Louboutin’s and a spin bike…. Slightly different ends of the spectrum I know. Keen to hear any inspiration! It should be around $1000 after tax so reasonably substantial.
1630 – J comes home and attempts to get in, but I appear to have locked him out. I get up, open the door and see that he comes baring this week’s HelloFresh box, which is a relief as I hadn’t seen any delivery emails (we had a few go missing in our apartment block when we started). I have a small break to see how his afternoon has been and reply to some messages with friends about possible Halloween costumes for a small gathering we’re going to. We jokingly consider a group The Office effort, which results in numerous gifs being shared. In a moment of inspiration, J passes me his shirt, tie and blazer to put on… turns out I’m a pretty convincing Sexy Toby. I get changed back into my own clothes and head back to work for a bit.
1930 – J finished work earlier so cooked again. Tonight’s is a HF spicy shrimp pasta. It’s a bit disappointing even with him adding extras from the cupboard. We eat and watch the Umbrella Academy before heading to bed at 11.
Daily total: $0
Day 4 – Tuesday
0730 – alarm goes off, get up, washed, dressed. No interviews today so back to COVID home working uniform of no make-up and trackies. Make a cup of tea and am at my desk for 0830 – in and out of meetings until 10 and spend the rest of the morning trying to catch up on my inbox. J’s headed into the office, so I take the opportunity to listen to the Hamilton soundtrack as I work. Get through the first track before admitting defeat that despite my amazing multitasking skills, I can’t actually sing along and type coherent emails. Settle for the LOTR soundtrack instead.
1215 – make it to lunch and reheat last night’s leftovers (we order HelloFresh for four people for the leftovers, as before we were just ordering in lunch every day). Realise I haven’t physically left the flat for longer than I care to admit, so take my lunch onto the balcony and eat it whilst reading through a money diary on reddit. Remember I have a meeting at 1, so sign back in ten mins before and read through the emails in a vague attempt to sound prepared.
J buys himself and his boss lunch in the office, but his boss will pay him back so $12.17
1900 – long afternoon, managed to start nothing on my actual to-do-list, so feel like I haven’t achieved anything. Yay. J got home half an hour ago (I didn’t lock him out today!) and switched the oven on as he walked past, so I take the opportunity to get up and cook once it’s done preheating. Pork tenderloin with coleslaw and mash tonight. It comes with a cherry jam sauce which I’m not the biggest fan of, so I make it into a fruity gravy. It takes longer to cook than I planned, and I can feel myself getting more and more annoyed with everything from a general mix of feeling stressed and hangry. J sticks toy story 4 on as we eat which doesn’t help my mood (as let’s face it, it’s the worst one). Our friends message asking if we’re watching the debates – J had planned to but had forgotten so quickly changes over to watch it. I have no words.
We make plans to watch the next debate in a group with alcohol, debate bingo and the next day booked off work to recover.
Head to bed at 1120 – still waste time on Facebook despite being shattered.
Daily total: $12.17
Day 5 – Wednesday
0830 – Alarm goes off. I didn’t get to sleep up until 12.30 and J disturbed me at 1.30 when he came to bed so extra sleep was needed. I check my phone, message my stepsister a happy birthday and stick on my dressing gown to make sure I’m online for my 9am meeting. Thankfully, no one has an update, so the meeting is cancelled, and I have time to shower and put clothes on before I properly start work.
1230 – Lunchtime. I have the remaining shrimp pasta and J makes a BBQ chicken sandwich with other leftovers in the fridge and we stick on another episode of The Good Place whilst we eat. We finish up, work for an hour and then drive into the office. J needs to stay in for a while, but I’m only in to sign a cheque so I take the opportunity to walk back home. It’s a glorious sunny day, but with a nice breeze so it’s an enjoyable walk until I’m almost back at the flat and have to walk up a hill and then 5 flights of stairs. It’s a fast reminder of just how unfit I am, and I have to have a quick lie down to recovecool down before getting back to work.
1730 – J and I have plans to meet up with our friends K and J(.2) tonight. In an act of attempting to keep some form of sanity, J and J.2 are heading out to a bar for a “Gentleman’s Club” and I’m heading round to K & J.2’s flat for wine and chick flicks. J gets home from work, kisses me hi and bye and heads straight back out. K’s getting her hair cut, so I continue working until half 6 before walking up to her apartment. I make a pit stop on route to pick up a bottle of white wine as she’s running low. The card machines are down so it’s cash only – I have a mild panic, but thankfully I find some notes in my purse - although I’m pretty sure I withdrew them pre-lockdown! $17
0200 – After a night of homemade mac’n’cheese, wine, films and putting the world to rights, I get ready to head home just as J.2 stumbles back into the flat. It’s lovely to see him, but the state he’s in makes me a bit concerned about what J is going to be like when I get home. Thankfully, when I make it back and he’s already curled up on his own side of the bed, passed out and lightly snoring away. I take off my makeup, do my teeth, get into bed and fall straight asleep.
*I’ve checked the banking app and J spent $50.50 on food and drink. The “club” made their way to our apartment around 9pm and worked their way through our booze which explains the low spend but high drunkenness.
Daily total: $67.50
Day 6 – Thursday
0700 – J’s alarm goes off. He rarely sets alarms and has an amazing ability to sleep though them, so I kick him awake to switch it off. He hits snooze rather than switching it off, so I wake up again 5mins later. Ugh. He actually manages to switch it off the second time.
0830 – My alarm goes off. I’m tired and thirsty, but other than that feeling pretty ok. J is not and I leave him snoozing in bed as I start work. It’s a slow morning (thankfully) and I periodically check on J to see if he’s feeling any better. General consensus is no. The leftovers in the house are not hangover friendly so we put in an order with Panera Bread. $32.25. J has a choose two, but I brought home some mac’n’cheese from last night so just order some crisps and a smoothie to go with it. It takes longer than expected to arrive, but it means a 1230 lunch in front of The Good Place. We finish and go back to work, J heads into the office again.
1400 – I’ve struggled to get back into the swing of things, and as there haven’t been too many emails coming in I take the opportunity to have a break and lie down on the bed (I work flexi hours and have a very high balance so this is done guilt-free). This lie down turns into an hour-long nap and I wake up feeling better, but still while away some time on reddit before deciding to make it back to work at 4.
1920 – J messaged to say he’s on his way back and I’ve already heated the oven, so I finish for the night and start making dinner. Tonight’s HF menu is a creamy lemon butter chicken with courgette and giant couscous. It’s reasonably simple to make, but one of our favourites. I multitask and clean down the kitchen as I go.
2000 – Dinner is eaten, J has made us a cup of tea and we’re settled back into The Good Place. Yesterday was payday into my UK account so I log into the internet banking and transfer to the savings accounts (the bill transfers are set up to auto-transfer on the 1st). $1,170 to J’s savings so he’s now at his FoF goal, $650 to the maternity pot, and $780 to the joint savings. The annual renter’s insurance has also come out of our US checking account today, but that’s counted in the expenses. We both head to bed at 11.
Daily total: $32.25
Day 7 – Friday
0730 – J’s alarm goes off, he’s heading back into the office this morning so it’s valid today and we both actually wake up for it. We both chill on our phones until my alarm goes off at 0830. Up, washed, dressed and on the laptop in time for my 9am meeting. I’m closing off last months accounts and updating forecasts so get stuck into multiple spreadsheets.
1440 – I’d gotten into a good rhythm with the updates, and without J here, I hadn’t realised the time, so I only stop now for lunch. It’s last nights leftovers so couscous and chicken, plus an apple left over from J’s Panera order yesterday. J didn’t take anything in so has stopped by Safeway $14.13 and the work café $9.48. I get the figures from the banking app and realise J has been paid – win. I have an hour break and head back online.
2020 – I’ve been in the swing of things today. It’s a long winded, but simple task so I’ve had Greys Anatomy on in the background as I work. I’d normally have left some of it until Monday, but I have a few urgent requests in today that need the updated figures so it made sense to get it all cleared – it’s also quite therapeutic so feels like a nice way to end the week . J and I have plans to see friends tomorrow, so I don’t feel too bad about not having plans for a Friday night and working for most of it instead. Still, we make the most of it being payday and order in some Steak Frites for dinner and I treat myself to a chocolate cake slice as well. $80.25. We spend the rest of the evening relaxing, finish watching The Good Place (a very emotional finale) and make it into bed for half 11.
Daily total: $103.86

Total Expenditure: $543.96
Food & Drink: $257.70
Groceries: $103.25
Clothes/Home: $123.00
Other: $60.01

Lastly, reflect on your diary!
This is a pretty average week for us during COVID. We usually go out drinking over every other weekend, but that extra spending would balance out with the home/other expenditure as I try to make sure we spread our spending out. The AMEX balance is a bit higher than the usual weekly amount as J and I both ordered a trunk club a few weeks and kept a few of the clothes but the system errored which delayed us processing our returns (and them billing us). As we’ll looking to buy the car soon, it also feels like a better decision to leave the balance on the card and keep more cash available – I’m not concerned as we’re only just into the new credit statement period and J’s will get an extra pay period this month which will clear it.
Pre-COVID, this is actually lower than our weekly spend, as we also had most of my salary coming into the US account as well and were spending most of it socialising, travelling and just enjoying living in a city. If we had to, we could cut our costs and save a lot more, but we’re here to enjoy ourselves and so long as we can eat and pay the mortgage, we’re happy. We’ve also already reached our total savings goal for our time out here, so anything extra is a bonus.
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Does anyone remember a TV channel called ‘Beneath the Static’? (Part 6)

1 | 2| 3 |4 | 5 | 7 | 8 (FINAL) |
Let me begin by following up on the aftermath of The Day Of Separation.
Everything happened extremely quickly; my Mom went out in a frenzy to search for Tristan, she didn’t even try to register what we said beyond “he’d been taken” and spared no time or expense in getting the wheels moving. The sheriff’s department, our county SAR and a public appeal on state-wide television all yielded absolutely nothing. But you knew that, as did we. If anything, it made it all the harder for us to sit by the sidelines and watch my Mom, who had already lost the only man she loved at a young age, now struggle to deal with the reality of losing her only son. She took sabbaticals from work, spent most of her time researching, calling anyone, putting grounded ideas on a drawing board until the grounded gave way to the fanciful, things beyond what actually happened. She steadily lost her grip with reality until the 3rd anniversary of his disappearance when she passed from a heart attack, Doctors called it broken heart syndrome. I think looking back, she found it too tough to deal with not seeing her boy reach his 21st, even if she had me.
During those years, I tried everything to help her and push the search forward, only ever speaking of what happened in muted tones and furtive conversations late at night with far too much wine in either of our systems. Mom never said she believed me, but she didn’t discount the ideas either. Instead, she sat there every time, wide eyed and patient, slurring her words of revenge on whoever stole her boy away from her. “If I ever catch the person or persons who took Tristan away from me… from us… I will make sure they never rest a day in their lives again. My sweet boy deserved better…” She’d slosh the wine across our couch as she wept, I’d put her to bed and cry myself to sleep, before pushing all the emotions down and returning to the role of the responsible Muldoon.
In the weeks and months after he first “went missing”, the gang went through changes of their own. Preston, perhaps feeling an obligation to stay and help because of his own brother, stayed close by for the first year and made sure we always had something to eat in the highly likely event we were too exhausted to cook. His boyfriend Zachary would always be on hand to help too, full of zest and the kind of dry wit you can’t teach a person. I adored the both of them. Eventually, Zachary got a job offer he couldn’t turn down across the country and asked Preston to join him, which he did. I tearfully watched them go at the airport the following fall and we promised to stay in touch, we didn’t.
Warren went on something of a rampage to begin with, picking fights with anyone and everyone over the smallest issues. He escalated to sticking his nose into disputes that didn’t need him, trying to get any reason for someone to hit him first so he could go to town on them. He said all he saw was Mathias’ and JJ’s faces when he swung, that it didn’t matter how many times he struck them, the rage didn’t go away. This would one day lead to a grievous bodily harm charge in the UK when he got involved in a dispute between a man and his girlfriend. The man slapped his partner so hard it drew blood, Warren clocked him with a clean left and another, then another and so on until the guy was barely moving on the floor, his girlfriend screaming to stop. He was sentenced to 4 and a half years, but was released after 2. When we talked, he seemed oddly at peace, though I wouldn’t truly see the change until he came over.
Millie was the outlier, I know very little about what she got up to. 6 weeks after the day of separation and a few frayed phone-calls, she turned 18 and said she was going to New York to get her bachelor’s degree, to continue her goal and become a mortician. She’d already had her acceptance letter, but was hoping to see how the summer with Tristan went and give a long distance relationship a shot, though she openly admitted they barely got beyond discussing feelings. She came over the day of her move, car packed up with all her things and asked to go into Tristan’s room one last time. Naturally, I obliged and let her in, his room preserved the exact same way we left it; video games stacked on his desk with a laptop perched on a small mini unit, a slew of sticky notes for advice on how to make the blog better and market it efficiently. He truly believed we would be famous one day. Millie sat on the edge of his bed, a sweater of his draped over the gaming chair that she picked up and held in her hands. Even though Tristan was my twin, I knew she was hurting in a way I could never understand. She wept into it, the familiar smell ripping open the wound and letting all the pain out. I told her to keep the sweater and to call once in a while. She promised to call every year on our birthday, but her waving from her Sedan was the last I’d ever see of her.
Not long after the first entry went up, I received an email from Mathias that sent shivers down my spine, especially as I thought I was the only one who’d stayed in the town;
To: Lying bitch
From: Your one and only.
Subject: I guess it’s almost time
“Fay,
I had hoped you’d resurface one day. Folks around town said they’ve not seen you in years! I always kept my distance, mind you. But I knew you were getting on okay and that I’d eventually get my chance to swoop in and comfort you. Only… that never happened. You refused all visitors, drank yourself into oblivion and sold your “tortured art” to make ends meet. You took what could’ve been a beautiful life between us and you wasted it. We’re nearly 30 now, Fay. Nobody is going to want a washed up spinster who can’t even have kids. They say your eggs are largely gone by this point… doesn’t that bother you? Doesn’t it concern you that the ONLY man you’ve ever pined for in your life is your DEAD BROTHER? Women are meant to be more than this… I at least learned that much from Callista.
I get that you’ve never much cared for physical interaction, but I think I could change your mind if you’d just look past my indiscretions and let me in. Besides, that was what was promised to me all those years ago and I fully intend to collect what I’m owed one way or another.
Maybe it doesn’t matter if you don’t oblige, maybe it’ll never happen in your lifetime. But some things transcend the world we live in and maybe this is just one of those times, Fay.
The sages are coming to visit, the moment the borders are open again I KNOW they will. That’s fine, I welcome it. WE welcome it. The job was never done. You didn’t tell JJ or Ernesto what happened at Mantis Reach and I sure as hell wasn’t about to, not without the whole “gang” there to admit their guilt. Luckily, I know you well enough. All of you will want to end this and I couldn’t agree more. So, here’s the footage, do your review and when it’s over… come find me.
You know where we’ll be.
I love you. You make my skin bubble and feel hot to the touch in a world where everything is pins and needles.
Mathias.”
I don’t need to tell you why it makes me more uncomfortable than anything else in so many years. But the timing could not be ignored. Attached was a .mov file I had never thought would still be intact, but with Mathias being the technical expert he is, I wasn’t the least bit surprised. I saved the email and began making contact with the group. First with Preston, then Warren and finally Millie, resolving we’d meet back here where it all began when the time was right.
They flew in on Friday and the first thing we did when we got to the basement was play the file Mathias sent;
“The Fall Of Mantis Reach.Mov”
The first thing that struck me about the group as we traversed back to my home was that age-old adage; The more things change, the more they stay the same.
I don’t know if the alcohol-filled nights and lack of change in my routine had not aged me much, but save for a few inches in height growth and a pixie haircut to my still-dyed red hair, I hadn’t changed all that much. Sure, I had a few more stylistic changes to my wardrobe and a scaffold piercing, but that was about it. “You literally look like you’ve had a minor wardrobe change, and that’s it. How the hell is that possible after 10 years?!” Preston exclaimed with tears in his eyes. He was taller, slightly leaner and with a bit more muscle to his frame, but happily still a larger man. He wore custom sweaters he’d print under his own clothing line “P & Z Streetwear”. This one was a demonic Gengar devouring Ash Ketchum, mini Haunters ladened across the sleeves.
“I guess I just got lucky. Meanwhile, you look fresh to death!” I replied, beaming at him as he chuckled and combed his afro.
“Well, I still think I’m pretty sensitive, but Zachary definitely imbued me with confidence! He sends his apologies, he couldn’t be with us, he wanted to come but… Sages only, right?” He gave a weak grin and patted me on the shoulder before heading downstairs, laughing as I repeated my brother’s cheesy line; “mmm… you may pass!”
Warren, to his credit, didn’t look as old as I’d imagined he’d be post-prison. His mohawk now a slicked back undercut and a thick black beard, sporting a business casual attire and a black metal band tee underneath that he flashed us with a quick grin.
“Didn’t want you thinking I’d gone all corporate.” He smiled, pulling me in for a one-armed hug, his more defined frame shocking me at first as he whispered, “I’m sorry it’s been so long, Fay. We’ll figure this out, no matter what. I fuckin’ promise you.” Before stroking my hair for a moment and heading downstairs.
Lastly, there was Millie. Even more beautiful than I remembered, she sported an all black attire and was clad in a Neo-goth outfit from the multi-clasped platform boots up to her choker that ended in the same lucky cat’s paw. Her face filled with piercings from the septum to her stretched ears, which prompted me to tap my own as she flashed a small smile. Before we even said anything, she hugged me tight, an unexpected bit of affection from someone we’d always known to be incredibly distant.
“I wish I’d been in touch. But the longer it went and the closer I got to that day, I just… I…” her voice breaking, the shame bubbling over. I soothed her and pulled away, smiling.
“What matters is you’re here now and come rain or shine, we’re gonna finish this, right?” I beamed at her and she nodded affirmatively, clutching at her choker.
“10 years is long enough, let’s do this.”
The basement was much like Tristan’s room; frozen in time. We’d decided early on to not change anything, in case we ever elected to go back and finish things. Though, I imagine most of us were too broken and terrified to ever do so back then. The same amount of chairs positioned themselves across the room and we could see small bloodstains where Mathias had once sat, crumbs in Prestons area and a distinct groove from how Warren fidgeted in his. Without saying anything, we moved our seats around and left Tristans directly in the middle where it belonged, turning Mathias’ to face the wall. It may sound silly, but it was symbolic. He was gone to us.
As we set up the Apple TV to cast the file to, we began catching up on what we’d lost.
Fay: So, what’s the biggest changes for you guys? I mean, a decade is a hell of a long time… though the last few months definitely felt like a lifetime in of itself.
Preston: I hear ya. We were lucky to operate our business from home, but not everyone was so fortunate. I guess the biggest thing for me is Zack & I’s wedding, we’re aiming for 2021 and of course we’d like you all there.
Fay: That’s… that’s wonderful! Of course we will be, I bet you’ve got a hell of a caterer, right?
Warren: Well, mine’ll kinda shock you guys… but I have a little boy.
He was right; it did. Warren had never shown much interest in anyone and didn’t seem the type to let anyone close, but the way he smiled and the love in his eyes in that moment suggested otherwise.
Millie: No shit… how old? What’s his name? Is he anywhere near as loud as you?
Warren laughed, heartily in fact. The insecurity he had as a teenager clearly long gone. He pulled out his phone and showed us a smiling boy, gap toothed and holding up a drawing of his family, including Warren and his partner.
Warren: He’s 3 and his name… is Frankie. After my little brother. Damn talkative and I gotta watch what I say around him now, or Zara will have my head. But, I love him, love my family. They saved me.
He looks so fulfilled, I couldn’t help but feel overjoyed.
Millie: Well, in my case, I became the mortician I’d always said I’d be. Got *really* good at it, in fact. I teach other students while I foster animals in my spare time. I know, I know. Lucky cat’s paw and dead things are still fun, but there’s something… wonderful about helping them find love again, y’know? It’s… part of why I wanted to come back here. To put this to rest, both what happened and who we were back then.
There was a murmuring of agreement before the video flashed up and a preview of the file greeted us. It was a shot of the whole group standing in front of a large wooded building, me and Tristan pulling the fusion dance from DragonBall Z, Warren fake punching Preston as he holds up his hands, Millie smiling while looking over at Tristan and Mathias staring at the kid near the centre of the photo, squatting down with his hands clasped, wiry brown hair protruding from beneath a red trucker hat;
Dallas “Livewire” Mendoza.
This was the night it happened.
00:01 - The camera turns on as the group is seen hiking up the trail and joking to themselves. The camera zooms in and out dramatically on Warren as he makes huge strides up the trail as a younger me laughs from behind the camera.
“Ohh look at our Super Saiyan as he leads the way to our glorious hideout!” I declared, putting on my most announcer-like voice. Warren grinned and pulled Preston in for a headlock, who immediately tapped as Millie laughed.
“You guys are such dorks, what are we discussing in the hideout today?” Millie called out as the camera pans over to her, brushing her hair out of her face. Livewire could be seen at the top of the hill, fumbling with the keys to get in the main door.
“Matters of the utmost importance, my good lady.” Livewire replied in his most regal voice, much to our delight. The brass key turned in the lock with a deft clunk and the steel door creaked open as our younger selves sauntered inside, giddy that we’d reached a place where we could be ourselves.
Preston: Man, it’s kinda crazy to think that this was 15 years ago, and it still looks fresh even now. Technology is insane. Warren: You’re telling me, was I always that fuckin’ small?Millie & Fay: Always. Fay: And loud, don’t forget loud.
Warren: Alright, alright. You got me there, but man… doesn’t the old place give you the willies?Preston: No… but seeing LiveWire does.
00:05 - We watched as the camera followed the group inside. The structure was imposing, warped and downright bizarre. Situated over three floors, the building had been left to the annuls of time after Mantis Reach was declared an unsafe commodity by the local councils back in the mid-80s. Restoration and housing was a big part of the governmental promise and I suppose they felt the need to foreclose any unsightliness or ugliness that the town perceived to have. So, much like lancing a boil, Mantis Reach was cut off from the world and hidden away so the tourists didn’t see it.
Now, one of the last derelict buildings stood there, a monolithic skeleton of mortar, cast iron and steel. The inside re-arranged and suited to our comfort, but still very much a reminder of the age old rule the town had; if it’s unsightly, store it away. We felt a kinship with the place and when the world turned its back on us; we sank away into the guts of this beast.
There was a cut on the feed and it skipped ahead some time later when we were all sat around what we called “The Green Room”, several old velvet couches and some make-up tables lined the dusty room, the wood-rotted floorboards threatening to give way at any moment. Mathias sat in an old wicker chair, rocking back and forth, pretending he was a prospector and fake-spitting at the end of every sentence, the group delighting in the spectacle.
“Y’know, I heard a legend about this place…” Livewire spoke up, sat across both armrests of an oxblood recliner. “Supposedly, this was all shut down due to an issue with the manager. Dude went crazy and broke protocol, shot his entire staff before turning the gun on himself. They said the building was totally unusable after that, that it was straight up haunted.” He snorted, back flipping off the chair and calling out in his most melodic voice “bullshit”.
“I mean, there’s one way we could find out. None of us have ever stayed the night here.” Mathias remarked, rocking back gently and waxing poetically. "Legend has it that if a soul spends a hallowed eve here, they'll never be the same. But you..." He points a shaky finger at Livewire for dramatic effect. "You have that live spark that could manage it!"
The group chuckles as Livewire scratches the back of his head, uncertain.
"I dunno guys, I get distracted easily and this place isn't exactly "safe" y'know? How do we know it'll be okay?"
We chanted his name, clapping and stomping as he began nodding and moving to the beat, psyching himself up.
"C'mon Dallas, you're the fearless one! You can do ANYTHING!" Preston said, genuine admiration in his voice.
"Hell yeah, I bet you could climb the ladder at the top of the building and hang your shoes over the powerlines!" Warren cried, pumping his fist in the air. "THAT'S top tier shit right there.
Younger me turned to Tristan as they're discussing the feat, a tinge of nervousness in my voice.
"Do you think that's safe? I mean, obviously it's NOT, but you know what I mean."
"Dude, the power to this building has been dead for a long time, that's why we have that big ass generator Mathias got us. The power lines definitely don't run anymore. You can do it man!"
The camera cuts to Millie, leaning against the wall and shaking her head, she looks uncomfortable but doesn't protest.
"Hm... Well, fuck it! Been a while since we did anything crazy and maybe this'd get me worked up to stay the night!" he rolled forward and jumped up, hair flopping as we clapped. "Call it marking my territory!"
Millie: I hated everything about this, still do.
Preston: Why didn't you say anything at the time? We'd have listened.
Millie: C'mon, group mentality combined with his infectious personality and daredevil mentality? I'd have just been bringing everyone down.
Warren: I get that, you didn't feel comfortable. But it sounds like you thought you didn't fit in with us.
Millie: Because at that point, I didn't. A misfit amongst the misfits. A fuckup beyond fuckups. It's not like I was proud of it, but...
Fay: I get it, you didn't wanna make waves or let your guard down too much, even at this point. I'm sorry.
She shrugged and didn't take her eyes off the screen.
Millie: Yeah, me too. Believe me.
00:30 - The camera is panned upwards towards the second floor, a makeshift bedroom we'd used for naps that housed little more than a faded mattress and a mirrored closet we kept snacks in. By the upper landing, there was a small metallic ladder leading some 15ft up onto the roof where the power-lines hung overhead. The rest of the group stood outside as Fay got an establishing shot before hurriedly running outside to join them.
The sky was clear, but the air was thick and the summer heat was bearing down on us. Some clouds lurking in the distance, far away from the cliff and bearing no real threat. At the time, the worst we thought may happen is sheer heat exhaustion.
But as Livewire climbed up and hooked his leg underneath one of the last steps as a safety measure while he threw his shoes over the line, the following moments would betray that.
We knew Livewire was easily swayed by others and that his daredevil attitude came as a habit of wanting to impress even when he didn't need to, we'd done it many times before without major incident. But he often took things too far of his own accord, emboldened by the excitement and cheers.
In this case, when he successfully got his shoes over the power-lines and we erupted with cheers, he decided to go a step further.
He pulled on the wires to prove they weren't active.
There was a spark, his body tensed up and smoke erupted from his body and for whatever reason, maybe even shock, I kept my camera unflinchingly on him as he sizzled and gurgled while our younger selves screamed.
After a few seconds, his body fell limp and we watched in horror as the once steadfast leg locked into the bar slipped out and he plummeted to the floor below, the sickening thud sending shockwaves through us and making us rush to him as the camera blurs and cuts out.
Millie: Even now, that's horrifying to look back on, the sound of his shock and even the smell of his body...
Warren: Makes me wanna dry heave, but not as much as what we did after seeing him like that.
Preston: Yeah, I'm not sure I wanna see it again.
Fay: I know, but we're going to.
Millie: We need to.
Preston: Yeah, we have to...
00:45 - The camera cuts to feet dashing through the trail as frantic voices call out to one another. Thunder and lightning can be heard rolling in as they get further and further away.
“Fuck… FUCK! WHY DID WE LEAVE HIM?!” Warren was bent over, dry heaving and punching his head.
“Because he was fucking DEAD, Warren. We’ve got to focus on what we do now. How we cover this up.” Mathias looked back at the house and Fay zoomed in on him through shaky hands. He looked resolved, distant.
“Cov- Cover it up? We have to fucking TELL someone!” Millie was shaking, pulling at the ends of her sleeves nervously, looking around at the group as they looked away, shamefully. “… Right?”
There was a pause, Warren speaking first.
“I already fucked up once, it cost me everything. I can’t fuck up again, guys. I can't do that to my mom... I'm all she has.” He clenched his fists and looked down, rain falling and causing his mohawk to flatten. “Do whatever you have to, I’m out.”
He walked off, Preston a few feet behind him, tears in his eyes and shaking his head.“I know we did wrong, but I have a good future… I can’t let this get in the way. If he's gone, he's gone.” He sighed. “I hate myself for saying that, but what else can we do?”
Millie stood there, indignant. “Tell the truth. We can tell the fucking truth!”
“That would cause more harm than good, Millie. We’d ALL go down for it and I don’t think any of us can handle that.” Fay called from behind the camera, fear breaking her voice as she spoke. “We were never meant to be here, what happened to him was our fault. If we tell someone, it could so easily come back on us. None of us were supposed to be out, we knew he had a propensity to go too far and we pushed him… fuck…” Tristan pinched the bridge of his nose and breathed heavily, Fay putting out a hand to comfort him, but Millie getting there first and hugging him tight, whispering something to him. She lingered for a moment on the shot of the two of them before putting the camera down to her feet as they walked away, cutting to black.
Millie: All that anger didn’t do much in the end, did it? Mathias was right, we were cowards and we deserve some kind of justice.
Warren: Maybe, but we were just kids. What were we supposed to do? The guy was dead.
Fay: No, he wasn’t.
I took a deep breath and tried to put my mind in a safer place, remembering better times, fun birthdays and meaningful songs.
I was about to see him again.
01:55 - The camera switches on, it’s the dead of night and Tristan trudges up the hill, panting and seemingly anxious. The moon hangs high overhead, a singular luminous eye following his trajectory and I swear I can see ripples around it, as if something is stirring in the infinite void, black clouds could be seen in the distance. Like it knows why he’s come back.
He stops short of going through the large steel door, letting the camera linger while catching his breath.
“I know this is stupid, I know everything about what I’m going to do is stupid. Breaking in, filming… what happens next, but…”
He turns the camera towards his face, a far more youthful Tristan staring back as my stomach contacts and I feel a sharp pang rip through my heart.
My baby brother.
“I can’t do this. I need to know if… if he’s… and if he is, I need to do the right thing. Then, I’ll take the tape to the Sheriffs county, or leak it online or… or… I don’t know, I just need to make sure that if someone has to pay for this… it’s me.” He pauses again, eyes welling up with tears before he tries to crack a smile. “Who knows? Maybe ol’ Livewire is pulling a prank, and he’s totally fine, ready to punk me. Maybe it’s not so bad and we can laugh this off when he’s better!” This last pause has his lips trembling, breathing heavily and holding back sobs as he swallows. “But if he’s as bad as I think he is, if it’s beyond help… I’ll make sure the right thing is done. For him. For us.”
He wipes his eyes and sniffs deep, shaking his head slightly before nodding and turning the camera back to the door, the key clunking in the old lock before giving way as he gingerly opens it, careful not to make too much noise.
The camera points down, but we know where he’s going, what he’s seeing.
A charred spot from so many days prior, the entire building shrouded in darkness. What was once our safe haven now just an imposing structure with lingering death. Dried blood caking the rotted wood and fell through the cracks to the floor below. The floor lined with scratches in the floorboards where someone had dug their nails in, dragging themselves desperately to safety, food or maybe even help. He followed it to the adjacent room, and the camera shook for a moment, lingering on the imposing frame leading to where Livewire lay.
The camera panned up, and we saw the charred, still living remains of Dallas “Livewire” Mendoza. His flesh charred in places and his body frail, malnourished and sickly. If he noticed Tristan coming in, he didn’t show it. Breathing softly, the exhalation like that of rusty bellows, Tristan put the camera on the floor beside him as he knelt at Livewire’s side, sobbing.
Millie: So he wasn’t lying… Oh, Tristan… Why?
Warren: He felt the same thing we all did, that immense guilt that we did something wrong. Amplified by the idea that maybe he was okay, just needed some extra help, but…
Preston: But he didn’t account on how bad it was. Fuck, why did he do this on his own?
Fay: Because he wanted to protect us all, he felt it was his words that sealed Livewires fate and so it was his responsibility to go back. I had tears in my eyes as we watched the footage, my twin and better half a broken boy trying to do what was right. This dismal room letting in no light, a small makeshift bed of discarded clothes and magazines we’d read on kinder days now propping up only part of Livewire’s body, a disused wardrobe with a filthy mirror covered in large smudges laying in the corner. This was where Livewire had spent the last few days of his life, and the crippling loneliness of that moment crushed me entirely.
Warren: Well, we know what happens next. Should I turn it off? He got up to reach for the remote and pause, but I put a gentle hand on his, shaking my head.
Fay: We watch it in full, we owe it to Tristan…and to Dallas.The group nodded solemnly and we continued watching, all of us sat forward with our hands ringing together.
There was only one thing left.
02:00 - After some time, Tristan slung the backpack he’d been carrying off of his back and pulled out a couple of items; a prized copy of smash bros. melee that he & Livewire had spent countless hours beating each other senseless on, a pair of coins, a photo we’d taken of the group some weeks prior…
And a pillow.
Placing all the items by his side, tears still running down his face, Tristan grabbed the pillow and looked into Livewires face one last time. The shallow, pained breathing unchanged.
“I’m so, so sorry, Dallas.” He whispered, before pushing the pillow onto his face.
There are few things we have witnessed in this world that match the sheer horror of watching a friend, a loved one, a sibling commit murder, even if it’s a mercy killing. Tristan never stopped weeping, he didn’t lose focus or become violent, but he held his grip tight as the already weak struggles from Dallas grew weaker as the seconds dragged into minutes.
But it was what we saw in the mirror that cemented our fear, steeled our resolve, and brought our anger to fresh heights.
That huge, unsightly smudge in the mirror was not a smudge.
It was a person, holding themselves up in the door frame behind Tristan and gleefully swinging like a child at the park.
It was Mathias. A deranged, younger, joyful Mathias stood over one of his best friends and, like the most depraved peeping tom, leered at the sight of the murder. His hair normally pinned back in a neat bun, now wild and greasy, covering his face and painting a far less composed individual. He simply swung in place as Tristan held the pillow down long after Dallas stopped moving before leaning over his friend and sobbing harder, apologising profusely. After a few moments, he placed the coins on his eyes, put the pendant over his neck and laid the game on his chest.
He was giving him a proper burial.
Millie: How in the fuck did Mathias know all this and NEVER say anything? Didn’t he say he felt guilty before?
Fay: Yeah, his desire to put this all into motion was because he felt we deserved to be punished for what happened to livewi- to Dallas, that our lies had consumed us and what we did warranted justice.
Warren: How that creepy fuck got away with it is beyond me though, wouldn’t Tristan have noticed him there?
Preston shook in his seat and when we turned to him, we saw that same fear he’d shown during his own show “Name That Anomaly”.
Preston: It’s just like last time, this isn’t real.
His hands shook, and he pointed before adding;
“Watch”.
02:05 - Once Tristan had finished, the form of Mathias silently let his body drop to the floor before standing up and tiptoeing across the room and towards Tristan. His hands raised and fingers gnarled into claws, he looked ready to pull at any appendage Tristan had within his reach. But, just as he reached out, Tristan moved and picked up the camera to leave.
When he turned it back towards the doorway, there was nothing there.
I couldn’t tell you if Tristan had sensed something or if it was just timing, but he sighed for a moment before putting his backpack on and preparing to leave the building. As he did, the sounds of thunder and lightning could be heard overhead. He muttered a curse before the thunder clap scared him enough to drop the camera. We get a shot of him stumbling back and staring up at something as the lightning strikes and the whole building is illuminated.
On every wall, every piece of furniture and every previously unseen speck of wood was writing. Red writing.
“YOUR TURN.” lined the walls over and over.
A spark had been set and the red glow of the fire rose up in front of Tristan and across the stairs rapidly, the rotting wood providing excellent kindling for the hungry blaze to consume.
Dumbstruck, Tristan reached for the camera before seeing the blaze rip through the foundations and running for the door, most likely cutting his losses that the footage would be gone.
This was the night our hideout burned down and many of us, though terrified and still guilt-ridden, breathed a sigh of relief.
The shot lingered on the door as he ran out; the image flickering as the flames drew closer before the camera was raised from the floor and picked up, zooming in on Tristan as he ran away.
“Run away from your guilt, wallow in your shame, our time will come, they’ll know our name.” The voice cooed.
The camera switched to the scorched face of JJ as his flesh melted, the beams dropping from the ceiling and crashing into the wood, the red signs declaring “YOUR TURN” beginning to glow, almost throbbing in the light.
“Here’s the beginning, now we have the end. Mantis Reach. Tonight.”
His smile grew as teeth blackened, fell out and black blood flowed down his face, filling his mouth as images of the older footage inter spliced rapidly, the fires consuming his face as images of all of us laughing together played.
A young Millie showing off her lucky cat’s paw, brand new and accompanying a box of dead animals she was studying, much to the group’s disgust.
His smile stayed wide, the lips peeling.
Preston bringing foods he’d baked with his mom, Tristan nudging Fay and whispering something before the both of them warmly smiled and nodded.
His eyes sank into their sockets, the white flesh bubbling and melting, running down his face.
Warren, head banging to a record and flailing like a madman as we clapped, laughed and eventually joined in.
His hair singed, falling out in clumps as the scalp reddened and split. Something behind him stirs in the smoke.
Tristan and Fay imitating the fusion dance and operating as a multi-limbed being, speaking in unison and heartily laughing.
The figure behind him moves closer, awkwardly dragging its limbs in and out of focus.
Mathias hooking up a projector so the gang could play Mario Kart together, the whole group thanking him and patting his back. He looked genuinely overwhelmed.
The corpse of Dallas moved into view and stood beside JJ as the two continued to melt.
The final image being that of Dallas and Mathias standing shoulder to shoulder in the archived footage alongside Dallas & JJ’s fetid corpses, a pair of raspy voices echoing as the camera footage grew twisted and corrupted before shutting off.
“Upon Mantis Reach, you will look Beneath The Static. One last time.”
We sat in silence for a long time, no dramatic vomit, screaming or shouting. Just deafening silence as we processed it in our own way. Maybe we were just desensitised after so long and seeing so much, I don’t know. But the calm was unnerving for us all. We were hoping for some kind of large, Earth shattering revelation.
But instead, we simply had our guilt laid bare as well as confirming what I think we all knew; Tristan took the ultimate sacrifice for us.
Warren: Well, I guess we know what we have to do next, right?
He stood up, stretched and sighed, hunching his shoulders.
Preston: We have to go back. But isn’t the place gone? What else could be there now?
Millie: I think it’s more than that. I think we need to face this head on, whatever it is. We need to come to terms with what happened as well as acknowledging our part in this. I don’t know about you, but I want to sleep well at night all the time, not some of the time.
We nodded, but I felt a sickness I hadn’t felt since that day.
Preston: What if we don’t make it out? What if whatever is there takes us all one by one?
Fay: Well, then we’ll die knowing we did the right thing. Even if it’s over a decade too late.
We hugged for what felt like an eternity, the bonds between us all still strong and I swear I could feel someone’s hands on my shoulders, those of the people we left behind.
Setting off later that night, we arrived at the cordoned off dirt trail leading to Mantis Reach, a slew of messages from “CONDEMNED” to telling us to stay away under penalty of law. We clipped open the gate and trudged up the trail, no laptop to dictate but instead a nifty dictaphone Millie brought with her from work.
Millie: We use it all the time for patient reports, figured it may come in handy.
When we reached the summit and stared at the spot where our hideout had once stood, the gravity and finality of the situation hit us all like a freight train. There was no storm, no heavy rain, no ominous backdrop to greet us.
But there was a building.
It towered into the sky, several floors high. Some with blacked-out windows and other glowing with a faint purple light. A broadcast tower attached to the roof and a neon sign latched to the side of the building as we heard the glass doors beep and slide open for us.
It was a broadcast station and as that name flashed at me; I felt a chill run through my bones.
This was it.
“Beneath The Static.”
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good online furniture stores uk video

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