Charity Casino Night • Fundraiser Insight

This text was originally posted in Mauerstrassenwetten by u/knutolee. I thought his message was so powerful that I asked him for permission to translate, post (can share chat with Mod if required or check directly with him) and fuck his wife (ok didn’t ask for permission) after and he agreed to all most of this wholeheartedly – like a true Autist. I am trying to catch the message – so don’t expect a word by word translation as you can never catch the greatness of the text in it’s entirety and I got to translate it in a way that even a US degenerate can follow it.
As usual no financial advice, I more or less just copied the text because I liked the text and I like the share. In general I have likely lost more than I won and the stock market is a mystery in itself to me. So make your own due dilligence and don’t trust financial advice of others (the argument for that you can read to a certain extent below).
Autists, Degenerates, Idiocracy of the World – let me get this straight!
In the coming days I don’t wanna see all this whining and bitching on this sub and espescially in the daily GME threads anymore. On every fucking corner of this sub I smell doubt, you read messages the likes of „this is over“, „we missed the squeeze“, „I am going to loose it all“, „entered at 320$ - I am doomed“. What the fuck is wrong with you retards, did you fucking wanker your wifes boyfriend dick all night and lost your mind over the effort to do so? I think I got to get this accross the Buddy Stephens way to get you down to fucking earth and get your attitude right.
1) You come to a sub called wallstreetbets and yolo your hard earned money in $GME
You realize what you are doing here - you true fuck - dont you? This is a community of full blown first class true tits up degenerates which take pleasure in posting losses accumulating into the millions every fucking month and you are putting your money into a BET – yes my dear it is written out in the name of this very fucking sub Wallstreet-B-E-T-S!!! – and follow DD posted by people with names like „SHOW_ME_YOUR_ANAL_TITS“? You realize this is not a fucking Disney ferry „One-Wish-comes-true“ show and we see all day long gain porn and loss porn is something which doesn’t exist in this world? This is a band of true autists which occupied an absolute niche when it comes down to trading (and we even don’t trade stocks normally!). This is the place where one wants to enjoy the sado-masochistic part of the retarded capitalistic system we are living in. Yes we have some (maybe a lot) DD diamonds in this sub which by the way are now impossible to find because you degenerate fucks spam the entire system to the moon but no sane long-term investor would consider to invest into any of these investments – this is about „get rich or die trying!“. This is not investing!
2) Yeah but I saw Reddit in the news and all that stuff about GME and it was going through the roof becasue there is going to be short squeeze and on top of it the hedge funds fucked up, hihihi
If this entire thing was a safe bet why exactly would not the fucking entire world jump on this train? (and even you might get this image from all this „Saudi Arabia calling, China calling, Africa calling posts – but please they invest into BABA, Aramco or I don’t know what’s the hot shit in Lagos stock exchange right now – could be though the next big thing – got to see if I can find a DD on this). So why is this not happening? Because it is a fucking BET – the stock market is a fucking Casino and the major difference between investing and us is that they are always just bet on black or red, while we always go for the magical zero. It is totally unclear whether all of us going to show up at Miami Beach with our Porsche Cayenne or Tesla Model S and hit on the girls (or boys) on the beach! The reasons are layed out to you every fucking day with yet another quality DD that most of us simply dont understand! And yes our chances to already sit on the fucking moon slurping our Pinha Coladas would be certainly higher if everything was going the way we believe the system should be working but even the last person who joined this sub by now should realize – you are potentially fucking with the system itself (by the way something this sub never intentionally wanted and you shouldn’t do if you like the system).
3) Hey but when is the squeeze of the squoze going to happen? 😓
So there is this story going through the media and from Florida to Colorado everybody remotely degenerate is yoloing money into GME. It’s a fucking global movement now (or not – could be also the same 50.000 degenerates cheering up themselves the entire time which would much better fit this place) and according to the DD we just need to have 🙌💎and the shorts a bleeding their panties, their balls feel squozen (and not in a good way) and they are completely in defensive mode. What do you think what people who are responsible for Multi-billion $$$ HF are going to do? How do you think you become a person who is responsible for such an operation? Do you think these guys have served as altar boys or girls in church (no offense if so)? What is wrong with you? Seriously! Do you think if they get some headwind they are going to say: Oh boy – we got defeated and going to realize a multi-fucking-billion-to-the-moon loss? OF COURSE FUCKING NOT! THEY WILL GET EVERY FUCKING BAZOOKA, TANK, ROCKET or INTER-STELLAR DEFENSE SYSTEM IN PLACE TO BRING THIS TO AN END! Influence the market participants (speculation), Short-Laddar attacks (I to this very day haven’t understand the concept or how this works – speculation), demotivational tactics (speculation) and to whomever picks it up – desinformation (well not quite speculation but it could also be that media is just retarded as fuck to get the most simple facts straight). So what would you do with a potential group of 5mn small-size investors – shall we do a collective effort to think about it? Ah fuck it! It is to fucking obvious – you would dry this out through time, divide their interests and drive away their attention. Because let’s be fucking honest – most of you entered this thinking you would hold this wonderful stock for a couple of days (and to be honest in this respect the community how it existed 10 days ago was much more true to itself - no whining just sayin)! Gotcha! Who can tell me who fucked each other two weeks ago in People magazin or on Twitter? Nobody – I even don’t remember shit about this very forum before GME (ok I remember u/variation-separate but that is another story). And all their tactics are completely understandable because there is a fucking huge amount of tendies to be made and they are not that different from us (my fear).
4) That does not give you the fucking right to whine and bitch all the time in the daily threads (and it is not happening already its going to be) and fucking ruin the party
Deal with it – we just got to wait how this thing plays out. That’s it. If we are right – this will play out positively in one or another way (huge tendies or SEC investigating). Let them continue shorting the stock or whatever. If you believe you want to buy more stock – do your DD and do it. When this got picked up a long time ago by people they thought – hmmmm makes sense – I am going to get me one of these tickets to the moon. There was if at all a very little interest to squoze the balls of any HF and it was certainly not the main motivation of this sub. I said it above: Get rich or die tryin! Since last Thursday the whole thing became political and it looks like rules were changed in our disfavour and yeah we can not go back in time but we got to deal with it and the circumstances. [Left out this part as it promotes holding and buying which I don’t want to in the sense that everybody needs to make his own fucking decision but I am going to fucking hold] but WE NEED TO REGAIN OUR POSITIVE SPIRIT which was an essential part of this sub and GME for most part in January (and of course in general before) – no matter how fucked up things looked (individually as there is not such a thing as collective alignment to buy options or stocks on this forum). We will see how the numbers are play out and who provided the adequate picture. In our reality GME is going to the moon and the 🚀 is fueled. Period. We are just prevented from starting because of the windy conditions out there.
So please – no post without 🙌💎🙌💎🙌💎🚀🚀🚀 and if you want to fukn leave the party – leave – but let us continue this party, because we are going to the fkn moon. This is the way and I fkn love GME and if this means I need to hold onto this beauty for another 25 years I am going to do it.
P.S.: One thing dear to my heart - in the past there has been huge donations made by this community to people living with autism. As we use their names every fkn day I would really like to see some of your degenerates not to forget about this cause because we owe them and as much as I like the billboards I’d rather see every $$$ go into charities rather then telling the world about us – I think everybody out there knows by now that we exist and that we have 🙌💎
Edit: Nobody asked for it but 35@231,69 and thanks for the awards which should go to u/knutolee - so you can simply award his original post referenced. More importantly he expressed to me that he is very happy with the translation which is almost as important as the message itself.
Edit 2: Please pay attention to AMA Marc Cuban - https://www.reddit.com/wallstreetbets/comments/lawubt/hey_everyone_its_mark_cuban_jumping_on_to_do_an/ - there is I think some quite enlighting answers in a very easy to understand language.
Edit 3: Bought 5@103
Edit 4: Heading for dinner. Crazy times. Will check later and decide whether to buy more tickets or not. But maybe good advice for some others to make a break. Chillax :)
Edit 5: Read that RH has opened up GME again. For whatever it's worth 🚀
Edit 6: Thanks again for all the Awards and stuff. I can only reload in the morning. Was fun and maybe I am going to translate more in the future - if mods would consider to give me a copy cat 😺 flair it would be the icing on the cake.
Edit 7: Obligatory salute to the one and only DFV and his 💎 balls. This guy will go all the way to the 🚀 with us.

I think we're all aware by now of the conspiracy that's building in the background of 2077. Most of us know about the mysterious Blue Eyes who appears in The Sun ending to the game. He operates as The Stinger of sorts for (that) ending of the game; He and V discuss a job vaguely alluded to through out the ending sequence and then the ending cuts to V in space charging off towards The Crystal Palace. Cue DLC Hook and credits.
But, let's go back here. This is only the tail end of the conspiracy and where it actually intersects with V's story. Blue Eyes (and some connections to him) crop up multiple times through out the game and, when pieced together, start building a larger picture that runs deeper into Night City than the pockets of most corporats.
I've finished my second playthrough of the game and I've been drafting this post as I play and find more clues. I doubt I'll find everything or might completely dismiss some, but I want to be on the front lines of uncovering this mystery, especially if this will be our Gaunter O'Dim for Cyberpunk 2077. I apologize for the length of this post ahead of time, but I need to summarize a bunch of lore and at least 4 major side-quests; "I Fought The Law", "Dream On", "Full Disclosure", and "The Prophet's Song".
Here's a long essay incoming, but I hope you chooms enjoy and I hope you read through to the end because, oh boy, I uncovered some cool shit!
So, who is Blue Eyes? Who are his contacts? What is his role in the ecosystem of this city?
"I FOUGHT THE LAW"
Let's start with where he most appears in the game; Jefferson and Elizabeth Peralez, political family in the running for Night City's first family. Which I kinda have to summarize their questlines, including the first one which Blue Eyes never appears in. But I'd prefer to go in chronological order and not jump around, so stick with me.
Elizabeth first contacts you for the job "I Fought The Law". It's fairly basic, but the quest tells us she convinced her husband to hire V to look into the recent death of Mayor Rhyne. We get a BD of a cyberpsycho attack by Peter Horvath on Mayor Rhyne. Weldon Holt leaves the room before the attack and then the security gate crashes right before Peter walks in with billions of eddies worth of chrome. The attack is unsuccessful and stopped by Detective River Ward, who was only there because Peter went missing internally at the NCPD and he knew where Peter would go.
When investigating Peter Horvath, his previous boss describes him as paranoid that "probably thought Mayor Rhyne talked to him through the TV" and that the world was out to fuck him. She then mentions that someone "finally saw what he was worth" which cues into how Peter was thrown into this attack in the first place; he had a patron who funded his chrome and the attempt on Rhyne's life. Tellingly, River than goes into a little talk about how clues rarely make sense until put into the larger context, much like we're doing right now.
V goes to the club Rhyne died in; The Red Queen's Race. V sneaks through, takes out some Animals, and can investigate what actually happened to Rhyne. If we read the emails on the office terminal, we know that Weldon Holt arranged for Rhyne to be there. He initially mentioned this to Rhyne during the first BD; Rhyne asked Holt directly to arrange his usual room at the club. So, this doesn't inherently look too suspicious on it's own, but Holt knew where Rhyne would be. We also find out via the Animals Boss there that Weldon Holt is the one who hired them to smash up the club and they're currently waiting around for payment. Further, you can go to the room Rhyne died in, find the BD headset, and put it on... which INSTANTLY knocks V out and they need to be rescued by River (who, btw, takes out any Animals on the property you didn't get to! Ty bro!). They surmise that Rhyne was killed by a virus in the headset. Lastly, we find footage of Detective Han (River's partner) covering up the death of Rhyne. They confront Han, V goes off to the Peralezs, and quest ends.
Of note, finding the BD set is a hidden dialogue option with the Peralezes suggesting, yes, that's the correct deduction to make. You don't get that option otherwise. And V never actually comes to any real conclusion to what happened to Rhyne.
So, let's summarize what we know about the death of our Mayor. Peter Horvath was hired by an unknown Patron who spent a ton of money to turn him into a suicide bomb against Rhyne. They have connections internally to the corrupt NCPD which allowed Horvath to get access to Rhyne, both from escaping NCPD custody and for the security to give him access to Rhyne's conference room. That fails so our mastermind instead assassinates Rhyne at his usual sex club, one that we know for sure Holt knew about. Rhyne is assassinated via malware in a BD porno headset, NCPD comes in an Detective Han cleans it up. Later, Holt hires the Animals to take claim to the club and fuck it up.
Holt is looking suspicious AF rn, but we also don't have any direct evidence and V says as much if you accuse him. Personally, I think it's a little too clumsy if it's him. Holt leaves the room just as an assassination attempt goes down, sets up a sex club appointment for the Mayor where he's successfully assassinated, NCPD covers it up... and then he hires a gang to cover it up more? Something doesn't fit here.
My theory is Holt is innocent. He's a scum bag, but not the culprit here. Why would you EVER give your identity to the Animals you hired to cover up an assassination? The big dumb brutes of the underworld? A name they give up with almost no fight? No, I think someone hired them under Holt's name. And I think they hired them because they KNEW the BD Headset was left behind; Han dismissed it entirely as Rhyne dying of a heart attack brought on during sex. They needed that destroyed to cover the final footprints. It's the only piece of evidence that doesn't have Holt or NCPD's name on it and doesn't fit the narrative that both are pushing. If they're covering NCPD or Holt's tracks, why not delete the emails or footage of Han? And if Holt or Han were trying to push this false narrative, why leave the headset right there the first time?
And, while I have no evidence of this assertion, the Animals are only still there because they're waiting for payment to come in... I think our employer never intended to pay them and left them in the path of V, who is likely to shoot them and tie up the loose end for our mysterious entity. Animals destroy the BD set, V shoots the animals, no trace. And, even if he doesn't, Animals will point V to the wrong person.
No, we've got a third party here. But let's continue so we can finally let our lead actor take center stage.
"DREAM ON"
"Dream On" starts when Jefferson calls V and asks them to help in another case. Long and Short; Jefferson woke up in the night and found a man in a mask (or an implant) standing over him. Jefferson shot the man, only for his head to fry and knock him out. Coming to, he's back in bed with no evidence it ever happened. SSI, their private security, insists that there was nothing on the cameras, no evidence, and nothing happened. Elizabeth claims she slept through the whole thing event.
V investigates the apartment, with Elizabeth giving the tour, and finds a lot of evidence. Elizabeth is kinda dismissive at first thinking V won't find much. First small stuff leading into larger reveals. Let's start small and work our way up.
First room Liz takes us to is the campaign room. She talks about running the campaign entirely out of pocket and having to keep most of their supplies at the Penthouse; "It's cheaper that way". You find a picture of their daughter on the wall and Liz explains that she's off at university in Europe while Jefferson is running for office; "It's easier that way" she says. That phrasing again.
EDIT: A redditor in the comments pointed out that the Peralez are being controlled via drugs in their food as part of the tech. They mention they've been eating fast food lately, explaining why Jefferson was lucid enough to catch the agent and shoot him.
V can look at Jefferson's emails (which Liz slightly discourages them, saying there's nothing there) which reveals a bit more about their campaign. There's a video of the iconic commercial and poster of Jefferson pulling out a gun and shooting a bunch of paperwork. In the email, Jefferson HATES this commercial, but his assistant, Lea Patel, insists on it as it will air in television time slots with action-drama series and catch the attention of voters. Further emails have Eric Boucher, Jefferson's Campaign Partner (Manager?), saying Jefferson has been acting unpredictably lately; presumably referencing one of the next emails. Boucher is confused because they fired Lea Patel together, only for her to continue working and sent him a new ad for approval. When emailed, Jefferson is confused about Lea being fired at all and doesn't remember the event ever happening, even telling Boucher to be honest if he has some issue with her. A final email is from SSI Chief of Security, Wallace, discussing Jefferson's intent to hire a merc to look into Rhyne's death ("Dream On") and they suggest Jefferson drop it or have NCPD or themselves look into it. Private Security just... offering to investigate the former mayor's death? Huh... sounds more like they want to squash the issue to me.
We should now talk about the Peralez's campaign. As you explore the apartment, Liz explains that they're running on a corp free campaign; they want to get Night City out of the control of the corps and do so without ever owing any favors to them. She specifically cites "Night Corp, Militech, and Petrochem" as ones they've denied. Militech and Petrochem come up a few times in other quests but Night Corp is relatively obscure. And they choose that corp to be the first one she mentions? Stands out to me. It also isn't lost on me that we're talking about running a campaign out of pocket and refusing corp assistance... while walking on the fancy ass balcony of a penthouse in Charter Hill- North Oak.
Next room, we find Jefferson's office. Elizabeth and Jefferson both graduated with law degrees from Asukaga University in Berkley. V points out it would be extremely expensive for them both, but Elizabeth says that both got full ride scholarships from the Richard Night Foundation, run by Night Corp. To further fucking cement this moment, there's a Richard Night biography shard on the desk. But we'll drop this for now because I want to get to Night Corp a bit later.
The computer on the office desk has some emails on it sent by Elizabeth. One is between her and Judy where she's asking Judy for help on the original "I Fought The Law" quest and Judy is the one who gave her your contact in the first place. Another is from their daughter kinda asserting the same thing earlier; safer for her in Europe so she's not a target on the campaign trail. And here's the interesting one; Boucher emailed Elizabeth asking why Jefferson changed his mind on Lea Patel. Elizabth says Jefferson explained it to her that it "slipped his mind" and "circumstances changed in Lea's favor" and she asks him to drop the whole thing. She's dismissive and gives extremely vague details.
Next room, Bedroom. Elziabeth's gun is on the table. It's the one Jefferson claimed he fired and scanning it tells us that it has been fired recently. We also find the wedding photo of Jefferson and Elizabeth where she fondly talks about having blue roses because she loves them so much... except the photo's roses are red and V says as much. Elizabeth quietly corrects herself that they only had red roses instead and moves on.
In the hall, we find the blood trail and gun shots in the wall; both covered up hastily. Following the trail, we enter a tv room. The Smart Glass isn't working and Elizabeth says it stopped working recently; not like they use it much anyway. Passing a Tech Check lets us try and fix it... only to be quickly blacked out by it so hard Johnny felt it too. V asks Elizabeth about it but she doesn't know what V is talking about despite having been standing right there. We also find a hidden door in the wall. Unlike earlier, Liz is actually confused by the door but demands V try and open it.
Downstairs we have the security room. Liz says that it used to be her place but "Security had to set up somewhere" and that she had to make sacrifices for this campaign; "it wasn't the first nor will it be the last". One computer has a Welcome email from SSI to new recruits. It details that they have access to all areas except Section Zero, which is reserved for Blue or Black agents and that, should the encounter a Blue or Black Agent (SPECIFICALLY "in the night"), do not interact or acknowledge them. The next email from Wallace mentions an accident where there was a "behavioral anomaly" and "ALPHA" injured a Blue Agent (BLUE-66M) who is in critical and the SSI head is requesting access to Sector Zero to give medical aid. SSI gives Wallace the code to Sector Zero and sends a team to aid. SSI knew about the accident and lied. You go to the second computer, unlock it, and can unlock the upstairs door. On that terminal is a bunch of deleted files (presumably the security footage from that night) and emails discussing "normal maintenance procedure" and further informing security that ALPHA (Jefferson) hired a merc (V) and, should security encounter them, do not interact with them.
Small thing I found interesting, a shard called "You Are What You Slot" is found down here too. It details a fictional assassin who kills and then steals the identity of her victims. Small and doesn't mean much on it's own, but the shards are hinting at the story here; one of false identities and manipulation.
Now, let's get to the main event; the secret room. Inside is a control center. Elizabeth is horrified and feels violated. She shouts that she's not letting SSI anywhere near them, only for her head to start hurting and she tells V to do what he needs to do. She leaves him. Inside the control room is a box of bloody medical supplies. The computer discusses "behavioral norms" for ALPHA (Jefferson) and suggests amplifying "neural dampening". It discusses things similar to Wallace's terminal, but from the other side; ALPHA is displaying odd behavior by hiring a merc, the SSI teams avoided meeting the merc, and then the actual accident that occurred injuring BLUE-66M during regular 'maintenance'. The other side of the room also has another data shard, "Rewriting Synaptic Pathways", basically talking about using tech to rewire the brain a bit.
Following some wires from the control room to the roof, we find a signal dish. Johnny (replacing Elizabeth for conversation now that she's gone), joins in that the tech looks prehistoric but functional and that Militech used it in the war; it requires line of sight to transmit data but otherwise can't be intercepted. We can see the tower and go to investigate. V tells Liz the whole deal; V can suggest that the Van near the tower could be SSIs or that it might not be due to unconventional tech. Liz then itterates twice that it's a stressful campaign time for Jefferson and V should talk to her, NOT him. "Sure, whatever" V and the player dismiss.
(I SWEAR WE'RE ALMOST DONE WITH THE SUMMARIZING FOR DREAM ON, I'M SO SORRY.)
We drive after the van, Johnny is suddenly excited for smashing a corpo conspiracy and iterates that citizens do not choose their representatives, instead they're chosen by "key players" who watch the Peralezes for weaknesses or blackmail material. We arrive at the facility patrolled by Maelstrom and the occupants of our van park, get out, and climb ladders to the roof where they get into an AV that is cloaked to be near invisible (as shown in a couple of vids on YouTube and this subreddit).
At the place, Maelstom is explained; "UNKNOWN USER" contacted them while driving the van for protection to take care of V and then destroy the van. Van's data makes it pretty clear; the Peralezs' minds are being manipulated, new neural pathways are being created, and their memories are being created, changed, or erased. There are also a couple of other names of other test subjects. The data is then erased. We do see an almost flower like symbol before the data is destroyed.
The agents on the cloaked AV CAN be killed and do drop a shard, thought it doesn’t have many more details, merely that they’re contacting HQ to arrange extraction and that the Van’s data should be destroyed and echoing the arrangement with Maelstrom mentioned earlier in their shards.
V calls Liz, Liz wants to meet in person instead of over holo and send him to a Japantown Raman shop (same one that used to be Rainbow Cadenza, coincidentally). Odd choice for an upstanding congresswoman. She says her nerves are shot, the ramen shop is a quieter place to meet than the apartment, and she needs a moment to gather herself since she last saw V, with V even asking if something has happened since they last saw each other. Of note, Liz is stress smoking the entire scene, something she hasn't done until now. She then explains, no, it's been over a longer period of time. She's been watching her husband change and act differently for awhile; he stopped reading, his taste changed, and he even insisted he was an only child and never had a bother when Liz asks about visiting the grave. Of note, yes, Antonio Peralez has a Columbarium Vault, which proves Liz is correct on this. She confesses that she herself has been told by others she's been acting strangely. V says she knew what V would find and she asserts that she doesn't know the who, how, or why, but "they're changing us". Jefferson apparently went on in great detail about a trip she swears they never went on, but she doesn't know if the vacation is a fake memory or if she's the one that doesn't remember.
She saw a stranger in their apartment tinkering with a monitor, only for him to be missing when it was reported to SSI and they looked at the feeds. The next day, she got a phone call from a stranger (whom she refers to by "he") saying that she's walking on thin ice and Jefferson could have an accident. They later erased all data that the phone call had happened. Elizabeth claims she's terrified for herself and her husband's safety and doesn't want V to reveal the truth. V points out "they" could be telling her to say that but it doesn't really change how she feels since she just wants Jefferson to be safe. She tells V to tell Jefferson it was SSI spying for Holt. She asserts she wants SSI out of her roof if they're spying on their sleep. She will take responsibility for firing SSI, but wants Jefferson to be safe and out of that fight. She adds a meeting with Jefferson to his calendar at Reconciliation Park. But, ultimately it's V's choice (especially since she has no idea if she'll remember the conversation) and leaves. Johnny jumps and and talks and mentions that there were talks like this back in his day and worrying about the damage a puppet mayor could do.
V heads to Reconciliation Park to meet with Jefferson. Entering, V is called by an Unknown Number which blacks out V's optics. They claim to know who V is, *what* V is, and what V wants. It doesn't matter what V tells Jefferson, but "don't dare cross that line" and "you're playing with fire". Its a garbled male robo voice, so safe to say it's irrelevant to the owner.
Enter Stage Right, our missing lead; Mr. Blue Eyes. He is standing on a balcony watching the place where we meet Jefferson. In the Scanner, he is labeled "Mr. Blue Eyes", has no known affiliation, is wanted for "SC 370", and is wanted for "Classified". His eyes are electronically glowing blue you can even see from several yards away. You cannot injure him as grenades do nothing and you can't aim at him. Of small note, and I don't know if this ACTUALLY means anything, but his hair style asset is referred to as Morgan Blackhand in the files, but could mean nothing if this hair is actually used by other NPCs. MOST LIKELY THIS IS NOTHING UNLESS SOMEONE HAS FURTHER INFO.
(Plot twist: It meant something. But we'll get there.)
V sits with Jefferson and can reveal the truth; "SSI is on the take from an unknown group to control your lives". V can even point out the absurdity of Peralez being as successful of a politician as he is without any corp sponsors. "They want you to be *their* mayor. Molding you like clay". You can tell Jefferson how to proceed and additional details, but it doesn't matter. Later, Jefferson will send a text and delete your number and so will Elizabeth, who will call you out for telling Jeff. In the end credits voicemails, Jefferson has decended into paranoia about some vitamins Liz gave him which he didn't trust so he sent them to the lab, only to then not trust the lab results saying they're fine. Jefferson Peralez is confirmed the new mayor during Late Act 2 and the major difference is his state of mind at the end game; either hiring V to be on his security staff or descending into absolute paranoia over everything in his life.
Lastly, Johnny appears and cryptically talks about back in his day when they'd talk about rogue AIs. Personally... I kinda completely dismiss this? It comes out of nowhere, Johnny cites NOTHING for why he'd bring this up in relation to the case, and I can't fathom a motive. I’d also point out that this isn’t the only time Johnny is outright wrong. In fact, he’s wrong A LOT in the game. For example, he criticizes V for listening to the Netwatch Agent and that he’s bullshitting you. Except, the agent is 100% correct that VDB did spike V as a suicide virus and Johnny is actually wrong. He also claims he doesn’t know what happened with Thompson after Never Fade Away, but this is a lie because Thompson is flying the AV Johnny takes to Arasaka in 2023. The only connection I can find is "Who is controlling Blue-Eyes" which might make Johnny correct, if just not in the way 'Rogue AIs' initially implies.
So, what actually has happened?
The Peralez family has been molded for a very long time into being the perfect political couple. They got scholarships from the Night Foundation for two fancy law degrees, have successful political careers, and Jefferson is running for Mayor on an anti-corp platform, an insanity for Night City. And he's actually successful at it. During a maintenance service at night on the Peralez's apartment, Jefferson woke up and shot an SSI/Unknown agent making repairs. The Control Booth knocked Jefferson out and they pulled the agent out of the apartment into the secret room. SSI put the Peralezes back into bed and hastily cleaned up everything, but the damage was done and Peralez hired V who uncovered mostly everything.
Elizabeth seems to be initially very upset by the discovery, but wants V off the trail when we meet her next. However, she's not in on it as she's equally a victim to the brainwashing/gaslighting and that's for certain. I think she's a pawn who is either too scared or too programmed to break the rules of movement on this chessboard. It's worth noting that, while the unknown entity threatens Jefferson's life and V's well being, they do not make due on either of these threats. I call their bluff. They have put too much work into Jefferson to abandon or kill him.
But, where else have we heard of this gaslighting brainwash process before?
"FULL DISCLOSURE"
Ok, we're on the shorter end so I don't have to actually explain this quest in full. Sandra Dorsett is a netrunner and a very skilled on at that, actually collecting data from Night Corp. She was kidnapped by the savs we rescued her from at the beginning of the game shortly AFTER she stole this data, suggesting Night Corp was behind it. This data is on the shard she asks you to collect during the aforementioned quest. V has full ability to NOT read it, but let's look at it; "Operation Carpe Noctem" ("Seize The Night" in Latin)
Described in it is an experiment on Night Corp's own employees where they are quietly brainwashing them and getting them to do whatever they want. They specifically cite an empathetic and calm employee who they got to fight a co-worker and then jump from a 16th floor window. The shard ends on mentioning that they're ready to install CN-07 on "our actual target".
I think multiple quests discussing brainwashing and gaslighting is too coincidental to be utterly unrelated to each other. I think Night Corp's actual target mentioned here is Peralez.
So, what is Night Corp?
Night Corp is the most mysterious of the corps in Night City. It currently operates to better Night City via philanthropic ventures, fundraising, community support, and city infrastructure. Basically, while Militech and Arasaka and the others operate in the city, Night Corp basically RUNS the actual city. They're also noteworthy for the level of security they have that even the best netrunners can't get much from them and, since they keep to themselves and seemingly just do city infrastructure stuff, no one really super bothers them. It has been run by Miriam Night, wife of late-Richard Night, until recently and we currently don’t actually know who runs NightCorp.
Originally, they were the Night Foundation, but that requires explaining Richard Night... oh boy, Lore Drop. I'll make it quick as possible.
Richard Night is the founder of Night City. He started as a partner of a firm, but his ambitions grew beyond that to founding "Night International" to build his dream; a city that would be so grand it would make all other cities pale by comparison, Coronado City. A capitalist mecha of opportunity, Night City would be run by corporations and have next to no anti-business policies on the books. Arasaka, EMB, and Petrochem were his first backers and he came into claim of land on the central-California coast; Del Coronado Bay and Morro Bay would be the location of his dream city.
(BTW, irl, Morro Bay, California is a real place. Been there, have family there, go there regularly, kinda cool!).
Despite being a capitalist mecca city and run by corps, Richard Night also dreamed it to be "A sprawling metropolis, free of crime, of poverty, of debt. A place where people could live safely, peacefully, without having to worry about the dire situations that were growing around the world at the time".
However, due to the design plans, Night didn't employ local contractors and instead got expensive architects and builders from all over the world. Local builders didn't like that, they had mob connections, bloodshed started. And soon Richard Night was murdered by an unknown assassin, presumably a mob hitman. The city was renamed Night City in his honor and his dream utopia became to embody everything that was destroying the world. Mob took control and corps didn't give a fuck since it didn't hurt them any until they eventually had to take out the mob gangs, but not in any favor to Night’s dream either.
Miriam Night, Richard's Widow, founded the Night Foundation (later Night Corp) to stick to Richard's Ideal dreams of what he wanted the city to be. They invest heavily in ecological research, alt power sources, civic infrastructure, public works, and charities and scholarships for Night City youth. "They've even managed to stay out of the normal corporate power struggles which tend to plague every other corporation, both inside the city and out. Even the shadowy corporate rumors about them, like having underwater bases in the bay or access to orbital satellites, remain unsubstantiated despite extensive investigation."
So, where does this put us now? We have ONE last quest...
"THE PROPHET'S SONG"
Garry The Prophet is our local crazy man. He spouts off insanities to anyone who will listen near Misty's Esoterica in Kabuki. However, some of his ideas aren't quite as much off the mark as one might think. There ain't no technonecromancers from Alpha Centuri (or Spanish Inquisition) nor is Saburo Arasaka an immortal vampire, but he was correct that Saburo wasn't dead and in fact immortal; via Mikoshi and The Relic.
He send you on a quest to investigate a meeting; he says that his ripper mistuned some cyberware in his head and he can hear their communications. You show up to a meeting between corps and Maelstrom. They say some nonsense phrases and transfer a data shard. Reading it ("Destroy After Reading") it seems like nonsense. But does include the line "The cages of men melt as night descends". You can decode it via a Null Cipher; first letter of every line: “Project Oracle Command Execute Plans”.
We don’t know what Project Oracle is. In real life, secret project or operation names actually tend to be chosen at random and are unrelated to the actual project (you can google funny stories about names that ended up awkward to the actual project), so this could mean nothing. But, narratives tend to give meaning to everything. Oracles are mythical in references and could predict the future or see the unseen. Perhaps perfect prediction via behind the scenes manipulations? Not sure we’ll get answers on this one for now.
Going back to Garry, he's been kidnapped. His protoge is screaming he's been kidnapped "Black suits came by - blue eyes and all". Blue Eyes huh? Further, she claims that they threw him into an invisible AV... Huh, like the one we saw back during "Dream On"? "Night's comin... The eternal night"
So, it’s time to jump us to the final step in our Fool’s Journey: The Sun.
“THE SUN”
The Sun ending has V wake up in their new penthouse apartment (with their love interest if they have one). Checking the computer, we see emails from our dear Mr. Blue Eyes. He wants an answer from V as to the job to the Crystal Palace he has planned and that they’re on a tight schedule for “obvious reasons”. We meet with him at the Afterlife and he talks about the job; Casino security is going into maintenance and V mentions giving him the casino client list. V also asks him to “hold up your end of the bargain”. They never discuss eddies or payment. It’s all in such vague terms. “Your end” or “Obvious reasons”. Smaller point but an email from Vik on the space shuttle also tells us that he’s asked around about Blue Eyes and has nothing; either he works with people WAY above Vik’s paygrade or he’s shady as hell… or both.
I think Blue Eyes knows V is dying (the obvious reasons) and I think the unspecified payment is V’s survival. V always says that they want to come back to their love interest so it’s not a mindless suicide run and I don’t think V would risk it all for nothing but eddies; especially not after Reaper (both versions) paint suicide runs as a horrible terrible thing. To then glorify it in another ending… no, the game is smarter than that.
Your love interest doesn’t seem to be too upset about the situation either. Panam and Judy leave V in The Sun due to their lives taking different directions, but it seems mostly amicable and understanding. They even express desire to see V again because they know V needs to do this job. Kerry, who stays with V in The Sun and expresses worry and also a desire to settle down with V, also seems mostly understanding that V needs to go on this quest. I don’t think they’d be so calm and loving and understanding if this were a suicide run. They know more than the player does.
Further, I think Blue Eyes isn’t after the casino aspect of the Crystal Palace at all. While that’s the major commercial aspect of the station as marketed to the citizen world, the station also has embassies from every nation on earth, facilities from all the major corporations, and is pretty much THE place where all the dark corporate espionage goes down. There’s so much more to this location than ‘casino resort’. *EVERY* corp has space stations and hideaways in space because the Crystal Palace offers it’s own legalities and opportunities that are not allowed within Earth’s terms and conditions. If they want to do some research that would be frowned upon elsewhere and get up to some Top Secret shit, it’ll be in outer space. Night City is controlled by corps and has lax laws, but outer space’s are even more so.
I think the cure V wants is not only on the station, I think it’s what Blue Eyes himself is after, but I’ll get there when it’s time to theory craft about the future.
I think it’s worth noting; Blue Eyes IS IN THE TRAILER FOR THE GAME. Yeah, anyone remember that shot on a shuttle with a guy being burned out from the inside? Yeah, he’s there. In the foreground. *Smirking*. The shuttle also seems like they’re in space.
These events leading to the Crystal Palace and the conspiracy with Blue Eyes are blatant DLC Hooks for the future and suggest a post-game DLC. This isn’t the first CDPR has done so either; Blood and Wine takes place after the story of Witcher 3 and is explicitly incompatible with the worst endings of that game. I think, conceivably, other endings where V is still alive could be roped into this adventure; Blue Eyes merely needs to hire them with the same offer of survival. While The Star takes V to Arizona and away from Night City, I think that choice of location is appropriate as, to even get to space for The Crystal Palace, citizens go from LAX to Arizona for a space port to launch them off Earth’s surface. They could have chosen anywhere else to send Panam and V, but they choose Arizona, huh. I do think Reaper, Temperance, and Devil will be locked out of this future, however, as all make any point of Blue Eyes hiring V irrelevant; there’s no V left to hire/save. MAYBE a rejected Devil ending, but I wouldn’t blame them for not continuing that conclusion either as Devil is one of the bad endings.
So, it’s finally time to really compile a lot of this information into where I think this is going in the next comment below

SALT LAKE CITY

• Mary Cosby ‘Was Not Expecting’ Her ‘Unconventional’ Marriage to Step-Grandfather to Be Included in Trailer (US Weekly exclusive)

"An unpleasant surprise? Mary Cosby didn’t think her marriage to her step-grandfather, Robert Cosby Sr., would draw so much attention in the teaser for season 1 of The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City.
“I was not expecting it to be dropped on social media,” Mary told Us Weekly exclusively on Thursday, January 21, while discussing the latest addition to the Bravo franchise, which premiered in November 2020. “That was more of a disappointment for me because I feel like social media is a place I don’t feel comfortable in.”
In the first episode of RHOSLC, Mary opened up about her “arranged marriage” to Robert Sr., who was the second husband of Mary’s late grandmother. Despite their “unconventional” relationship, the pair have been happily married for 20 years and share son Robert Jr. While filming the reality series, Mary wanted to be as honest about her relationship as possible.
“I just said my truth and I was ready to air it,” she told Us. “I felt like it was time and I felt like it was the right thing to do. … I mean, it is unconventional, but it’s not unheard of, I guess, in other countries.”
When the first trailer for the series debuted in September 2020, however, Mary felt like she didn’t have a chance to create her own narrative about her marriage before it played out on TV.
“They put that story right there with me,” she added. “It didn’t set it in a good light for me.”
While the circumstances of her marriage might seem shocking to viewers, Mary is “not ashamed” of the choices she made in her life that led her to where she is now. Though their wedding was arranged, the pair were “best friends” in the early days of their relationship — and it eventually blossomed into something more.
“I think it started changing into a loving relationship when I started wanting a son … probably two [or] three years into the marriage,” the reality star told Us. “I think that’s when I felt that I knew that this was my life, once I started having that craving [to be] a mom and [have] a family. … I have no regrets, I have no shame.”
Since RHOSLC premiered last fall, the Utah native has tried to let any negative comments about her lifestyle go in one ear and out the other.
“Sometimes I read it and sometimes I respond back to them and block them. Then sometimes I read it and [think], like, ‘OK, that’s your opinion,” she explained. “I try to separate it and I try not to put emotion into it. … In my mind, I’m not here to make sense. I’m here to tell you, ‘This is what Mary is and this is what I’m about.’ And this is my story and you don’t have to accept it again.”

• Preview of next SLC episode (Queens of Bravo Twitter)

DALLAS

• D’Andra Simmons Reveals Whether She’d Take A Phone Call From LeeAnne Locken After Friendship Fallout (HollywoodLife exclusive)

"The Real Housewives of Dallas’ D’Andra Simmons, 51, and former co-star LeeAnne Locken, 53, had a lot of beef both on and off camera during season 4. But over a year later, is D’Andra open to answering a phone call from her former pal? “Probably not,” the Hard Night Good Morning beauty and Ultimate Living founder told HollywoodLife exclusively during an episode of TVTalk on Instagram Live on Jan. 18. “I want to be honest because I am honest. I think that that ship has sailed,” she confessed.
D’Andra and LeeAnne were longtime pals before joining the cast in season 2 and 1 respectively. But things got messy when D’Andra questioned her former pal’s now husband, Rich Emberlin’s, faithfulness to LeeAnne. D’Andra apologized, but that wasn’t enough for LeeAnne to forgive her! D’Andra was excluded from LeeAnne’s wedding festivities, even though her co-stars urged her to accept it and move on.
The two then took it to social media where they continued to throw shade at one another and D’Andra is still having trouble moving past things. “For me, the reason is because of the persecution I endured on social media for 3 years,” D’Andra added. “And what I went through, there’s just no going back from that because a lot of the false narrative put out there about me really hurt me and it was very stressful. So that’s why.”
The Dallas based CEO can move past things, but she’s having trouble forgetting the feelings she has surrounding the situation. “It’s not that I can’t forgive,” D’Andra said. “I’m a Christian and the bible says to forgive. I can forgive her, but you also can’t be stupid and go back and put yourself in a situation where somebody can hurt you again.”
Despite her feelings on the future of their friendship, D’Andra respects the legacy that the Dallas OG brought to the table. “You never want to devalue what LeeAnne brought to the franchise,” D’Andra revealed. “She started from the beginning. She brought a lot to the franchise. She helped build this franchise. Her contributions can never be questioned because she gave a lot for 4 years.”
POTOMAC

• Gizelle Bryant Just Shared the Most Stunning Family Photo with Her 3 Daughters (Gizelle Bryant Instagram/Bravo)

ORANGE COUNTY

• Shannon Beador Once ‘Pulled an All-Nighter’ With ‘Vanderpump Rules’ Star Tom Sandoval (US Weekly exclusive)

"Worlds collide! Shannon Beador‘s friendships go beyond the Real Housewives franchise, as evidenced by some of her favorite Instagram pics.
The Real Housewives of Orange County star, 56, gave Us Weekly exclusive insight into her wildest posts in a round of the “I Can Explain” game — and revealed she’s bonded with members of the Vanderpump Rules cast, including Tom Schwartz and Tom Sandoval.
“That was taken the night of the season 13 reunion,” Beador told Us of the October 2018 selfie with the TomTom co-owners. “We’d just filmed the reunion and I was dating someone who was in town and at a party where the Toms were.”
While Beador hadn’t met Schwartz, 38, before that night, she’d previously crossed paths with Sandoval, 37, and his girlfriend, Ariana Madix, at an event in St. Louis. “We went to the casino afterward and basically pulled an all-nighter there,” Beador joked. “They’re tons of fun.”
Bravo stars aren’t the only famous faces featured on Beador’s social media account. The reality TV personality also dished on a backstage meeting with Bret Michaels at a charity benefit in Scottsdale, Arizona, which resulted in an Instagram moment for the ages.
“He was performing [there] and I had met him after we filmed the finale of season 13. I went to his concert and I was able to go backstage and meet him,” the California native recalled of the January 2019 photo. “He knew that I dressed up like him for drag queen bingo. He’s such a kind person.”

To all GME holders: Shut up and listen
This text was originally posted in Mauerstrassenwetten by u/knutolee. I thought his message was so powerful that I asked him for permission to translate, post (can share chat with Mod if required or check directly with him) and fuck his wife (ok didn’t ask for permission) after and he agreed to all most of this wholeheartedly – like a true Autist. I am trying to catch the message – so don’t expect a word by word translation as you can never catch the greatness of the text in it’s entirety and I got to translate it in a way that even a US degenerate can follow it.
As usual no financial advice, I more or less just copied the text because I liked the text and I like the share. In general I have likely lost more than I won and the stock market is a mystery in itself to me. So make your own due dilligence and don’t trust financial advice of others (the argument for that you can read to a certain extent below).
Autists, Degenerates, Idiocracy of the World – let me get this straight!
In the coming days I don’t wanna see all this whining and bitching on this sub and espescially in the daily GME threads anymore. On every fucking corner of this sub I smell doubt, you read messages the likes of „this is over“, „we missed the squeeze“, „I am going to loose it all“, „entered at 320$ - I am doomed“. What the fuck is wrong with you retards, did you fucking wanker your wifes boyfriend dick all night and lost your mind over the effort to do so? I think I got to get this accross the Buddy Stephens way to get you down to fucking earth and get your attitude right.
1) You come to a sub called wallstreetbets and yolo your hard earned money in $GME
You realize what you are doing here - you true fuck - dont you? This is a community of full blown first class true tits up degenerates which take pleasure in posting losses accumulating into the millions every fucking month and you are putting your money into a BET – yes my dear it is written out in the name of this very fucking sub Wallstreet-B-E-T-S!!! – and follow DD posted by people with names like „SHOW_ME_YOUR_ANAL_TITS“? You realize this is not a fucking Disney ferry „One-Wish-comes-true“ show and we see all day long gain porn and loss porn is something which doesn’t exist in this world? This is a band of true autists which occupied an absolute niche when it comes down to trading (and we even don’t trade stocks normally!). This is the place where one wants to enjoy the sado-masochistic part of the retarded capitalistic system we are living in. Yes we have some (maybe a lot) DD diamonds in this sub which by the way are now impossible to find because you degenerate fucks spam the entire system to the moon but no sane long-term investor would consider to invest into any of these investments – this is about „get rich or die trying!“. This is not investing!
2) Yeah but I saw Reddit in the news and all that stuff about GME and it was going through the roof becasue there is going to be short squeeze and on top of it the hedge funds fucked up, hihihi
If this entire thing was a safe bet why exactly would not the fucking entire world jump on this train? (and even you might get this image from all this „Saudi Arabia calling, China calling, Africa calling posts – but please they invest into BABA, Aramco or I don’t know what’s the hot shit in Lagos stock exchange right now – could be though the next big thing – got to see if I can find a DD on this). So why is this not happening? Because it is a fucking BET – the stock market is a fucking Casino and the major difference between investing and us is that they are always just bet on black or red, while we always go for the magical zero. It is totally unclear whether all of us going to show up at Miami Beach with our Porsche Cayenne or Tesla Model S and hit on the girls (or boys) on the beach! The reasons are layed out to you every fucking day with yet another quality DD that most of us simply dont understand! And yes our chances to already sit on the fucking moon slurping our Pinha Coladas would be certainly higher if everything was going the way we believe the system should be working but even the last person who joined this sub by now should realize – you are potentially fucking with the system itself (by the way something this sub never intentionally wanted and you shouldn’t do if you like the system).
3) Hey but when is the squeeze of the squoze going to happen? 😓
So there is this story going through the media and from Florida to Colorado everybody remotely degenerate is yoloing money into GME. It’s a fucking global movement now (or not – could be also the same 50.000 degenerates cheering up themselves the entire time which would much better fit this place) and according to the DD we just need to have 🙌💎and the shorts a bleeding their panties, their balls feel squozen (and not in a good way) and they are completely in defensive mode. What do you think what people who are responsible for Multi-billion $$$ HF are going to do? How do you think you become a person who is responsible for such an operation? Do you think these guys have served as altar boys or girls in church (no offense if so)? What is wrong with you? Seriously! Do you think if they get some headwind they are going to say: Oh boy – we got defeated and going to realize a multi-fucking-billion-to-the-moon loss? OF COURSE FUCKING NOT! THEY WILL GET EVERY FUCKING BAZOOKA, TANK, ROCKET or INTER-STELLAR DEFENSE SYSTEM IN PLACE TO BRING THIS TO AN END! Influence the market participants (speculation), Short-Laddar attacks (I to this very day haven’t understand the concept or how this works – speculation), demotivational tactics (speculation) and to whomever picks it up – desinformation (well not quite speculation but it could also be that media is just retarded as fuck to get the most simple facts straight). So what would you do with a potential group of 5mn small-size investors – shall we do a collective effort to think about it? Ah fuck it! It is to fucking obvious – you would dry this out through time, divide their interests and drive away their attention. Because let’s be fucking honest – most of you entered this thinking you would hold this wonderful stock for a couple of days (and to be honest in this respect the community how it existed 10 days ago was much more true to itself - no whining just sayin)! Gotcha! Who can tell me who fucked each other two weeks ago in People magazin or on Twitter? Nobody – I even don’t remember shit about this very forum before GME (ok I remember u/variation-separate but that is another story). And all their tactics are completely understandable because there is a fucking huge amount of tendies to be made and they are not that different from us (my fear).
4) That does not give you the fucking right to whine and bitch all the time in the daily threads (and it is not happening already its going to be) and fucking ruin the party
Deal with it – we just got to wait how this thing plays out. That’s it. If we are right – this will play out positively in one or another way (huge tendies or SEC investigating). Let them continue shorting the stock or whatever. If you believe you want to buy more stock – do your DD and do it. When this got picked up a long time ago by people they thought – hmmmm makes sense – I am going to get me one of these tickets to the moon. There was if at all a very little interest to squoze the balls of any HF and it was certainly not the main motivation of this sub. I said it above: Get rich or die tryin! Since last Thursday the whole thing became political and it looks like rules were changed in our disfavour and yeah we can not go back in time but we got to deal with it and the circumstances. [Left out this part as it promotes holding and buying which I don’t want to in the sense that everybody needs to make his own fucking decision but I am going to fucking hold] but WE NEED TO REGAIN OUR POSITIVE SPIRIT which was an essential part of this sub and GME for most part in January (and of course in general before) – no matter how fucked up things looked (individually as there is not such a thing as collective alignment to buy options or stocks on this forum). We will see how the numbers are play out and who provided the adequate picture. In our reality GME is going to the moon and the 🚀 is fueled. Period. We are just prevented from starting because of the windy conditions out there.
So please – no post without 🙌💎🙌💎🙌💎🚀🚀🚀 and if you want to fukn leave the party – leave – but let us continue this party, because we are going to the fkn moon. This is the way and I fkn love GME and if this means I need to hold onto this beauty for another 25 years I am going to do it.
P.S.: One thing dear to my heart - in the past there has been huge donations made by this community to people living with autism. As we use their names every fkn day I would really like to see some of your degenerates not to forget about this cause because we owe them and as much as I like the billboards I’d rather see every $$$ go into charities rather then telling the world about us – I think everybody out there knows by now that we exist and that we have 🙌💎
Edit: Nobody asked for it but 35@231,69 and thanks for the awards which should go to u/knutolee - so you can simply award his original post referenced. More importantly he expressed to me that he is very happy with the translation which is almost as important as the message itself.
Edit 2: Please pay attention to AMA Marc Cuban - https://www.reddit.com/wallstreetbets/comments/lawubt/hey_everyone_its_mark_cuban_jumping_on_to_do_an/ - there is I think some quite enlighting answers in a very easy to understand language.
Edit 3: Bought 5@103
Edit 4: Heading for dinner. Crazy times. Will check later and decide whether to buy more tickets or not. But maybe good advice for some others to make a break. Chillax :)
Edit 5: Read that RH has opened up GME again. For whatever it's worth 🚀
Edit 6: Thanks again for all the Awards and stuff. I can only reload in the morning. Was fun and maybe I am going to translate more in the future - if mods would consider to give me a copy cat 😺 flair it would be the icing on the cake.
Edit 7: Obligatory salute to the one and only DFV and his 💎 balls. This guy will go all the way to the 🚀 with us.

Warning: massive amount of text ahead. I created a mostly functional race route around the world (all loactions like buildings, businesses, landmarks, etc. are REAL locations and could theoretically actually work in the race). I tried to have a good variety in locations and types of challenges, but it's really hard! I find it a lot harder to complain about challenge design after making this. Even though this could technically happen there are probably some safety concerns in going to South Africa and Lesotho and it's probably not possible for the American Amazing Race to film in Cuba, but I decided to do it anyway. If you have any questions or feedback please let me know!
​
RACE #2
Leg 1 (USA - Japan)
Leg 2 (Japan - South Korea)
Leg 3 (South Korea - India)
Leg 4 (India - Oman)
Leg 5 (Oman)
Leg 6 (Oman - South Africa)
Leg 7 (South Africa - Lesotho)
Leg 8 (Lesotho - Greece)
Leg 9 (Greece)
Leg 10 (Greece - North Macedonia)
Leg 11 (North Macedonia - Cuba)
Leg 12 (Cuba - USA)
​
LEG 1
USA - Japan
Start at Cloud Gate, Chicago, Illinois
Run to clue at Millenium Monument
Clue #1
Make your way to the Gunma region of Japan, and travel to Sarugakyu Onsen. However, to get your tickets to Japan, you must make your way on foot through the busy streets of Chicago to Navy Pier, where flights will be given out according to the order of your arrival. Flights go to Tokyo, and you must make your own travel arrangements from there.
Flight 1 (5 teams): Chicago - Los Angeles - Tokyo, arrives 8:00 AM
Flight 2 (4 teams): Chicago - Tokyo, arrives 9:30 AM
Flight 3 (2 teams): Chicago - San Francisco - Tokyo, arrives 9:45 AM
Clue #2
Both team members must go into the hot springs and search it for the partly submerged cluebox to get your next clue.
Clue #3
Travel to Sarugakyo Bungy for your next clue.
Clue #4
Roadblock: Who’s ready to take a jump?
Bungy jump at the largest bungy jump in all of Japan at 62 meters, or over 200 feet! Once you’ve taken your leap of faith, you’ll receive your next clue.
Clue #5
Travel to Uenokunirokunomiya Haruna Shrine, Takasaki, for your next clue.
Clue #6
Create one string of paper cranes in Senbazuru. Senbazuru is the crafting of 1000 paper cranes for good luck. Following the demonstration, learn how to craft paper cranes. Once you have created forty of them and strung them together, deliver them to a Shinto priest at Akiba Shrine. He will give you your next clue.
Clue #7
Travel by train to Akihabara, Tokyo, and go to the top of the Tokyo Skytree to receive your next clue.
Clue #8
Roadblock: Who can ‘go’ kart? The teammate who did the first roadblock cannot do this one.
Travel to Akihabari Street Kart 1 and dress up in one of the many ridiculous costumes the company has to offer. Then, join a fifteen minute go-karting tour around the streets of this bustling region and look for three enormous signs in race colors with three different Japanese characters on them. If you can spot and write all three characters down correctly during the rush of Tokyo, you’ll receive your next clue. If you can’t get it right, you’ll have to join the next available tour.
Clue #9
Travel to Horin Park on foot to find the first pit stop! The last team to check in here may be eliminated.
Pit Stop, Leg 1
trip to Canada
last: eliminated
​
LEG 2
Japan - South Korea
Clue #1
Fly to Busan, South Korea! Upon arrival, make your way to Beomeo-sa for your next clue.
Fast Forward, Leg 2
Go to Songdo Beach and swim out into the ocean, locating the five whale statues in the water. At each statue, pick up marked letter tiles. Once you have all seven (two statues have two tiles), you can go back to the beach and unscramble the letters that spell out the name of a traditional South Korean delicacy that the other contestants eat at their first challenge. If you get the right word, you’ll be given a clue that takes you straight to the end of the leg.
Clue #2
Master the art of Korean meditation. If you can master all of the moves correctly, then your instructor will give over your next clue.
Clue #3
Head to Taejongdae for your next clue.
Clue #4
Roadblock: Who’s desperate to eat?
Take the marked path over one mile uphill to the marked food stand, and finish one serving of Soondae, a traditional South Korean delicacy that is made of pig intestines and pork blood. Once you have finished the food, you can run down to your partner and get your next clue.
Clue #5
Take the Songdo Marine Cable Car from Songnim Park to Amnam Park to receive your next clue.
Clue #6
Detour: Fish Identity or Fish Delivery
Fish Identity: Go to Jagalchi Fish Market and search for the marked stall. Once there, sort an enormous box of fish and organize them. Once the stall owner approves, put them up for stock in the stall to receive your next clue.
Fish Delivery: Go to Jacky’s Seafood and take three orders and three addresses that need to be delivered. Once you have delivered all the fish to all the correct addresses throughout the Gamcheon Culture Village, you will receive your next clue.
Clue #7
Make your way to the pit-stop at Haedong Yonggungsa. The last team to arrive may be eliminated.
Pit-Stop, Leg 2
-first: trip to Belize
-last: non-elimination
​
LEG 3
South Korea - India
Clue #1
Fly to Hyderabad, India, and go to the Charminar for your first clue.
Clue #2
Travel to Ramoji Film City Main Entrance to receive your next clue.
Speed Bump, Leg 3
Make your way to Saha’s Adventure Park and zorb down a steep hill. Once you’ve made it, you can continue racing.
Clue #3
Detour: Birdy Woods or Bollywood
Birdy Woods: Dressing up in clumsy bird costumes, search through Asia’s largest aviary for a cutout of the bird your partner is dressing up as. Once you’ve found the two cutouts, head to the Bonsai Garden. If you match the right bird, you’ll receive your next clue.
Bollywood: Head to Ramoji Movie Magic. Dressing up in traditional Indian outfits, memorize a short dance to the tune of some Bollywood music and perform it to the live audience and judges. If you meet their standards, you’ll receive your next clue.
Clue #4
Head to Nehru Zoological Park where your next clue will be waiting.
Clue #5
Take an amazing elephant ride! With both teammates on the elephant’s back guide it through a short course. If you can reach the end in under two minutes, you’ll receive your next clue.
Clue #6
Make your way to Bidar Fort by public transport for your next clue.
Clue #7
Roadblock: Who’s itching to get etching?
One team member must help in the process of the creation of bidriware. First, you must chisel one section in the piece of bidriware very precisely. Any error and you must restart. If given the clear, then you must then make their way inside Bidar Fort and collect a total of three baskets of soil for the artisans to use later in the process. Finally, you must use some of the soil you collected and coat a piece of bidriware in it. If every part of the challenge was done to the satisfaction of the artisans, you will receive your next clue.
Clue #8
Make your way to the Bahmani Tombs and the pit-stop! The last team to arrive will be eliminated.
Pit-Stop, Leg 3
-first: trip to Japan
-last: eliminated
​
LEG 4
India - Oman
Clue #1
Fly to Muscat, Oman! Once you have arrived, make your way to Al Alam Palace, where you will find marked cars waiting outside. Your clue will be waiting on the car.
Clue #2
Drive all the way to the Nizwa Souq in Nizwa, Oman, where you will find nine different tags, each releasing teams at different times the next morning, when you will be given your next clue.
Tag 1: departure at 7:00 AM
Tag 2: departure at 7:05 AM
Tag 3: departure at 7:10 AM
Tag 4: departure at 7:15 AM
Tag 5: departure at 7:20 AM
Tag 6: departure at 7:25 AM
Tags 7-9: departure at 7:30 AM
Clue #3
Detour: Selling Goats or Weighing Dates
Selling Goats: Navigate through the souq to the weekly goat market. You must select a seller and help them sell their goats. First, thoroughly clean five goats so they are ready for selling. Then, parade five goats around the “walking circle,” where potential buyers will inspect which goats to buy. You must finally buy a goat yourself, haggling for a price under 100 riyals, or 260 US dollars. Once you can purchase a goat, you will receive your next clue. Keep the goat for the next challenge.
Weighing Dates: Find the marked stall in the souq that is selling dates. Your goal is to weigh out 200 grams of Ajwa Dates, 175 grams of Barhi Dates, and 125 grams of Hayani Dates. To do this, you must travel across the market to a scale at a different date stall. If you can get the perfect amount of dates, you will receive your next clue. Keep the dates for the next challenge.
Clue #4
Travel on foot to the Contemporary Mosque with either your goat or dates and trade them with the man waiting out front for your next clue.
Clue #5
Make your way back to the souq, and head to Omani Craftsman's House where you will find your next clue.
Clue #6
Roadblock: Who can work and weave?
The teammate participating in this roadblock must help create a small basketwork bowl. After watching the example, you must use the provided materials to finish off the bowl. If it meets the requirement of the shop owner, you will receive your next clue.
Clue #7
Make your way to the pit-stop for this leg of the race, Nizwa Fort! The last team to arrive may be eliminated.
Pit-Stop, Leg 4
-first: continue racing
-last: continue racing
​
LEG 5
Oman
Clue #1
Drive yourself to Bimmah Sinkhole in Muscat, Oman! You will receive your next clue after having a cup of delicious locally-made coffee. Caution! Double U-Turn ahead!
Clue #2
Detour: Script Write or Shipwright
Script Write: Drive to Bait al Zubair and go into the Manuscript Room. Using a provided paper and translation guide, figure out what the marked manuscript says in English. If anything is wrong when submitting it, though, you must start completely over.
Shipwright: Drive to Oman Maritime Boatyard and find the marked boat. Oman Maritime has been reviving the craft of making the traditional wooden boats of Oman’s past, and you must help with the process. First, you must hand-sand a small section of the marked vessel. Then, you and your partner must work together to stitch coconut palm fiber through twenty holes, or eighty total stitches. Once you’re done, you’ll receive your next clue.
Clue #3
Make your way to Mutrah Souk for your next clue and the U-Turn board!
Clue #4
Search through the enormous market for one of three marked stalls. One you’ve found a stall, search through their wares for a trinket with a red/yellow flag on the bottom. Give the correct trinket to the shop owner, and they will hand you your next clue.
Clue #5
Drive yourself to Qurum Beach, where you will receive your next clue.
Clue #6
Roadblock: Who will pass the shells?
For this challenge, one team member must watch the demonstration of two fishermen playing a traditional Omani game, Al Hawalees. You must first create a “board” in the sand and collect the required amount of shells to play. You must then challenge a local fisherman. If you can win while following all of the rules correctly, you will receive your next clue.
Clue #7
Make your way to the pit-stop at Wadi Bani Khalid. The last team to check in will be eliminated.
Pit-Stop, Leg 5
-first: trip to Tanzania
-last: eliminated
​
LEG 6
Oman - South Africa
Clue #1
Fly out of Oman to Durban, South Africa, on one of two flights.
Flight 1 (2 teams): Muscat - Durban, arrives 7:30 AM
Flight 2 (6 teams): Muscat - Dar es Salaam - Durban, arrives 8:00 AM
Upon touching down, make your way to Moses Mabhida Stadium, where you will find your next clue.
Clue #2
Roadblock: Who will swing for the skies?
One team member must strap in and complete the Big Rush Big Swing, the largest swing in the world! Dive 263 feet down. Once you have finished the swing, you will receive a section and seat number. You will search the stands for your next clue.
Clue #3
Make your way to Umhlanga Lighthouse for your next clue.
Clue #4
Shake it up! In this challenge, you must create Lighthouse Bar’s famous “Umhlanga Schling.” Use the provided recipe to create fifteen drinks to perfection, and you will receive your next clue.
Clue #5
Head to Addington Beach and dig underneath one of the large sandcastles for your next clue.
Clue #6
Detour: Tree or Sea
Tree: For this detour, go to Durban Botanical Gardens. Use a provided golf cart to make your way to the famous Wood’s Cycad, a tree dating back to the age of dinosaurs. It has been cared for here since 1848. Once there, use one of the provided pieces to put together a large 3d puzzle of the tree. Once it has been approved, you will be handed your clue, and you can drive back to the front of the gardens and continue racing.
Sea: Go to uShaka Marine World and help out with some chores! First, help the kitchen staff and prepare 5 pounds of specially made vegetables for some of the aquarium’s fish. Second, travel around the park and take water samples from each of the specified exhibits. Finally, record blood test results taken during routine health check-ups. If you’ve completed all of the steps correctly, you will receive your next clue.
Clue #7
Head to the pit-stop at Suncoast Casino and Entertainment World! The last team to check in may be eliminated.
Pit-Stop, Leg 6
-first: 5k each
-last: eliminated
​
LEG 7
South Africa - Lesotho
Clue #1
Drive yourself through Qacha’s Nek and into Lesotho! Once in Lesotho, drive yourself to Maletsunyane Falls where you’ll find your next clue.
Fast Forward, Leg 7
By completing this fast forward, you will skip an overnight rest point and will be able to head directly to the pit-stop. Head to Sehlabathebe National Park. Once there, using the provided map and compass, ride by horseback to the nomadic tribal people’s current village. At the village, help cook pap-pap, a type of porridge common in Lesotho. The first team to complete the challenge will be able to head directly to the pit-stop.
Clue #2
Drive yourself to Seshoeshoe Decor and Fashion Designers in Maseru for your next clue.
Clue #3
Who can cut up a pattern?
One teammate will choose one of the complicated tribal Lesotho designs, and must find five pieces of fabric that match it perfectly. But be careful, the designs have miniscule differences between them. Once you’ve found all of your fabric, cut them at the directed places to receive your next clue.
Clue #4
Make your way to the Subeng River Dinosaur Footprints, where you will find seven tags, each releasing you at a time in the morning when you will receive your next clue.
Tags 1-2: departure at 7:00 AM
Tag 3: departure at 7:20 AM
Tag 4: departure at 7:40 AM
Tags 5-7: departure at 8:00 AM
Clue #5
Detour: Cave or Maze
Cave: For this challenge, go to Liphofung Cave. You must memorize all of the rock paintings in a specified section (15 paintings), and then run approximately a quarter-mile away and select the correct paper cutouts and put them in the right order as they were shown in the cave. When you have everything selected and ordered correctly, you’ll receive your next clue.
Maze: Make your way to the second largest dam in Africa, Katse Dam. Enter the first marked gallery and record the air temperature and the humidity. Use those observations to crack a complicated code, and enter the parallel gallery it directs you into. Be careful, it might be hard to find! If you enter the correct gallery, you will find a boat key, which you must give to the boatmaster. He will then give you a small ride around the reservoir and you’ll receive your next clue.
Clue #6
Drive yourself to Sani Stone Lodge for your next clue.
Clue #7
Help a local Basotho Shephard and their dogs move their sheep to a new grazing location. Don’t let the sheep get away! Once they’ve all been successfully moved, you’ll receive your next clue.
Clue #8
Make your way on foot to the pit-stop at Sani Top Chalet! The last team to check in may be eliminated!
Pit-Stop, Leg 7
-first: trip to Egypt
-last: non-elimination
​
LEG 8
Lesotho - Greece
Clue #1
Via Maseru International Airport, make your way to Athens, Greece, known to be the home of the first democracy! From there, make your way to the Theatre of Dionysus on The Acropolis, where you will take part in a U-Turn vote. The two teams with the most votes will be sentenced to an automatic U-Turn when they arrive at the detour. After the vote, teams will be given their next clue.
Clue #2
Fly to Chania, Greece on the island of Crete! Upon touching down, use the provided cars to make your way to the Agora and search for the marked stall.
Speed Bump, Leg 8
Together, team members must eat through a total of twelve Greek figs. Once all of the fruits have been stomached, that team can continue racing.
Clue #3
Detour: Traverse or Immerse
Traverse: Make your way to the Maritime Museum of Crete, and find the small yacht model outside the museum. Your goal is to remember as much as you can without writing it down, then make a half mile walk through the streets of Crete to the yacht harbor, where you must find a marked yacht and rearrange the items until it is just like it was in the model. Once the actual yacht matches the model, you’ll receive your next clue.
Immerse: Travel to Minoan’s World 3D Museum, and get treated to a five minute long “9D movie” on Cretan History which engages all of your senses. If you can answer all five questions correctly, you’ll receive your next clue. However, only two teams can participate in the show at once.
Clue #4
Drive to the Palace of Knossos for your next clue.
Clue #5
Use the provided map to navigate through the ruins, collecting puzzle pieces at each of the marked rooms. Once you have all ten bundles of pieces, head outside and recreate the large painting using the pieces you collected. Once it has been finished, you’ll receive your next clue.
Clue #6
Drive to Cretan Olive Oil Farm for your next clue.
Clue #7
Roadblock: Who is feeling oily?
In this challenge, one teammate will help in the process of creating olive oil. First, set up special tree-shaking equipment and a net, used to efficiently get olives out of the tree without bruising them. You will then sort the olives between bruised and fair. Finally, crush both bruised and fair olives with a traditional granite olive press. Once they have been successfully grinded into a paste, you’ll receive your next clue.
Clue #8
Find the pit-stop along the coast of the small village of Loutro back on the west side of Crete. You will soon discover, however, that the village is completely blocked off from the mainland by mountains, so you will have to find alternate transportation. Hurry, because the last team to arrive will be eliminated.
Pit-Stop, Leg 8
-first: trip to Austria
-last: eliminated
​
LEG 9
Greece
Clue #1
Fly back to the mainland in Thessaloniki! When you’ve arrived, search Aristotelous Square for your next clue.
Clue #2
Detour: Serve or Observe
Serve: For this detour head on foot to Bougatsa Giannis, a renowned restaurant in the Ladadika area. You must take the orders of twelve total people and retrieve the correct dishes for them from the kitchen. Each person also has a dessert, which must be retrieved from nearby pastry shop Trigona Elinidi. You may take notes, but if you mess up someone’s order, you must start it over again.
Observe: Go by taxi to the Thessaloniki Science Centre Technology Museum and make your way to the main planetarium. The night sky will be projected above, and will be moving around you at one hour of regular movement per second. Using the provided key, identify five Greek constellations first identified by Claudius Ptolemy- Orion, Ursa Major, Cassiopeia, Centaurus, and Perseus. Be careful, it might be dizzying! Once you’ve found all of the constellations, you’ll be rewarded with your next clue.
Clue #3
Find the Arch of Galerius for your next clue.
Clue #4 Use one of the marked cars to drive yourself for the rest of the leg. Go to the Thessaloniki Concert Hall for your next clue.
Clue #5
Roadblock: Who can blow a note and hold a tune?
Macedonian brass bands are extremely popular in the Macedonia region of Greece, so for this roadblock, learn how to play the trumpet, a popular instrument played in these bands. If you can play a few notes of the folk song with the band, you’ll get your next clue.
Clue #6
Drive to Dalamara Winery. Once there, follow the guide to the directed area, where you must load two empty kegs onto a horse drawn cart. Direct the horse approximately half a mile through the vineyard and return back to the kegs. You will continue to load and deliver a total of eight kegs to receive your next clue.
Clue #7
Drive to Ski Center Voras and take the lift to the top where Kajmakcalan, a chapel right on the border between Greece and North Macedonia is situated. The last team to arrive at this pit-stop may be eliminated.
Pit-Stop, Leg 9
-first: trip to Colombia
-last: eliminated
​
LEG 10
Greece - North Macedonia
Clue #1
Drive yourself across the border into North Macedonia to Popova Kula Winery! Once there, pull a tag that departs you at a certain time the next morning.
Tag 1: departure at 8:00 AM
Tag 2: departure at 8:10 AM
Tag 3: departure at 8:20 AM
Tags 4-5: departure at 8:30 AM
Clue #2
Roadblock: Who is a master chef?
The teammate doing this roadblock will use the provided recipe to cook the national dish of North Macedonia, Tavche Gravche, a special type of baked beans. If it is cooked to perfection, you’ll receive your next clue.
Clue #3
Drive yourself to the Millenium Cross in Skopje for your next clue.
Clue #4
Detour: Art Block or Charity Walk
Art Block: Drive to the Art Bridge, which is home to 29 statues of important Macedonian artists and musicians. Wandering on and around the bridge are 29 people dressed up as those artists and musicians. You must match nine total people to their statues. A maximum of three teams can complete this challenge.
Charity Walk: Drive to the Mother Teresa Memorial House and load a trolley cart with a marked group of items that will almost completely fill the trolley. On foot, travel to the SOS Children’s Village National Office where you are to deliver the items. If you do not choose this option, your items will still be donated after the leg.
Clue #5
Drive to the city of Struga, where the North Macedonian national anthem was created. Make your way to the Saint Archangel Michael Cave Church for your next clue.
Clue #6
Teammates must work together to memorize four total stanzas of the Macedonian national anthem- in Macedonian. If you can perform it with the orchestra without forgetting the lyrics, you’ll receive your clue to the next pit-stop.
Clue #7
Drive to the Monastery of St. Naum and the pit-stop! The last team to check in may be eliminated.
Pit-Stop, Leg 10
-first: trip to Indonesia
-last: eliminated
​
LEG 11
North Macedonia - Cuba
Clue #1
Make your way back to Skopje, then fly to Havana, Cuba, on two predetermined flights. Once there, go by taxi to Taller Calle 8, a car repair shop, where you will receive your next clue.
Flight 1 (2 teams): Skopje - Paris - Havana, arrives 6:30 AM
Flight 2 (2 teams): Skopje - London - Miami - Havana, arrives 7:10 AM
Clue #2
Roadblock: Who can fix it up?
The teammate doing this roadblock must follow the example to repair one of the classic Cuban cars. If it makes it past inspection, you’ll receive your next clue.
Clue #3
For the remainder of the leg, you’ll have to drive the car you just fixed. Head to Fusterlandia, where you’ll find your next clue.
Clue #4
Find where the attached image is in person throughout the folk neighborhood of Fusterlandia. If you can find where the image actually is and show the judge, you’ll receive your next clue.
Clue #5
Sell the Box or Find the Band
Sell the Box: Drive to Santa Maria del Mar Beach and sell the provided boxes of boxed rum, the “juice box for bug kids.” While never selling any box for under 25 Cuban Pesos, make 375 Cuban Pesos (around fifteen US dollars). Once you’ve made your sales, you’ll receive your next clue.
Find the Band: For this detour, drive to the Cuban Art Factory and observe the large, marked piece of sheet music in the first room. Going from room to room in the factory, try to find the band who is playing the music that was in the first room. You must make your guesses ten minutes apart, so be confident in your answers! Once you have chosen the right band, you’ll be rewarded with your next clue.
Clue #6
Drive to Vinales Valley Tobacco Field and search the marked area for your next clue.
Clue #7
Perfectly roll ten Cuban cigars, five per contestant. Watch the example closely, as any small mistake in rolling the tobacco leaf will cause the cigar to fail. Once all of the cigars have been perfectly rolled, you’ll receive your next clue.
Clue #8
Take a long drive to the eastern side of Cuba and the pit-stop at Ignacio Agramonte Park in Camaguey! The last team to check into the pit-stop will be eliminated.
Pit-Stop, Leg 11
-first: trip to Botswana
-last: eliminated
​
LEG 12
Cuba - USA
Clue #1
For the first part of this leg, you’ll be staying in Cuba! Drive yourself using the car you used in the last leg down Neptuno street in Havana, where you will find a guarapo stall with a flag.
Clue #2
Using the hand-press to crush sugarcane, make forty glasses of guarapo. Once all of the glasses have been successfully made, you’ll be handed your next clue.
Clue #3
Drive to the Tropicana Night Club for your next clue.
Clue #4
Roadblock: Who can make it and shake it?
For this challenge, one team member must follow the instructions of the costume designer to create a costume for one of the showgirls. If the costume is made correctly and given a pass, teams will be given their next clue.
Clue #5
Teams must drive to Aeropuerto de La Habana Ciudad Libertad, where you will embark on a charter flight to Key West, Florida, back in the United States. Once in Key West, teams must go to the southernmost point in the continental United States for their next clue.
Clue #6
Make your way to the Ernest Hemingway Home and Museum, where you’ll find your next clue.
Clue #7
Roadblock: Who is a reader, a writer, and a decipherer?
Ernest Hemingway, known for books like The Old Man and the Sea, had a notoriously bad handwriting, with little regards to punctuation or accuracy. One team member must copy one of Hemingway’s notes perfectly, letter for letter, on the provided typewriter. If it was typed perfectly, you will be handed a decoder key which you can use to find the hidden message, which will reveal the location of your final challenge.
Answer: Smathers Beach
Clue #8
Now that you’ve made it to Smathers Beach, you’ll partake in a final challenge. Out in between the marked buoys are bundles of letter tiles. You must dive down to retrieve them and bring them back up to shore. Figure out what you’re supposed to spell out with them, and once you think you have the answer, hang the tiles in order on your clothesline. If you have the correct answer, you’ll be given the final clue.
Answer: United States, Japan, South Korea, India, Oman, South Africa, Lesotho, Greece, North Macedonia, Cuba, United States (teams must figure out that they have to spell out all of the countries they visited in order on the race)
Clue #9
Congratulations! Make your way to the final pit-stop at Fort Zachary Cruise Pier! Go, go, go, the first team to reach the pit-stop will win 1 MILLION dollars!
Pit-Stop, Leg 12
10 countries
4 continents
over 27,000 miles
first: 1 million dollars

Ok It's Time for my . . . Annual Pre-Burning Man Rant and Predictions!!!
After 22+ years of attendance, I have watched this festival go from what was described by Wired Magazine in 1997 as, "what the internet would be like if it was happening in reality" to 2020 where, "What? In reality, this festival is happening on the internet" ?!? What a serious head fuck . . .
So strap in or strap on and get ready for disappointment . . . like virtually everything in this virtual world right now.
Here goes this year's Virtual Rant!
PREDICTIONS
The Virtual Burn is going the be everything you think it could be . . . an underwhelming and depressing reminder that you are not going the real Burning Man this year.
While it is still better than nothing, nothing is an extremely low bar. Get ready for a clusterfuck of 8 separately-produced interpretive video game dreamscapes, made by skilled teams of programmers eager to prove that their world-building technology will be able to make future financial investors a shitload of money.
Burning Man 2021 is a 50/50 chance at best. 2022 is not looking that great either. Between The Org burning cash on side projects, the FEDs wanting to crack down hard and the Bureau of Land Management clearly pretty fucking stoked that they did not have to deal with the whole shitshow this year, it's going to be an uphill battle for the festival to return.
Huge changes will need to be made.
Those few gluttons for punishment who do decide to go to the playa this week will be treated to Burning Man without the Burning Man Experience.
It will take all the hard work, organization and preparation for survival in the middle of a harsh desert environment for a week of Burning Man . . . just without the Burning Man.
If there is one silver lining of the event not happening this year, it's the fact that I don't have to pack up my dust covered Burning Man bullshit from last year, drive 19 hours, then have to smuggle drugs inside my ass to make it past the BLM rangers just go camping in one of the most fucking miserable and inhospitable places on earth.
Without Shirtcockers, Megaphones and Massive Thumping Soundsystems, it's just a bogus camping trip in bad weather with a shitload of cops.
This year we will NOT be seeing the usual post-Burn MASSSIVE FLOOD of social media posts from Burners who lost their nice $60 water bottle/container somewhere on the playa, often accompanied by a story of why this particular water container was of importance because it has a strap on it, followed by a brief description of unique camps stickers on it and a photo of said missing water bottle/container. In fact, while we are starting to think about cutting costs -- How about lost and found stops giving a fuck about your overpriced water bottle. You lost it, Becky . . . let it go. You spent 20 times More Money on Cocaine for the week than the price of your fucking stoopid-Smart-Bottle-container.
THE VIRTUAL BURN
This year’s Virtual Burn brings about more questions than it does answers.
How will Shirtcockers express their hatred of pants without a Burning Man? In a virtual world, they become no different than unsolicited dick pics.
How will Artcar Owners be able to swing their metaphorical dicks around without their Artcars booming Deep House music to show the world their girth. Sure, you can build one in the Minecraft world for this years Burn . . .But lets face it: No one is gonna be like "Who did that 3D CAD drawing, I totally wanna fuck them!"
What will all the Assholes with Megaphones do without Burners to heckle?
Without handheld amplified audio devices and wide-open spaces, they become no different than Internet Trolls.
How will Hippies on a Vision Quest be able find their spirit animal online? Without a guided shamanic ritual and Temple to burn, they become no different than someone playing Animal Crossing.
If there is no moop or trash to clean up in a virtual Burning Man how can Moop-shamers be able to prove to campmates and others that they are better at "doing Burning Man " than everyone else? In a virtual world they become no different than a Sarah McLaughlin Green Peace commercial.
How will Dooshbonnets and Dooshbags be able to gain followers on Instagram without the giant Robot Heart to climb?
How can they show the world that they not only have braved the pool of Piranhas chomping for position for line, negotiated past the all-seeing and all-knowing doorgirl with a clipboard, proving that they have climbed both the social and physical ladder to reach the top of the Robot Heart, so that they may look down upon the lowly dancefloor with both spite and pity for the unwashed masses who where not able achieve such greatness.
Without this accomplishment, they become no different than average Twitter users vying for Celebrity attention.
How will Burning Man DJs be able to disappoint us with poorly executed timing and bullshit Michael Jackson remixes? Without huge Soundsystems to bang out the worst in modern electronic music, DJs just become . . . The SAME TERRIBLE DJs just now on Twitch! #playatech #Djstreaming #Djsofburningman
Although each Virtual World must have been an amazing feat of programming in its scope and size, it kinda feels like a huge project that was done in a short amount of time. None of the Eight Worlds, in any way, reflect the typical Burning Man experience.
However, there are a few non-official super realistic Burning Man simulators out there.
By far the most realistic experience has to be the "Getting Out More This Year" Simulator.
The player is welcomed to a rich and tangible 3D World of Chris's DopeAss 70s RV, which is camped way out on 4:30 and H, where your avatar can spend all day and all night doing fun things like Ketamine, or other colorful interactive game play such as snorting Ketamine, and even interact with the virtual Chris’s chat box and watch his avatar do Ketamine.
Other game play options include doing Ketamine, talking about doing Ketamine and also doing Ketamine.
The more days and nights spent doing Ketamine, the higher the score! If you want to experience what a typical Burner really does the whole week, than this one is for you!!
Then we have: "Let's Go Party" . . . the online multi-player game where the objective is to get your group of more than 6 Burners to try and leave camp, and all go out to party together.
I did not have much fun playing. I was never able to leave the front of camp. 14 hours of game play later, Brenda still needs to go back for chapstick and Ricky can’t find his bag of blow. Then once Brenda arrives ready, Kaleporia is cold and needs a scarf. Darkwad David is going back to get some blinky lights for the 3rd time. Now Timmy can't find his cigarettes . . . Fuck.
“ManBun Boyfriend”. In this first person POV game, you (the ManBun) has little to no control within the game, with only a single "Ok, Sure" button to navigate within the world. The game play opens as the player is dragged out of bed at 6 AM by the onscreen girlfriend who takes you (the ManBun) on an treacherous journey of sunrise yoga classes, self help lectures, think and grow rich seminars, yoga, positive affirmation workshops, mindful guided mediations, yoga, healing arts ceremonies, wellness and well-being talks, yoga, vegan lifestyle in the new age conferences, yoga, mindful-and-wellness-group-chat and also yoga.
Extra points if you can score a selfie in front of the Giant BELIEVE letters!!
After 8 grueling hours of game play, it simply flashes a screen where girlfriend says "I'm Tired", and the “ManBun Boyfriend” simulator then restarts game play to opening sequence.
“DJs Girlfriend”. This simulation offers a similar experience to “ManBun Boyfriend”. However, in this first person POV game, you (the DJs Girlfriend) is invited to Follow "Dj GlockTrigger" on a dubstep-and-monster-energy-drink-filled adventure as you (the DJs Girlfriend) is rushed from empty dancefloor to empty dancefloor, while picking up extra points if you can find him a "line of blow". After 12 hours of game play the screen flashes "Hey babe I'm gonna go drink with the boyies" and game play is reset.
THE RANT
I am not that great at finance. Obviously. I’ve been to Burning Man 22 times. That should tell you enough about my poor financial / life choices.
But even this burnout Burner can do the math and see that the Burning Man Org is in financial trouble.
Burning Man may need to sell out to save itself. It would not be the first time..
Burning Man "sold out" to the PsyTrance community in 1997. To help ticket sales, the Bay Area was flooded with seriously lame underproduced Rave flyers. Or maybe Dr. Dre can toss in a few million to keep The Org afloat once again.
Or hey why don't we start tickling Elon Musk's balls again, and see if we can start choking on his shaft in return for some sweet corporate demon semen sponsorship.
The Org has already gone pinky finger deep with him. Like when Tesla brought out a full-on Electric Car Expo. That's right, in 2007, at Burning Man, right at fucking Esplanade & 9:00, they had what can only be described as an “anonymous car dealership” from “the green future”, complete with lengthy-worded displays filled with lofty promises of clean energy, infused with subtle corporate propaganda.
In the center of the exhibit sat a life-size solid black plastic model Tesla car.
As well as someone on guard 24/7 to make sure no one tagged or fucked with the stoopid thing. I personally got chased out for drawing a dick in the DUST on the window! All I know is they should have burnt it down or blew it up by the end of the week, but that lame ass mother fucker was still there on Sunday when I journeyed back to draw a dick on it again -- this time with a PAINT PEN. After executing a perfect fat-sacked-choad-headed-donger on the hood, I was once again chased out by rangers, this time with pitchforks screaming bloody murder for my head!!
Fuck you, Ranger Doug! You will never be able to prove that was Me!!!
So Look, it's not the first time The Org spread its asscheeks for a little bit of corporate dick on the side. They also bent over back in 2013 and let Mark Fucking Zuckerberg bring a Giant Golden 'LIKE' sculpture out there. I just hope they did the right thing by the end of week and it was killed with fire.
SO we know The Org is corporateBiCurious. Time to snuggle up, get out of the corporate cocksucking closet and cash in on the fact that this place sold out a long time ago.
Start flirting with attractive corporate entities like Mark Z, the Google Boys, Elon, Tommy Boy from Myspace, or maybe even P-Diddy to toss in some cash to get this fucking party started again!
Yo, Elon! How can we have Burning Man on Mars in 2050 as planned, if we can’t keep it going on Earth for the next 30 years?
At this point, The Org can spread their legs in the backseat of that Tesla and change next years theme to Space-X. I could give a FUCK!!!!! As long as we can keep Old Naked Dudes On Bikes rolling free.
Let some of these cocksucking limpdick corporations like Doritos -- who have already profited from using our Artcars and culture in a their fabricated commercials -- actually fucking pay us money and we will let them shoot a real commercial out there. Have fun pixelating the nipples out of the background actors. I COULD GIVE A FUCK as long as Shirtcockers have a natural habitat to dongslap and roam free. Let Brazzers.com build the Temple! I sincerely really don't care what they do . . . as long as Assholes with Megaphones have wide open spaces to heckle Burners in the Black Rock Desert like GOD intended.
BACK TO BASICS : THE FESTIVAL WILL NEED TO RESEST
Maybe The Org will stop fisting themselves in the burnhole with all the Cultural-Direction-Bullshit and get down to brass tax here.
They have spent years trying to market the festival as a family-friendly-non-offensive-all-inclusive-experience for the suburban upperclass while still catering to the super elite.
We need The Org to provide the DPW and Tickets . . .
Not for Cultural Direction, or Large Scale Art Funding Circle Jerks, Abstract Charity Causes, International Involvement, or any of the Meaningless Feel-Good Propaganda tools they use to control the image of the festival!
The number one focus from here on out needs to be the festival itself taking place once again in Black Rock City!
This defacto-defunding of The Org is a blessing. Look, when it comes down to it, it's not about the lame fucking themes each year. It's about the Burners who come and contribute to the festival that makes it special.
It’s not about overpriced art grants, or Rich-Dick Theme Camp placement priorities. It about the shitty unofficial un-themed camp at 7:00 and J blaring Discotrance music on a distorted soundsystem while giving away room temperature margaritas!
I could give a fuck about all of the elaborate expensive blinking bullshit! Cuts cost! Make the Burning Man effigy from toothpicks for all I give a fuck. None of that shit really matters. The spirit of Burning Man is in the person giving away ice cream from a cooler out in deep playa on a hot afternoon.
The soul of the festival is in Old Naked Dudes on a Bikes rolling free across the desert!
The heart of the festival is the Nightmare Hippy Chick on Acid rolling around in the dust, screaming about her spirit vegetable.
Believe me if The Org had its way, Burning Man would be nothing but Transformational Mediation Seminars, Yoga Classes, Ultra Overpriced Sculptures, and TED talks about how to get rich quick selling a new type of investment portfolio.
I am perfectly happy with the crappy bars and half-assed theme camps that are there just to have a good time. We don't need The Org's unique brand of new age capital-elitism bullshit.
They have clearly dropped the ball on the Cultural Direction for years, and the less they steer the ship, the better, cuz we have already washed up on the rocks.
BULLSHIT CLICKBAIT
“Top 10 Burning Man Pictures You Must See To Believe!”
And once clicked, sure enough it’s nothing but a bunch of super basic-ass photos of some super-hot-Coachella-swinger-couple at sunset in front of the most gentrified “OMG I need to get a selfie in front that to show my followers on Instagram” artwork on the playa.
You already know exactly where these fucksticks took the stoopid photo is front of, OF fucking course it's in front of the BELIEVE letters. It’s Basically the "live, laugh, love" of playa art.
Really, I won't believe this ?!
What I won't believe is that their relationship is going to last beyond next week . . . cuz there’s a 90% chance they are gonna join the wrong gangbang at the Orgy Dome and suddenly someone is not happy about the amount of buttfucking the other one received.
Thanks Business Insider Magazine for exposing the public to the wild and crazy world that is Burning Man. Now every fucking Chad and Becky from Wall Street is trying to come here to get laid. "Bro if I was there I would bang so many Hot Chicks on top of those letters" . . . "OMG I LOVE those Letters!! We are SOOO going to Burning Man to meet our future husbands <3."
How about 10 REAL photos you won’t believe?
Too bad the cameras weren’t there to snap a picture of the guy who took a shower with a fat chick and midget porn star!
It’s a shame no one from the Daily Mail UK was there to catch video of the guy who was tripping his nuts off and could not figure out how to unlock the door of the porta-potty -- escaping only by busting through the plastic roof and climbing out the top several hours later.
Or how about that chick at the meditation camp that was able to summon a higher power of consciousness and transcended the spacetime continuum for a short/infinite amount of time!
Where the fuck was BoredPanda.com to catch a photo of the person who was hit with a rubber dildo when it was carelessly thrown from the top of the Space Pirate ship into the Mayan Warrior crowd.
Now That’s some real stuff that happens out there that I would be happy to clickbait on!
THERE WILL BE SOME CHANGES MADE
The Large Scale Art:
Instead of funding massive installations that end up being resold to casinos on the Las Vegas strip, why not treat them like large Rich-Dick Theme Camps -- give the Installation Artists 200 DGS Tickets, and in return, these assholes will be happy to spend shitloads of money on blinky light towers or whatever, just so they can lock in those sweet sweet reserved tickets for themselves and their friends.
The Tone:
The Utopian Blinkylight Dreamscape has been cool for the past 16 years . . . Buuuut . . . it has gradually fallen out of touch with the world around us.
For far too long, The Org has ignored camps or underfunded art that could be perceived as dark or controversial in any way, shape or form.
Yet again, another example of their Cultural Direction Tactics to market Burning Man as a blinky-light-mickey-mouse-Epcot-Center for wealthy-business-insiders-and-celebrities featuring a safespace-family-oriented-wholesome-body-wellness-green-living-environment for social-media-influencer-photo-shoots.
Burning Man has NEVER been a Safe place!
In 1998, I witnessed a beheading by guillotine at the Opera Performance that was so realistic I spent the next 5 hours (still frying balls on acid!) convinced that Billy Graham was right about this place being a Satanic death cult that would bring about the end of the world.
IT WAS DISTURBING!
If the Barbie Death Camp incident at last years’ Burn taught us anything, it is that there clearly need to be risky and controversial works of art at the festival.
We can't be having pussy-footed Australians throwing temper tantrums like little punk bitches CUZ they don't like the way someone put Barbie Dolls inside an oven!
Why did that do-good-koala-humping-limpdick-ASS-licker think it was OK? Well . . .The Org has shoved the narrative that Burning Man is strictly "good vibes only" down our fucking throats so deep that we finally gagged from it.
Why the fuck was that guy even there? Well, he clicked on the Business Insiders’ “Top Ten Burning Man Photos You Must See To BELIEVE” and thought it was gonna be nothing but butterfly sculptures and Instagram Models in front of giant letters.
No Kids:
Yep. Sorry Minecraft Burners, but you are gonna have to wait until you are 21 to come to this party!
Renegotiating the insurance policy as an over-21 festival will save The Org millions and millions of dollars.
Out of 80,000 people, less than .05% are under 21 . . .yet we have to check IDs at every fucking bar !?
Every year the gate gets closed down and no one can filter in or out because someone asshole can't find their kid. This should be a HUGE red flag !
Law Enforcement uses the fact that minors are allowed at the event as justification to engage in predatory conduct such as undercover stings, camp raids and random tickets for unsuspecting bartenders who forget to check IDs.
Also I am not comfortable with the legal grey area the Shirtcocking and Titbouncing in the presence of minors creates.
And if it ever comes down to nudity versus allowing kids, I am sorry but we can't sacrifice the heart of this festival on account of the fact that you don't want to get a fucking babysitter for the week.
Your kids could give a flying-donald-duck-fuck about Burning Man! You and I both know goddamn well that given the opportunity they would rather play video games for the week at grandma's house then have to listen to Mom and Dad fight at Burning Man all week about who got buttfucked by whom at the Orgy Dome. . .
LEAVE THEM AT HOME!!!!!!
So the rest of us can be free to fuck, drink, smoke and wave our goddamn dicks and clits around whereever we see fit!!!
The Temple:
In the early days of the David Best Temples, they were constructed from the leftover hollows of wooden dinosaur jigsaw puzzle pieces.
It was low cost, recycled and pretty fucking cool!
Last year’s Temple was overdesigned, structurally unsound, and made from rare rustic-oak hardwood and redwood trees imported from China.
Let’s cut costs and just do what those guys from Belgium did in 2005. It's a Very Simple Plan. We get a shitload of old 2x4 boards and fucking Wing It! The Belgium Waffle House would have made a perfectly good Temple.
Garbage Dumpsters:
Yep, that's right. In the future we will have dumpsters at Burning Man! All the Survivalist and Moop-shaming Burners say it will destroy the festival. Guess what, Burn Nut? It's already common practice for larger theme camps to rent dumpsters that are emptied at the end of the week!! It's been going on for YEARS! So what?
Theme Camps will now have to pay a dumpster fee and there will be strict rules around any public dumpsters. Believe me The Org will provide the minimum amount possible to accommodate the BLM. It won't be nearly enough dumpsters for everyone to just toss all their trash, recycling and extra bikes into.
Don't worry, Radical Self-Reliant Survivalist Burnertypes, other people will still have to suffer packing up and dealing with their own trash on the ride home. Moop-shamers rejoice! You will definitely still be able to shame people for mooping and not cleaning up, if not even more so now. I don't see why we can't be Radically Self-Reliant by having dumpsters on site. We will still Leave No Trace, while leaving one less thing for surrounding communities to bitch about.
Build the Wall !!!
Ya fuck it! Build the Wall. So what? Honestly, it will be more aesthetically pleasing than that fucking orange fence. And if that is what the Feds want, that's cool with me -- as long as The Org gets to choose who does Security!
Thank fucking god we are not doing Burning Man this year.
With the world on fire all around us, it seems a bit tone-def to hold a giant rave utopia party!
I, for one, will be enjoying the week indoors under air-conditioning and rolling around in the heaps of cash I am saving by not going. I’m not attending a single workshop to expand my consciousness, not giving a single gift to anyone, and not being radical or self-reliant in any way.
Fuck your Virtual Burn.
I am Zapper Jones. I will see you in the Dust again . . . Sometime Somewhere in the Future!

• Tony says he feels "really, really great" and "well prepared" about their first episode.
  
• Feels like they're getting amazing press. With the help of TNT/Warner Media, they've had advertising through podcasts, social media, Facebook ads, mainstream TV ads (NFL, HBO, "wrestling TV"), airports, movie theater trailers, etc.
  
• Since watching the shows from gorilla, while also producing, is different from just watching the shows live, Tony makes sure to always watch the shows back (usually the next day), and plans to continue that for TV. Mentions that he watched Fight for the Fallen after he watched WWE Extreme Rules, and was "blown away by how much better our show was" and felt like that was one of AEW's weaker shows.
  
• Says Double or Nothing is "the most commercially and critically successful wrestling pay-per-view" of the year. Cites doing over 110,000 buys at the price point they set, for their first ever show, while not having any TV to build it up. Happy with how well All Out did, despite the challenges of losing Jon Moxley to a MRSA infection 10 days before.
  
• Top-5 issues he's had with their shows (in no particular order):
  
  • 1. The Double or Nothing Casino Battle Royale started out flat, because they wanted to build towards a moment with MJF and Shawn Spears (that would factor into the future animosity between them), but the downside is that their first impression suffered because of it.
  • 2. They could have (and were supposed to) handle the chairshot from Shawn Spears to Cody better, but it didn't go off as planned. Thankfully Cody was okay, and thought the Cody/Shawn Spears feud was fantastic.
  • 3. The Hangman Page vs. Kip Sabian match should not have gone as long as it did. He regrets not having cut 5 minutes from it, plus it went 2 minutes longer than it was supposed to. Felt like it dragged, and didn't do anyone any favors (thinks it should have gone 12-13, not 17-19 minutes).
  • 4. Losing Jon Moxley to MRSA, but think they handled that as well as they could. Really glad Jon's okay, and they're focused on Moxley vs Omega going forward.
  • 5. Concedes that the Buy-In shows probably shouldn't have so much comedy when the main card is so serious.
• As far as TV goes, you can still expect to see the arenas set up in a similar way, great wrestling matches, and a high production value. You probably won't see things like the Moxley vs Janela match.
  
• Tonight's countdown special on TNT is designed to help introduce AEW to new viewers. They suspect that a lack of wrestling on Tuesday night (for the first time in a long time) will lead to viewers seeking out wrestling programming on TV.
  
• While a lot of people will show up for a TV premiere, if you don't deliver then they might not show up for Week 2. He "wants Week 2 to be just as big of an event as Week 1, and Week 3 to be just as big as Week 1 and 2, and so forth." They're planning on "rolling out huge things every week."
  
• Talks about the importance of Being the Elite - and how AEW wouldn't exist without it - despite it being a very different tone from AEW's shows. Says the "Road to" series will probably be more in-line with the tone they're going for for their shows. Says there's nothing wrong with having a sketch comedy show on YouTube, and a serious wrestling show on TV (which isn't to say that they'll never have comedic segments).
  
• Doesn't want to insult people's intelligence. Against "invisible cameras" and doesn't want to rely on "DQ's," "ridiculous ref bumps," and "distraction roll-ups" too often.
  
• His own personal wrestling influences are wide-ranging, dating as far back as the WWWF, and including Memphis, Mid-South, 90s New Japan and All Japan, and 2010s New Japan (references Kenny Omega, Prince Devitt, and Kota Ibushi). Says he shares common interests with Cody regarding Jim Crockett Promotions, WCW, and Mid-Atlantic; and common interests with Kenny Omega and the Young Bucks with Japanese wrestling.
  
• Even though "they all have different tastes in wrestling," they have a "similar mindset for what is good and what is bad." "90+% of the time" when one of them thinks they have a good idea, they all agree.
  
• Hopes to grow the audience by putting on a great show, rather than trying to cater to specific demographics.
  
• Designed to be more sports-based, but that doesn't mean they will lack drama (just like traditional sports aren't devoid of drama). Stories will stem from "wrestling in the ring," "personal issues," and "grudges" - with less focus on the "preposterous" and "ridiculous."
  
• Wasn't surprised to see to see NXT go head-to-head with AEW on TV. Says that if AEW ran Tuesdays, he would have suspected NXT would move to that day (and says that arguably would have made more sense for NXT, since moving Smackdown to Fridays and potentially losing those Tuesday viewers).
  
• While the shows will be wrestling-heavy, they will still have promos ("We have Chris Jericho and Jon Moxley: it would be insane not to let these guys talk") - "just not ridiculous, scripted promos."
  
• Doesn't want to "over-produce" the commentary. While he has chimed in "a handful of times" for things to say - and while he regrets some things that have been said - he likes that it feels "real" and "organic."
  
• Wants to have a show that's focused "in and around the ring" (compares to how the UFC is presented). Doesn't like so much focus on what's happening backstage.
  
• Since the show is TV-14, they are being given more leeway and are being encouraged to be themselves and "be edgy."
  
• In regards to WWE, they're not attempting to "counter-program" them or anything, but aren't above poking fun. They just don't want it to "become a habit" or "become a theme of the show." He was fine with Cody smashing the throne, because it came from his personal experiences. Says they're a "challenger brand," and while there isn't just one competitor, "there's one obvious competitor that we're always going to be compared to, for the foreseeable future." He doesn't think that's necessarily a bad thing, but actually a good thing - "especially after Monday."
  
• Wants wrestlers to appear authentic. In regards to their characters, he doesn't want people to do things that they don't believe themselves. He's against writing dialogue for wrestlers, and thinks it can just result in them coming off as bad actors.
  
• Says he's been "waiting for this moment for a really long time." In regards to the start date, he says that he's "known for a year and a half that this day is coming, and I could have told you that it was either going to be today or tomorrow." Cannot legally get into specifics, but says he has a "long-term," "multi-year" commitment with TNT.
  
• In regards to wrestling being looked down upon by TNT in the past, he says that "absence makes the heart grow fonder." Says he was able to demonstrate factual numbers and patterns to say that "TNT had a big wrestling audience, and we can have one again. We're going to have one. We're going to have it tomorrow and we're going to have it a long time."
  
• Committed to doing big, quarterly PPVs. Also interested in other big events (like the CEO-partnered Fyter Fest, and the charity fundraising Fight for the Fallen) that they can put out either through BRLive or streaming. Double or Nothing will always be held Memorial Day weekend in Las Vegas. All Out will always be held Labor Day weekend in the Chicago area. Full Gear has a chance to be the big, winter quarterly show (didn't necessarily seem to be as committed to the idea of it staying in the Baltimore area).
  
• Says the ITV deal was not supposed to be announced (sounds very annoyed with this situation). They had replays scheduled for Sunday/Monday, "but they're still working on getting the show on earlier." He fully expects "this week" that they'll be up before that. It was just announced prematurely before everything was fully hammered out. "Hopefully stay tuned and we'll have some good news soon."
  
• In regards to planning out TV, especially further down the line: "It's going to be way harder than we thought. It's going to be really hard, I know it's going to be, but it's not going to be the first time I've tried to do something I haven't done before. I think we have good aptitudes for this. I think it's going to be a challenge, and I don't expect it to be easy at all - believe me - but I do think we're going to pull it off and I think it's going to go great."
  
• Agrees that wrestlers work best when they're amplified versions of their own personalities, but that's not necessarily always going to be the case (cites Kenny Omega's recent character change as not really being true to who Kenny is as a person).
  
• Says that overall he's a lot less nervous with AEW than he is with the Jaguars or Fulham, because a lot more things are under his control.
  
• In regards to keeping kayfabe on social media, says that he doesn't necessarily think it's a big deal and he trusts his performers to handle it well. He has had to talk to people a couple times in regards to bad things they've said on social media, but generally that isn't an issue. Says that could change a bit once they're doing weekly TV. Wade Keller seems to be of the mindset that wrestlers should always be "on," but Tony doesn't necessarily seem to agree (he gives the example of the media scrums not being done in kayfabe, and it being fine because it's clearly separate from the PPV).
  
• As far as being wrestler-friendly, they'll have a relatively light schedule (every Wednesday this year, other than Christmas, plus Full Gear on a Saturday). Not everyone on the roster is going to be on every show - by design to give people time off and breaks for a healthier work/life balance. If it's a "reasonable request," he will allow wrestlers to work independent dates outside of AEW. They also have a tuition-matching program for people looking to get an education (says that he believes WWE also offers that, but it would be very difficult to work that around WWE's schedule), and some wrestlers are able to have careers outside of wrestling, as well (such as Britt Baker's dentistry, who he would never want to force to be on the road for 5 days out of the week). Many wrestlers also work various in-office position with AEW.
  
• Doesn't want to be a "control freak," and is very open to feedback and suggestions from wrestlers. They try to have producers and coaches that are very agreeable guys to work with (cites Jerry Lynn and Dean Malenko), and he would rather say "yes" than "no" to a wrestler's idea.
  
• In regards to AEW forcing WWE to make a better on-air product, he says "that is already clearly happening." "Yes, I do expect they will have to make some changes to their shows to accommodate some things that we're doing, like, for example pyro, I don't think it's a coincidence that pyro came back." "When there's a competitive wrestling market it's better for the fans, it's definitely better for the wrestlers, and I think it's better for the companies, too, because the competition not only brings the best out of both companies, but the market it creates - let's face it, people are very excited with what's going on between AEW and WWE."
  
• Wants to do with the women's division what WCW did with the cruiserweight division: notably with the joshi and how they interact with the western women.
  
• Thinks his roster is as good as what any other brand has on TV in regards to in-ring skill and personality.
  
• In regards to the recent RAW ending, "if people like that: great. It seemed like a lot of people didn't, but I'm sure there's some people that did, and I don't begrudge those people for liking it. Different people like different things in wrestling - everyone's entitled to their opinion." Goes on to say that he would never ban anyone from the arena for wearing a wrestling shirt from another promotion, and just thinks it's cool that you're wearing a wrestling shirt, period.
  
• Defining success, he says that it's more subjective with AEW than his other sports teams. They've set benchmarks, internal targets, and network targets as goals. "I would like for this show to have a good audience and for this show to be on for many years. I would like to make the wrestling business a better place, as we've already done in 2019, I'd still like to be doing that in the future." "I would like for us to be a profitable company. I expect to make back everything I've invested and then some. When we're making profits it'll be that much sweeter."
  
• No plans for house shows this year, and when they do start doing them it will not be every weekend. Never wants to be running 5-6 days a week. He'd "like to settle into doing somewhere between 85 and 125 dates a year... but again, every person doesn't need to be on every show, and I don't really see why anyone would be wrestling 100 times a year or more, for us."
  

Sometimes you make choices in life that dictate your every move until the day you die. I made one of those choices. Sometimes, these decisions can ruin your life, make you not even want to finish it if you know what I mean. Mine was that kind.
I used to be an escort, not to be confused with a prostitute, although at the bare bones of it they are the exact same thing. Women, hired for their bodies. Prostitutes usually just for sex but escorts, they are performers, actresses… I’ve been someone's wedding date, multiple men's girlfriends at charity events, and even someone's sister used to trick their wife into a sick threeway. I guess it was safe since he wouldn't leave her for his own sister... That being said, at the end of the day, they all want the same thing, and they pay me A LOT of money for it. Unlike prostitutes that pick up random johns from street corners, I had a little black book of clientele. 12 to be exact when I got out of the business. That may sound like a lot but most of these clients only needed me for a week or two out of the year. A week at the Aspen cabin, memorial weekend on a yacht. I only had five that I saw weekly. A girl needs her off days.
By now you are probably judging me pretty hard and that’s fine. The way you feel about me now won’t compare to how you'll see me after I tell you about my last client. He was my bad decision. The choice that now rules over my life.
My number one client of three years had just died in a car accident. He was my cash cow, a business executive that was too busy for a wife but wanted company once or maybe twice a week. I charged 800 an hour and he would hire me for the whole night so you can imagine how much money I lost after his death. He needed to be replaced, and fast.
There are a lot of ways to get new clients. I started out at casinos, watching for big winners, but in 2020 the best way by far is the dark web. I’m going to assume you don’t know a lot about the dark web as most people don’t. There are a lot of misconceptions but honestly, it's just a whole bunch of people offering services that the government and society have deemed immoral and illegal, fucking prudes. Of course, you could run across someone with malicious intent just like you could at a restaurant, Walmart, or even church. You just have to be safe and take all the necessary precautions.
I obviously couldn’t be too picky at this time. I definitely wasn’t going to find a client as wealthy as Donny right off the bat so I was willing to take any job at that point. I posted my services in the usual escort forum I had worked with before, and after about a month and six degrading jobs that I was forced to drop my rate for later, I received an email requesting services but the details would be discussed in person.
Even on the dark web, this is a strange request, but not unheard of. One of my first clients from the web had the same request just so he could prove to me he wasn't a weirdo before asking if he could bite my toenails. He was actually a very sweet guy. Later he had lost his job so I just let him do it for free since it saved me a trip to the salon. Maybe this new guy just has some weird fetish. My response was, “ I agree to the meeting but am not accepting the job until the details are agreed upon.” He sent back the address for the coffee shop downtown, and time, 9 am the next day.
I instantly walked up to the counter to order my iced mocha. I don’t talk business before coffee. I take a sip as I scan the room for someone that looks like they are here to meet an escort. "Maybe that guy in all black sitting awkwardly in the corner with no cup." I thought. I sit across from the man that looks as though he has never been in a coffee shop before. "You should have at least ordered a coffee. You wouldn’t look so awkward." I teased. "I don’t drink coffee." He responded with a flat voice. "Then why didn’t we meet somewhere you could be more comfortable," I asked. "It’s about your comfort." He answered.
Something about him told me he was a very sheltered man. We get a lot of those type so you can tell most of the time. What bothered me the most was the lack of emotion in his eyes. They were just, dead.
"That’s a sweet gesture but I don’t need to be buttered up. We’re here for business. What is your business?" I demanded. He sat back in his chair, somewhat amused. "Well, obviously you offer certain services and I mean to hire you, for my boss."
"Your boss?" I asked. "Yes", he said pulling an envelope out of his pocket. "He is throwing a gala of sorts this weekend and would like women of your, caliber to attend. It's to celebrate and raise money for an event that only comes around every five thousand years. We have already hired other female entertainment as well. He placed the envelope on the table. "Ok, so what’s the catch? A mere gala doesn’t require this much secrecy." I stated. "Yes, the catch. Well, really there is no catch. The boss will want some company after and maybe even during the gala, which is where you come in. He is paying ten thousand up front, and the other ten after the Gala. The only thing is, he has some deformities."
I sat and thought about the word deformities for a moment. If I were shallow I wouldn't have made it this far in my career. Most of my clients lean more towards what you would call unattractive anyway, plus twenty thousand dollars is a lot of money. "Well, honestly, it doesn’t matter what he looks like as long as you’re not hiring me to fuck a retard or anything," I said.
The man smiled for the first time since the conversation started. "No no, nothing like that. He is a completely competent and consenting adult." He responded. "He just looks a little different."
After weighing my pros and cons, I agreed to the terms and the meeting ended with him writing down an address and casually walking out leaving behind the envelope with ten thousand dollars cash. I was more than happy.
The day of the gala came and I put on my best gown and pearls, wondering what cause it was for. The last one I attended was to raise money to clean up the oil spill in the gulf. Whatever it was, I did like helping even if I was only there to fuck some deformed guy. When I arrived I was instantly amazed at how big the house was. It was really more of a castle, to be honest. It towered over me like a brick skyscraper from the 1600s. I was greeted at the door by a man in a black cloak which, I thought was kind of weird but ignored. "The lord of the house welcomes you". The man said in the strangest accent I'd ever heard. "Lord?" I thought. "Maybe I should try to put this guy in my book. He would be the ONLY one I need with money like this." As I finished my thought, I heard a scream echo from within the house. It was at this point I became nervous. Before I knew it I was guided into the house by the man, not knowing that my life was about to change, forever.
Upon entering, I was immediately caught off guard. Everyone, wearing black cloaks except the rest of the entertainment which was a mix of upper-class debutants and freshly plucked hookers. It finally clicks. This is a cult! I look around and see, well, normal people drinking and having a good time, and in the back of the room, a 20-foot high red metal door. I strained my eyes to try to identify the markings.
"I'm glad you could make it." The man from the meeting said as he took my arm guiding me through the crowd. "Yes, of course. We do have a business agreement." I forced out with a shutter my voice. "A woman of her word. I love it! You don’t find many of those these days." He said with more confidence then he should have. "Um, what the fuck." I thought. Before I could respond he started again. "The boss has already had a long night and has retired to his study. He requested your company upon arrival."
Before I knew it I was standing in front of the big red metal door. The sound of it opening paralyzed me as I was pushed through the threshold into the dim room. The door slammed behind me, echoing through the room and my soul. "I'm so scared." I thought. "I want to leave but I can't move."
"Hello." The voice radiated through my body. It added so much more to my fear. His is silhouette rose from the chair in the corner confusing me because of its shape. "I've been expecting you." The voice said as if it were spoken by multiple people at the same time. "Expecting me? Or, or anyone?" I squeaked. "Everyone." He replied quickly. The man emerges from the shadows revealing he's not, simply deformed, nor is he simply, a man.
Its scaly grey hands reached out grabbing both of my arms. I couldn't move. The creature pulled me in close, running its snout down my neck. His warm breath melted my chills away. "I apologize for the heat, I'm warm-blooded." He explained. I couldn't take my focus off his horns. They were beautiful. "Why did I feel this way?" I questioned. I could feel myself, dripping... I prayed for the beast to mount me like the animal it was. Mercifully, it granted my wish.
Who knew heaven was so close to hell?
I came to my senses in the foyer with a group of other women who also appeared to be waking up from a sex coma. Somehow I was already holding my Jacket and purse so I walked straight towards the exit. As I walked past the man from the meeting he said, "See you next week..."
I pulled into my driveway before realizing I had driven the hr and a half in complete silence. I didn't remember driving home… I didn't remember going to sleep… I do remember waking up the next morning and downing two plan B pills with a shot of jack. After finishing the bottle, I went back to sleep.
I woke up to the sounds of growling. "Was that my stomach?" I didn’t feel hungry. I felt bloated and sick, and my head was fucking killing me. I took a Lortab, ate, and went back to sleep. I slept from Friday to Wednesday and woke up with extreme pain. I thought maybe it was bathroom pains, but I couldn't go. The hot tube was the only thing that helped. I couldn't get the water hot enough. After the pain had dulled down to about a 3 out of 10, I fell asleep. I woke up in terror after noticing how extended my belly was. I looked nine months pregnant. I felt a surge of pain every time a bulge moved across my stomach. As I screamed in Pain, 4 cloaked men surrounded the hot tub. I passed out as they were lifting me out of the bloody water.
"You need to push or hell claw his way out!" I heard a faint voice yell.
I woke up with my legs spread as I lay on my kitchen table. "PUSH!" a voice said. I felt all of the pain release from my body into the arms of this, cloaked man. After a moment I heard the snarls from the tiny creature.
"We're done here." one of the cloaked figures said. "Go to the hospital and have to explain, or stay here, maybe survive, your choice... No one's going to believe the truth."
I laid there as they left the room. As he turned the corner, I got a glimpse of the baby… He really was a monster... I didn't want to get up. I didn't care if I lived. I closed my eyes and went to sleep.
I woke up on my kitchen table, sore but able to walk. I took a shower, ate some fruity pebbles, and pretty much ignored the fact I was probably internally bleeding due to giving birth to the antichrist. It was when I remembered I needed to drain the bloody hot tub that I found this little guy. Twins apparently. This one must have been born before the goon squad showed up. The poor thing couldn't climb his way out. He’s actually kind of cute when you get used to him. His teeth are sharp but they can't pierce rubber gloves. He’s easily maintained and just eats raw beef or pork. He's growing fast and I worry about that. How many more of him are there? What's going to happen when they're grown? What should I do with it?

This is a compilation of all the posts by user ar_david_hh who summarises anti-Corruption news of the day along with other interesting news in one comment. It is linked from the sidebar->Interesting Threads->Anti-corruption. The list is ordered by date, newest first. Date format: D/M/YYYY. All credit goes to the sub's hero ar_david_hh
Previous compilation threads: Part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5
Azerbaijan attacked Artsakh on 27 September 2020, making the war to be the main topic, the updates since this date are to be found in the daily Megathreads pinned at the top of the sub for now.

• 25/9/2020 news: \ Tsarukyan arrested \ ARM-AZE diplomatic spat \ parks or garages? \ NSS busts officials \ police brutality investigations \ mass unrest: mayor vs GasProm \ Parliament stats \ fake news busted \ officials sacked \ COVID news \ economy & wages \ hide and seek \ science
  
• 24/9/2020 news: \ shipping cost plummets \ free speech \ police reform \ Tsarukyan: voter bribe, gold mine, trial \ Vedi reservoir \ consumer prices \ Kocharyan lawyer in trouble \ HHK tatik drops diss-track \ NSS agent & officials busted \ 25th COVID aid \ resignations \ Azeri \ more
  
• 23/9/2020 news: \ education reforms: Armenian language \ liberated Anvakh outpost \ MFAs clash \ Armenia-Saudi relations \ job & salary stats \ real estate grows \ EU sends $ \ BHK officials \ Amulsar activists \ police & cadastre reforms \ mask ads \ Yerevan vs illegal construction
  
• 21/9/2020 news: \ tech industry grows \ Pashinyan blasts Aliyev for "falsifying history" \ Israeli arms dealer & Aliyev's offshore laundromats \ solar energy \ crosswalks to have lights \ trials: Mishik, Kocharyan, Tsarukyan \ opposition prepares huge rally \ many more stories inside...
  
• 21/9/2020 holiday report: \ 1991 flashback: independence \ battle of Arara \ army news: Aliyev's delusions, drone, panic, draft, Armenian exercise \ TUMO to expand in Artsakh \ NSS boss comments the Russian Dossier \ fires \ tourism & wine \ athletes win big \ Tslik Amram ancient castle
  
• 18/9/2020 news: \ Russian dossier: Kremlin's anti-Pashinyan agents \ polls: bribery encounter, business investments \ officials & bribers busted \ Tsarukyan's workers upset \ anti-vaxx story \ Armenian Stock Exchange \ border villages \ archaeologists \ ARM-GEO deal \ MFA \ meat for RUS
  
• 17/9/2020 news: \ TUMO expansion: labs & nano-tech \ anti-corruption: officials to disclose purchases \ oppo vs govt: verbal battle \ busted: rector & cops \ clinics+ \ PM intervenes \ COVID is back? \ tourism sights \ Human Capital Index \ bills pass: free lawyer, genocide calls \ debt
  
• 16/9/2020 news: \ education reforms: Minister & opposition locked in a fierce battle \ Pashinyan about judges, COVID \ irrigated lands \ drivers in Russia \ USA trade \ sheep production \ ozone & nature \ paternity leave \ FDIC insurance \ doctors protest \ Hrant Dink \ cattle cave
  
• 15/9/2020 news: \ unified transport & payment network \ rivers that flow to AZE \ geopolitics \ Kocharyan's money \ new Constitutional Court judges \ anti-corruption \ Central Bank: GDP, inflation, interest \ nature protection \ it's nuts! \ COVID news \ the church \ pump those numbers
  
• 14/9/2020: \ election fraud: BHK's factory \ Kocharyan & $600m \ foreign affairs: USA, RUS, AZE events, shots fired \ economic freedom index \ parliament grills wannabe judges \ berries (lol) \ music & culture \ COVID \ school begins \ infrastructure \ Yerevan's metro, buses, elevators
  
• 13/9/2020 news: \ post-July Battles in Tavush: border farming & irrigation expands \ re: new law about draft evaders \ car exports: Armenian drivers in Russia \ more athletes to receive pensions \ COVID \ female boss \ trolls in Baku \ Social Progress score \ Խաչվերաց \ videos \ sports
  
• 11/9/2020: \ details emerge about mass-alcohol poisoning \ 2000 assassination attempt of Artsakh prez \ draft-dodgers could get a chance \ USA talks investments \ anti-corruption busts \ INTERPOL & foreign affairs \ infrastructure & roads \ COVID rules change \ airlines resume \ exports
  
• 10/9/2020: \ reforms to reduce waiting times, fees \ agriculture \ renewable energy goal \ COVID news \ jobs & salaries++ \ Belarus protest \ Urartian m'lady \ fiber-optic network: GEO vs AZE \ BHK backtracks abortion ban? \ re: Emil Gazaz \ anti-corruption busts \ m'lady Aurora \ ...
  
• 9/9/2020 news: \ birthrate up \ paid paternity leave \ BHK's abortion ban \ "real" car inspection \ Japanese tech to clean Sevan \ a Georgian drama \ many diasporan repatriates \ economic stats \ import tariffs \ no psycho judges \ high-profile anti-corruption busts \ reviving Kond ...
  
• 8/9/2020 news: \ new major anti-corruption steps \ Yerevan deficit shrinks \ 1994 murder retrial \ Khojalu facts & Czech reporter \ ECHR vs Aliyev's Armenophobia \ ex-MP charged \ monuments++ \ mass testing for teachers \ trashy phone calls \ loans++ \ roads++ \ high-tech tutoring
  
• 7/9/2020 news: \ electric car imports skyrocket \ inciting genocide = life sentence \ tourist boulevard on Sevan shores \ defamation law \ EU deportations \ anti-corruption busts \ անճոռնի գորտը \ March 1st statue & victims \ COVID & economy \ telecom & 5G \ app: pick your doctor \ ...
  
• 6/9/2020 news: \ Gyumri Day: new transport, parks, tourism, arts \ demolishing ex-police chief's Sevan mansion \ Geo-politics. Russian-American spy's plans in Armenia \ diplomatic passports \ Nikol's horses \ are Armenians generous? \ the heroes \ sports & music \ bike tour across Armenia
  
• 4/9/2020 news: \ Karabakh prez rattles former regime, "exposes" land giveaway \ Anti-RU protests in AZ \ Armenia will have Amazon Locker-style delivery \ Real car safety checks & driver training \ Nuclear renovation \ Quarantine Law ready \ Lake Sevan \ Truck fee \ HayPost discount \ ...
  
• 3/9/2020 news: \ PM's office busts corruption. Gov't building repairs. Fake news \ govt to inject $104m to kickstart businesses \ police reforms, cars, academy \ Serj's trial \ anti-corruption stats \ Yerevan's irrigation \ geopolitics \ consumer prices \ HIV \ athlete salary \ ...
  
• 2/9/2020 news: \ Armenia resolves railway dispute w/Russia \ geopolitics: Syrian fighters, AZ, TR, RU \ USA & EU help with police reforms & laboratory \ LTE & lower fees in Artsakh \ ex-police chief's Sevan mansion \ corruption busts \ Kond \ YSU tuition & salaries \ renovations \ ...
  
• 1/9/2020 news: \ archaeologists discover canals, scripts, churches in Artsakh's Tigranocerta, dismiss "Caucasian Albania" theories \ Volunteer Army to have 100,000 men & women \ mass poisoning from wood alcohol \ winery explosion \ anti-corruption busts \ schools++ \ new Yerevan bus \ ...
  
• 31/8/2020 news: \ Archaeologists examine a strange 1919 mass-murder \ Corruption Committee to investigate Pashinyan \ ex-officials & IRS agents busted. Millions $ \ warden arrested \ COVID vs consumption \ sports & arts news \ Lebanese & Syrian Armenians \ u do business? \ trash sorting!
  
• 30/8/2020 news: \ Armenia's one of a kind radio-optical telescope could connect to international network for space exploration \ ex-Minister charged with $1.7m theft \ Court verdict on HHK mayor's bail \ PM's trip \ Germany, Turkey, Azerbaijan, EU \ Mountain squad \ Dilijan's new Rope Park
  
• 28/8/2020 news: \ New details about Tavush battles. Medals awarded \ Vaccines, tourism, working parents \ Doing business in AM. Survey & investments \ Police brutality busted \ Kocharyan calls Nikol "corrupt" \ Subsidies to boost rural teaching \ Lebanese repatriates \ Chess boycott \ ...
  
• 27/8/2020 News TLDR: \ New airport, village, reservoir to be built \ Doctor becomes Hero \ COVID tickets \ "Quarantine" to replace Emergency State \ Big bust over police bribery \ Prison guards arrested \ Worker rights \ Lebanese-Armenians \ Utility subsidies \ Roads++ \ Kurds in Turkey
  
• 26/8/2020 news: \ Apartment building collapses \ Trial of ex-IRS boss \ Artsakh + Russia = Love? \ COVID \ High-tech develops \ Post office modernizes & expands abroad \ Fight against criminal subculture \ Fake news rundown \ Armenian passport is meh \ Medicine imports \ TUMO in Moscow
  
• 25/8/2020 news: \ Armenia to have a new Volunteer Army for national defense \ Azerbaijan's internal clan wars intensify \ Anti-Corruption: Tsarukyan's wine company, Artsakh official, Schools \ COVID \ Electoral reform \ Lebanese-Armenian repatriates \ Fishing industry \ Lake Sevan \ more
  
• 24/8/2020 news: / Poll: COVID, income, future / SU-25 and SU-30CM jets / Soldier wanders off / Artsakh apartments++ / Kocharyan sues Armenia / CC judge Tovmasyan's trial / People like art / U.S. sends aid / Gasprom layoffs / Employment++ / School reform / Tourism & Nature++ / Warehouse collapses
  
• 22/8/2020 news: (1) Serj draws criticism over Tavush Battles medal comments, gets reminded about his questionable past awards. (2) "Pashinyan has served his purpose and needs to go." (3) Court mergers (4) church mural restored (5) chess Olympiad (6) nature = good (7) COVID vs jobs (8) Syrian aid
  
• 21/8/2020 news: // How the army was born in 90s // Tavush Battles. Liberation of Anvakh. Pashinyan speech. Russia responds. // COVID vs Economy // Antibody experiments // The return of HHK // Fishers and villagers protest // Should 16-year-olds vote? // Justice reforms // Lebanese-Armenian aid
  
• 20/8/2020 news: () new Metro station in Yerevan () individualism vs totalitarianism () gold miners lose license () new Kalashnikov AK-12? () stats: COVID vs remittances, tourism, real estate () Amulsar & other protests () village house subsidy () New food factory () light aircraft flying & tourism
  
• 19/8/2020 news: / Q&A with Serj. Claims April 2016 was victory. Downplays Tavush victory. Notable parts. Investigator responds with criticism / New suicide drone / LHK joins BHK / Make villages great again / Infrastructure++ / Weighing trucks / Operation "Save the Fish" / COVID / High-tech aid
  
• 18/8/2020 News: / ex-Yerevan Mayor & ex-Minister busted. Laundering. / Voter list de-bloating / IRS wants $2.8m from Gago's casino / Magic wand prints free money for kids / Anti-Corruption: Good cop, Bad cop / Amulsar & Mining / Bordering village aid / About COVID / Tourism! / Foreign Affairs / ++
  
• 17/8/2020 news: / Armenia's fish industry & water reserves / Eco-tourism in Sevan... need roads / Anti-corruption stats: 2020 vs 2019 vs ... / Yerevan begins recycling / Belorussian activists use "Armenian model" / Domestic violence 2020 vs 2019 / Rector's doctoral degree / Neolithic discoveries /
  
• 16/8/2020 news: / How Kocharyan & Serj sold Armenia's infrastructure: Nuclear, Zangezur Copper, Hydro, Water, Post Office, Railway / Tavush Battles heroes / Bomb comments: Ganja & Stepanakert / Jeffrey Epstein has died / Nature protection rules / Belarus: 2008 or 2018? / Armenia, Greece, Turkey /
  
• 14/8/2020 news: / STEM in 2nd grade / 71 soldiers get medals. Tavush Battles / Beirut aid & repatriates. / Pashinyan is grilled / Anti-Corruption Court discussions / Officials charged with corruption / Uranium / Sasna Tsrer threats / Azerbaijan / COVID news / Beautiful Armenia / Infrastructure++
  
• 13/8/2020 news: / Two more COVID aid packages / Polls! / Illegal Sevan buildings / Mafia gang arrested / Anti-corruption / Army death transparency / Foreign Affairs: food boycott & cancellations in LA, arrests in AZ, Russian weapons / Lebanon & Gaza / Fireworks ban / Recycling & trash factories
  
• 12/8/2020 news: / 2016 Yerevan hostage crisis trial. Sasna Tsrer / Beirut aid. Repatriates / COVID restrictions relaxed. Foreign travel. Free care. Parties / HayPost & fiber-optic for borders / UCOM subscribers held a vote / Earthquake / This is Sparta / Amulsar gold miner Lydian / Your boy IRS /
  
• 11/8/2020 news: / Inspectors find some ammonium in Armenia. Beirut aid / How Kocharyan & Serj sold Armenia's infrastructure to Russia / Kocharyan trial / ex-BHK official demands refund. Voter buying / $446M corruption / COVID news & Economy / The story of Dragon Stones / Soccer league renamed /...
  
• 10/8/2020 news: / Bolola: Anatolia vs Armenian Highlands / Archaeology: new Qarahunj & Dragon-stones found / Huge illegal fishing campaign busted / Sugar monopoly penalized / Yerevan's new elevators / COVID: phone metadata monitoring law / Banking in Armenia / Treaty of Sevres & Western Armenia
  
• 9/8/2020 news: / Secret license - Karabakh Telecom / World's most efficient thermal plant / Arrests / Ex-police chief in trouble. Threats / Neighborhood news / Beirut aid. Eye-witness report. Repatriates & Arabs / Earthquake-proof schools / Education reforms - Arts & Crafts / Armenian churches / +
  
• 7/8/2020 news: / Russia extradites ex-MP. Murder attempt / Amulsar trailers / Nature audit / Anti-Corruption: Panama Paper's friend, two mayors, officials / Beirut aid / COVID & neighbors / AZ buys GEO fiber-optics / Tavush battles / Women in tech / Fewer car crashes / Women in tech / McBridgeface
  
• 6/8/2020 news: / Drugs over mail = OK / Armenia will have its High-Tech & Science hub. Chinese $$ / Infrastructure++ / Beirut explosion. Armenia audits itself / Anti-corruption: ex-Yerevan mayor & hydro plant, Healthcare Minister, another mayor / Amulsar protest / Gender wage gap & stats / COVID /
  
• 5/8/2020 news: / Population grows / No grades in school / Beirut explosion. Armenian community / MP's Russian citizenship / "Pro-Pashinyan" media pushed out of LA / Foreign affairs / Amulsar protest. Arbitration lawsuit. Activists clash / COVID briefing. Re-opening plans / Food & Energy prices /
  
• 4/8/2020 news: / Kocharyan trial. Frozen assets. Civil lawsuit. / Another fugitive escapes justice with Russian citizenship / Amulsar gold mine protests. Lydian removes tents / Two ex-mayors charged with corruption / Lung ventilator production / Azeri hackers / Mashtots Garden & Trees / Metro!
  
• 3/8/2020 news: / New anti-corruption court / Two monopolies penalized / Corruption investigations +64% / Judicial transparency / Tavush Battles. Tanks. Sanctions. / Yezidi community / Infrastructure & Construction ++ / Nature protection / COVID aid packages / Diaspora! / Sarsang Reservoir / ...
  
• 2/8/2020 news: (1) post-Tavush. Azeri dissident. No communication. Serbian weapons. PACE vs Aliyev (2) Free cancer drugs (3) Employee rights (4) IRS's record-low debt (5) Now HHK "assaults" Constitutional Court (6) Poll: Would you leave Armenia? (7) Governor vs Mayor (8) COVID news (10) Roads++
  
• 31/7/2020 news: / Karabakh War, Grey Wolves, Elchibey / Aliyev gets no love / Russian oil monopoly / COVID / Anti-corruption: Vanetsyan, QP MP, Yerevan official / Judges hold a meeting / Marijuana trial / UCOM outage $$ / Poll: friendly and hostile countries / Infrastructure & industry / Fortress
  
• 30/7/2020 news summary: (1) Net Neutrality in Armenia (2) Tavush battles - Aliyev's crisis - international response - civilians (3) Anti-corruption: oligarch, soccer match fixing, officials (4) COVID (5) Ancient cities (6) New police salaries++ (7) Miners protest (8) Solar projects (9) Tourism++
  
• 29/7/2020 news summary: / post-Tavush battles / Flashback 1993 / Aliyev's crisis & dissidents / Armenia bans Turkey / Israeli drones / Anti-corruption & Gangs / COVID is retreating / Obesity stats / Poll: Amulsar mining / Poll: inheritance / Lake Sevan / Garbage news / Solar panels & Elevators /
  
• 28/7/2020 news: / Tavush Battles - Pashinyan's interview TLDR - Russia relations - Margarita Simonyan - Karabakh / Bordering residents to get subsidies / Firdusi tourism / Diaspora / 1st lady / Anti-corruption news: BHK, Kocharyan, judge / COVID vs economy & railways / Money / Infrastructure++
  
• 27/7/2020 news: / Post-Tavush battles / Aliyev vs ex-diplomat / Weapons / AM & AZ civilians / Governor's assassination plot / Kocharyan's friendly judge / Mayor sentenced / Anti-corruption busts / COVID vs economy / Deported? / Infrastructure & Solar & Nature ++ / Free healthcare / Cheese, baby
  
• 25/7/2020 news: / post-Tavush Battles / Moscow's civilian clashes end - Apology tour - Market to end discrimination / OSCE responds / Aliyev vs Peace / Housing for refugees / de-mining in Artsakh / Failed demolition / COVID & Travel expenditures / Sevan water / Trees & Roads / Armenian literature
  
• 24/7/2020 news summary: / Tavush Battles / Moscow attacks / Border reservoir cooperation / Diplomacy / More babies born in Artsakh / COVID is retreating - a map / Busted: city official and cop / Keg explosion / Free apartments / Constitution / Economy & exports / Ugly billboards gone / Fav. books
  
• 23/7/2020 news: / Tavush Battles / Google Maps showing the military outposts & roads - New vs Old borders / Armenia reviews military & diplomatic performance / Anti-drone training with Russia / U.S. House - Diplomacy - Foreign media / COVID vs Economy / Water! / Safer cars / Infrastructure++ / ...
  
• 22/7/2020 news: / Tavush Battles - action map - new & old borders - Aliyev's meltdown - Yashma fails - repressions / Sevan's blossoming explained / Diasporans return / Constitutional Court / Anti-corruption - Ministers & MPs / Cyber church / COVID vs Economy / Roads! / Less runaround / Post office
  
• 21/7/2020 news: / $150 million drones shot / Russian state media responds to Apricot War & Tavush Battles / Azerbaijan "backtracks" on nuclear threat / Caviar diplomacy / World responds / Taxes / Infrastructure+ / COVID & polls / Free speech / Sevan is blossoming / Anti-corruption busts / Reforms
  
• 20/7/2020 news: / Tavush Battles / Frontline footage / Armenia hails victory / Donations / Aliyev is looking for scapegoats / Foreign affairs & Media / Apricot War / Brain inflow / Anti-corruption bust / Taxes & Alcohol vs COVID / Judge arrested / New 17-story building / Zipline ready / + more
  
• 19/7/2020 news: / Tavush Battles / How Armenia developed its drone industry / Aliyev becomes a Karen / Apricot War is settled / Politicians from US, UK, and EU respond / International media covers nuclear threat / Voter bribery busted / Airlines suspended / Armenia celebrates Vardavar / + more
  
• 18/7/2020 news: / Tavush Battles / Pashinyan's speech & Aliyev's plans / How to have "nuclear fallout" without nukes 101 / Armenian drones in action / Apricot Boycott turns into Armenian festival of support / Villages are rebuilding / Donations / Armenian diasporans march / + other topics
  
• 17/7/2020 news: / Tavush Battles / Nuclear threats are backfiring / Interview with Azeri human rights activist / Armenian diaspora responds / Casualties # / Armenia captures a drone / A calm day. Daily life returns / "Apricot boycott" / Iconic meme guy returns / Hackers & fake news / +other topics
  
• 16/7/2020 news: / Tavush Battles / 100 Azeris launch attack, 20 casualties, bodies collected / Videos / Armenian civilians struck / Ilham Aliyev's meltdown / Azerbaijan threatens to bomb nuclear plant / Foreign response & diplomacy / Pro-Azerbaijan EU rapporteur resigns / Fake news / +other topics
  
• 15/7/2020 news: / Tavush Battles / Casualties / Aliyev mad at MFA / 13 drones shut / Soldiers receive award & aid / Ethnic Talysh vs Aliyev / Evidence showing Azeri army attacks on Armenian civilians / Foreign affairs & response / Protests in Baku & Yerevan / The shepherd / Hackers strike / + more
  
• 14/7/2020 news: (1) Tavush battles. Baku-Ceyhan pipeline. High ranking casualties. Civilians targeted. Expensive Azeri drone is shot. Armenian drones in action. Hackers carry-out infrastructure attacks. Foreign response & diplomacy (2) + other stories
  
• 13/7/2020 news: (1) Tavush Battles. Azerbaijan sustains heavy losses. Villagers talk about the newly captured outpost. Azeri hackers spread fake news about Armenian losses. Timeline of events & international response (2) Artsakh to increase doctors' salaries. Free healthcare (3) + other topics
  
• 12/7/2020 news: (1) Border skirmish: 3 dead, 4 wounded, tanks, mortars (2) Archaeological discovery (3) What took down Armenian ISPs? (4) COVID stats (5) Infrastructure ++ (6) Church leaders respond (7) De-mining aid (8) Outlet fabricates a story (9) Criminal subculture bust (10) Charity (11) ...
  
• 10/7/2020 news: (1) Armenian cult leader (2) Real estate $ (3) ISP merger approved (4) Anti-Corruption (5) COVID news (6) High tech (7) Foreign affairs (8) Green Yerevan (9) Poll: Preferred gender? (10) Nature strikes (11) Many infrastructure upgrades (12) Dalma Garden district (13) Sports & Books
  
• 9/7/2020 news: () Tsarukyan's casino loses license () Gold mine in trouble () Solar incoming () Anti-bribery () TEAM licensed () BHK & Traditions () Foreign affairs () Diplomatic passports () Artsakh () Rebel arrested () Emergency powers () Yandex helps Yerevan () Finances () Construction QA ()
  
• 8/7/2020 news: (1) ECHR rejects judges' plea (2) Making Yerevan safer (3) Court strikes down Tsarukyan verdict (4) Armenia's abandoned villages (5) Fake news & COVID (6) Foxy LHK (7) Bills & Reforms (8) Road repair w/warranty (9) Bloody river (10) Artsakh tightens rules (11) Foreign affairs (12)..
  
• 7/7/2020 news: (1) Yerevan lowers speed limit (2) COVID testing to 2x (3) Kalashnikov's night vision WiFi (4) BHK MP arrested (5) Kocharyan trial (6) Arm. Genocide & Kim K (7) Bears & Storks (8) Foreign investment (9) Free healthcare (10) Ex-officials' land fraud (11) Infrastructure+ (12) Bills!
  
• 6/7/2020 News: (1) Paplavok murder. Kocharyan bodyguard's retrial (2) ECHR (3) Cost of 1GB (4) COVID news (5) ISP merger (6) Stats for Marriage/Deaths/Crime/Food Price/Exams (7) Would u marry non-Armenian? (8) Bomb threat (9) Nature strikes (10) Azeri blogger (11) Dvin city (12) Infrastructure++
  
• 5/7/2020: Armenian News Summary - Weekend Edition. Soccer rules, Constitution, Coronavirus, Noah's ark, Best violinists, News wars, Lake Sevan documentary, Major infrastructure upgrades, and more...
  
• 3/7/2020 News: (1) Anti-corruption reform (2) Polls (3) Stray dogs (4) Constitutional Court (5) Corruption trial (6) COVID news, Loan vacations, Grandma's phone (7) Real estate (8) Beeline ISP (9) This lake belongs to me (10) Soccer league LOL (11) Mayors busted (12) Yerevan's $10mln garden (13)..
  
• 2/7/2020: (1) Law targets foreign TVs (2) RUS & ARM journalists clash over news (3) ARM to import Kazakh oil to break RUS monopoly (4) Big trucks vs asphalt (5) COVID news, Vaccines, Grandma found (6) Gyumri's aerial tramway (7) Russian railway cuts prices (8) Edu. reforms (9) Pensions (10) Wheat!
  
• 1/7/2020 News: (1) BHK's voter fraud. Confession (2) Body goes missing bcz of doctor's handwriting (3) Karabakh conflict polls (4) Official charged (5) COVID news (6) Cops vs karens (7) Made in Armenia (8) Alimony law (9) Daily life of a grandmaster (10) Syrian envoy (11) Diaspora (12) Road repair
  
• 30/6/2020 News: (1) I took a bribe (2) Public polls about COVID (3) Property Tax Q&A (4) Parliament, Court, Referendum (5) President's scare (6) Subsidized Hep C drug (7) Kocharyan trial (8) Armenian jets in Africa (9) Anti-body tests (10) Artsakh aid (11) Another Mayor (12) No torture in Kapan
  
• 29/6/2020: (1) Yerevan closes apartment garbage holes & Repairs roofs (2) Child care subsidy (3) Disability reforms (4) Crisis in Azerbaijan (5) Drive-in cinema (6) Economic Freedom+ (7) COVID (8) Relationship survey (9) Strasbourg mayor (10) NSS arrests IRS and police officials (11) Construction+
  
• 28/6/2020 News: (1) Radical changes to school grading (2) GMO food to be marked (3) Fewer army deaths (4) Tsarukyan's co-conspirator (5) Points-based traffic law (6) COVID news & tickets (7) Road repairs (8) Activist arrested (9) Gentrification (10) Constitutional Court (11) Fires (12) Orphan kids
  
• 26/6/2020 News: (1) Tsarukyan company's multi-million $ land fraud (2) Constitutional Court judges fired. Details. 3) BHK MP family's & Yerevan official's property fraud (4) COVID news (5) Armenian hackers (6) Medicine production in Armenia (7) Hamalir fire (8) Fixed soccer matches busted, 5 teams
  
• 25/6/2020 News: (1) CC Court crisis. Kocharyan pulls his case. LHK vs All. (2) Big property tax reform (3) Child care subsidies (4) Pashinyan got mad again (5) Roads & Infrastructure (6) Kocharyan's ally charged (7) Armenian mortar (8) Infected taxi driver (9) Cops organized crime (10) A kiss?
  
• 24/6/2020 News: (1) Constitutional Court crisis / President / Judge / LHK (2) Cancel culture hits Armenia (3) USA news (4) Criminal subculture (5) COVID news. Armenian kits. (6) Yerevan's taco trucks & parking (7) Remote education (8) Ice cream danger (9) NSS agents & mayors busted (10) More roads
  
• 23/6/2020 News: (1) Constitutional Court judges cling to power (2) Kocharyan & Tsarukyan (3) Universal income tax (4) Jobs are recovering (5) ... and so do COVID patients (6) Hospitals & Schools (7) Bro, it's an elementary thing (8) Herpes drug? (9) Azeris in Yerevan (10) Parks, Roads, & Startups.
  
• 22/6/2020 News: (1) Constitutional Court bill. Pashinyan scores major victory. Venice Commission. HHK mad (2) Bribed soldiers (3) Court re-installs HHK mayor (4) Kocharyan & Tsarukyan trials (5) Activist beaten (6) Mayor is busted (7) COVID news. Hospitals. Donations (8) Whirlwind (9) Borders
  
• 21/6/2020 News: (1) Mishik clashes with Pashinyan's family outlet (2) Flashback. Tsarukyan's past (3) Tsarukyan sued by German investor (4) Tsarukyan avoids jail for now (5) Kocharyan receives remittances from Russia (6) European Parliament (7) COVID. More resources. More aid. (8) Nature strikes
  
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