Time between having the urge and will to write: 6 months. Good to know, my self awareness is developing, live in....well, hopefully happiness and harmony.
Part 4
I’m breathing hard. Drained. Adrenalin spike well and truly over. Asthma isn’t quite going off just yet, so that’s nice. I’m covered in goop. My ankles are stinging from the pinpricks that pricked me with pins.
There’s a weird rush you get, same as my car accident, when time is both slow as molasses dripping from the aircon vent (Bad prank. Do not recommend.) and over as fast as….a fast….thing.
The horde of in some way sentient gunk deposits rushed at me, I just wanted to get away and desperately scrabbled at the cavern walls, my fingers digging in and anils scraping as dirt and rocks went flying through the air, I dislodged a rock the size of my head (“pendulous melon” they called it once) that bounced and rolled into the misbegotten ogly slime things, carving a lane into their mass.
The soil, a rich brown, falling in clumps around me gave way to more dirt, no escape. One leg jerks up as the sensation of a thumbtack jabs into it, the front rank of sluggos has made it to me, their weird needle things in their little claws jabbing into me. It sucked.
My back goes against the pitiful wall scrapes I’ve made as I started kicking out, my bare foot swing out, connecting and obliterating a slug. There’s a crunch noise, like it’s not all slime and mucus, the sensation of stepping on a giant snail while it’s upside down.
We’re stuck in that pattern for what feels like an hour, my pulse pounding at my temples, the mushy creatures rushing forward at me. A pair of the things plop down from above me somewhere, one lands on my shoulder. The other goes lands smack dab on my face.
If the desperate single step dance routine I was doing before was inelegant, that paled before the flailing of all of my limbs as a surprise mass of sludge went into my mouth and covered my eyes. Some distant kernel of my mind decided the closest experience I had to this was some distant, deep, dark memory of fire drills as I drop and roll, flailing about to tear this damn thing off my face, needle pricks happening at random as I feel my mass meet slug kumbaya group, I roll back and forth flinging the thing on my face into the distance. The pinpricks stopped.
That was it. I was bleeding, covered in ooze and slime, shaking from shock. I had work in the morning. I desperately crawled in the inch thick layer of sludge, trying to get to my feet. I could feel the blood drop out of my face as I leaned against the wall.
There’s a helpful breathing exercise for this sort of scenario. Sure would be good to know what it is. I clutch my face, desperately rubbing ick outof my eyes and nose, I can feel bile trying to work it’s way up. I can taste slime, it’s like rancid milk. It won’t go way.
Someone come along now please. I don’t want to be here. I don’t know how long I sat there. Long enough to be thirsty. Long enough that it seemed clear no one else was coming.
Sitting in a cavern of slug guts was motivation at least. The Lichen tore from the wall with ease, when the feeble light it generated promptly died out. I shudder for a moment as reality keeps asserting itself.
I’m not in Kansas. Nor am I at home. I don’t even have a small hound for company. I’m clearly underground. There are giant slugs that make battle formations, cheerleader triangles and are armed in a weird way. There’s at least one Casino Dice.
I’m wearing blood and slug stained tracksuits, which were of questionable cleanliness before this started. The lack of a shirt is becoming more uncomfortable, I haven’t got the physique of a runner. Or dancer. Basically anyone with a modicum of healthy exercise/dietary choices.
On the other hand, at least I’m alive? Most of the bleeding has stopped, none of the wounds were especially deep, just painful.
I need to get cleaned up, I don't want an infection. Food/watelocation are then the secondary concerns. If this doesn’t count for sick leave I’ll be furious.
Part 5
In our times of woe, when we are truly unsure and struggling, we need only remember that we can be the best versions of ourselves and act in that mindset.
Obviously this means it’s time to think about what Drazzt, the noble Drow hero who is the older mentor style brother to Drizzt, would do. I did make the character good at everything, even if our petulant game master called him “An abuse of character creation rules the like of which only illiteracy can produce”. Dude so rehearsed that line, he stumbled three times getting it out before the tiny cue card concealed in his palm slipped out. Bet the wuss got a paper cut too.
Drazzt would roll a barely legible D20 and claim a moderate number of about 14, unless a higher number was on the dice.
Fine, the petty escapism isn’t helping me. The Caverns dimness isn’t too dissimilar to the regular low lighting I utilised at home to hide the state of the floor, so at least my eyes didn’t have to adjust too wildly. Might have meant I saw less gross Slug guts and stuff. They have a tiny little bones somehow, some sort of skeleton structure to support their distorted limbs.
The air is cool, though not enough to shiver. Not too stale, though I can’t feel any airflow. Lots of openings of different sizes through the caverns, won’t fit through most. They would have been handy when I was desperately scrabbling to stop being mauled before.
I stare at the widest opening. It looks like it might be a squeeze, though given the soft dirt walls I can probably force my way in. Weird how this whole cave thingy is holding together, feels like it should fall apart as soon as water is involved or surface weight impacts it. I came across rocks, but no tree roots.
I don’t know where I am, who knows how far away the surface is. Time is hard to track down here, the lichen is always luminous so far, though I don’t think it’s been a day yet as I’m not hungry enough. How did I get here? Am I suffering from some kind of psychosis? It’s too real to be a nightmare and I never had the patience to succeed with that lucid dreaming stuff.
People don’t just teleport. They just…..don’t…...plus that webcomic I read one time made me realise we were just seeing all those Red Shirts die multiple times, as did Kirk.
Something small and hard bounces off my temple. My head spun and swivelled in a way vaguely reminiscent of the exorcist. If this is some elaborate ruse, some form of prank show, I’ll sue them into oblivion. An Ashton Kutcher produced version of the Truman Show feels like an awful idea.
My gaze follows the blue casino dice as it rolls to a slow halt away from me. It shows a 3. A slug covered in orange ick is waving it’s arms and gesticulating madly, it’s undulating flesh jiggling in a way I find slightly uncomfortable, like a Snail Zumba’d it’s way out of it’s shell.
This must be the last of the Pyramidals? Lapy. Now called Lapy.
I awkwardly stare at this small fidgeting monstrosity. It moves back and forth a bit, a small squeaking noise coming from its misshapen gash of a maw. Thought slugs didn’t have teeth? Then again it has arms and stuff.
Great. I’ve got a friend.
submitted by Hasn't been updated in 12 years, but it's a fairly comprehensive list.
Want to help update it?
0-9
8 Mile (2002). Marijuana.
9 to 5 (1980). Marijuana.
24 Hour Party People (2002). Ecstasy.
25th hour (2002). Heroin
A
The Acid House (1998). LSD.
Adaptation. (2002). Fictional version of Ghost Orchid powder.
Alice (1988). Fly agaric.
Almost Famous (2000). LSD and quaaludes.
Alpha Dog (2007). Marijuana.
Altered States (1980). LSD.
American Beauty (1999). Marijuana.
American Gangster (2007). Heroin and Cocaine.
American Psycho (2000). Cocaine and marijuana.
American Satan (2017). Heroin
Amores Perros (2001). Cocaine.
The Anniversary Party (2001). Ecstasy.
Apocalypse Now (1979). LSD, opium, marijuana and cocaine.
Avenging Disco Godfather (1979). PCP.
B
Bad Boys II (2003). Ecstasy and Heroin.
Bad Lieutenant (1992). Crack cocaine and heroin.
The Basketball Diaries (1995). Heroin, cocaine, marijuana and solvents.
Batman Begins (2005). Hallucinogens.
The Beach (2000). Marijuana, psychedelic mushrooms and stimulants.
Beavis and Butt-head Do America (1996). Peyote.
Beerfest (2006). Marijuana.
Belly (1998). Cocaine and marijuana.
The Big Lebowski (1998). Marijuana.
Blow (2001). Cocaine and marijuana.
Blueberry (2004). Mescaline or DMT.
Blue Velvet (1986). An unnamed inhalant, possibly nitrous oxide or amyl nitrite.
Boiler Room (2000). Cocaine.
Bongwater (1997). Marijuana,LSD, and cocaine.
Boogie Nights (1997). Cocaine and methamphetamine.
The Boost (1988). Cocaine.
The Breakfast Club (1985). Marijuana.
Brick (2006). Heroin.
Bug (2007). Marijuana and cocaine.
Buffalo Soldiers (2001). Heroin
Bully (2001). Marijuana, LSD, methamphetamine.
C
Candy (2006). Heroin and marijuana.
Casino (1995). Cocaine, heroin and painkillers.
Caveman (1981). Fictional marijuana berries.
Cheech & Chong's various movies feature drugs such as marijuana, cocaine, LSD and various pills. They include:
Up in Smoke (1978).
Nice Dreams (1981).
Still Smokin' (1983).
Chinese Opium Den (1894). Opium.
Christiane F. – Wir Kinder vom Bahnhof Zoo (1981). Heroin.
Clean and Sober (1988). Cocaine.
Climax (2018). LSD.
A Clockwork Orange (1971). Fictional drugs drencrom (presumably based on adrenochrome) and synthemesc (presumably synthetic mescaline).
Cocaine Cowboys (2006). Cocaine.
Cookers (2001). Methamphetamine.
Crank (2006). Fictional drug Beijing Cocktail, cocaine, epinephrine, "Hardcore Haitian Plant Shit", methamphetamine and marijuana.
Crooklyn (1994). Glue.
Cruel Intentions (1999). Cocaine.
D
Dazed and Confused (1993). Marijuana and LSD.
Dead Man's Shoes (2004). LSD, speed and ecstasy
Deep Cover (1992). Crack cocaine.
Detroit Rock City (1999). Marijuana and psychedelic mushrooms.
Dick (1999). Marijuana and quaaludes.
District 13 (2004). Cocaine.
Don't Be a Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the Hood (1996). Marijuana.
The Doors (1991). LSD, cocaine, ecstasy, heroin, salvia, marijuana and peyote.
Dope (2015). Ecstasy
Dream Seller (2007). Heroin.
Drugstore Cowboy (1989). Painkillers such as Dilaudid and Numorphan (the blues), amphetamines and cocaine.
E
Easy Rider (1969). Marijuana, cocaine and LSD.
Ed Wood (1994). Morphine.
Empire Records (1995). Marijuana and methamphetamine.
Enter the Void (2009). DMT, weed, something else?
Euro Trip (2004). Marijuana/hashish and absinth.
Everybody Wants Some!! (2016). Marijuana
Evil Bong (2006). Marijuana.
F
Fame chimica (2003). Marijuana and cocaine.
Fast Times at Ridgemont High (1982). Marijuana.
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1998). Mescaline, opium, marijuana/hashish, cocaine, ether, adrenochrome (fictionalized, as it's not truly a recreational drug), LSD, solvents, amyl nitrate, barbiturates and amphetamines.
Flirting with Disaster (1996). LSD.
Formula 51 (2001). Fictional drug Formula 51 and marijuana.
Freak Talks About Sex (1999). Marijuana.
The French Connection (1971). Heroin and cocaine.
Friday (1995). Marijuana and PCP.
Friday After Next (2002). Marijuana.
From Hell (2001). Opium, heroin and absinthe.
G
Garden State (2004). Various prescription drugs (esp. antidepressants), marijuana, nitrous oxide and MDMA.
Georgia (1995). Heroin.
Get Rich or Die Tryin' (2005). Crack cocaine and Marijuana
Gia (1998). Heroin and cocaine.
The Girl Next Door (2004). Ecstasy.
Go (1999). MDMA, marijuana and cocaine.
The Godfather (1972). Cocaine and heroin.
The Godfather: Part II (1974). Cocaine and heroin.
The Godfather: Part III (1990). Cocaine and heroin.
Goodfellas (1990). Cocaine and pills.
Grandma's Boy (2006). Marijuana.
Grass (1999). Marijuana.
Gridlock'd (1997). Heroin.
Grindhouse (2007). Marijuana.
Groove (2000). Ecstasy and marijuana.
Gummo (1997). Glue.
H
H (1990). Heroin.
Hair (1978). Marijuana and LSD.
Half Baked (1998). Marijuana, cocaine and heroin.
Half Nelson (2006). Cocaine and crack cocaine.
Hard Nights (1989). Heroin.
Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle (2004). Marijuana, cocaine and ecstasy.
Harvard Man (2001). LSD.
Head (1968). Marijuana and LSD.
Homegrown (1998). Marijuana.
How High (2001). Marijuana.
Human Traffic (1999). Marijuana, cocaine and ecstasy.
Hurlyburly (1998). Marijuana, cocaine and valium.
Hustle and Flow (2005). Marijuana.
I
Idle Hands (1999). Marijuana.
Igby Goes Down (2002). Heroin and marijuana.
I Got Five on It (2005). Marijuana.
I Got Five on It Too (2009). Marijuana.
I Got The Hook Up (1998). Marjuana, cocaine and LSD.
I'm Dancing As Fast As I Can (1982). Valium.
In the Name of the Father (1993). Marijuana and LSD.
It's All Gone Pete Tong (2004). Cocaine, toad licking, presumably a reference to the Bufo Alvarius or Colorado river toad from which the extract should not actually be licked as in the movie, but smoked, due to bufo toxin which is incinerated up smoking. Contains 5-meo-dmt.
It's A Party (2018). LSD and ecstasy.
J
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001). Marijuana.
Jesus' Son (1999). Heroin and tranquilizers.
K
Kids (1995). Marijuana, nitrous oxide, ecstasy and ketamine.
King of New York (1990). Cocaine.
Kiss of the Dragon (2001). Heroin.
Knocked Up (2007). Marijuana and psychedelic mushrooms.
L
The Last Minute (2001). Heroin.
Layer Cake (2004). Cocaine and ecstasy.
The Life of Rayful Edmond (2005). Cocaine, crack cocaine, and marijuana.
Liquid Sky (1982). Heroin.
Little Fish (2005). Heroin.
Little Miss Sunshine (2006). Heroin.
Less Than Zero (1987). Cocaine.
Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (1998). Marijuana and cocaine.
London (2005). Cocaine and marijuana.
Lord of the Rings (2003) Marijuana "Hobbit Weed"
Lord of War (2005). Cocaine.
Love (2015). Cocaine.
Love Liza (2002). Gasoline fumes.
M
Mallrats (1995). Marijuana.
Mandy (2018). LSD.
The Man with the Golden Arm (1955). Heroin.
Maria Full of Grace (2004). Cocaine.
MDMA (2017). MDMA
Menace II Society (1993). Crack cocaine, heroin and marijuana.
Midnight Express (1978). Hashish.
Midsommar (2019). Mushrooms and other hallucinogens
A Midsummer's Night Rave (2002). Ecstasy.
More (1969). Heroin.
Most High (2006). Cocaine and crystal meth.
My Own Private Idaho (1991). Cocaine.
N
Naked Lunch (1991). Heroin.
National Lampoon's Animal House (1978). Marijuana.
Natural Born Killers (1994). Marijuana and psychedelic mushrooms.
New Jack City (1991). Crack cocaine.
Next Friday (2000). Marijuana.
The Night Before (2015). Mushrooms, cocaine, marijuana, and maybe MDMA
Nowhere (1997). Marijuana and ecstasy.
O
Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood (2019). LSD.
One Perfect Day (2004). Marijuana, painkillers, amphetamines and ecstasy.
P
Paid in Full (2002). Cocaine, crack cocaine and marijuana.
The Panic in Needle Park (1971). Heroin.
Party Monster (2003). Cocaine, heroin, ecstasy and ketamine.
Point Break (1991). Meth
PCU (1994). Marijuana.
A Perfect Day (2005). Marijuana, painkillers, amphetamines and ecstasy.
Performance (1970). LSD.
Permanent Midnight (1998). Heroin and cocaine.
The Place Beyond the Pines (2012). Oxycontin, marijuana, ecstacy
Platoon (1986) Marijuana.
Project X (2012). Alcohol, marijuana, ecstasy.
Psych-Out (1968). LSD and STP (DOM).
Puff, Puff, Pass (2006). Marijuana.
Pulp Fiction (1994). Cocaine, heroin and marijuana.
Q
R
Ray (2004). Heroin and marijuana.
Reefer Madness (1936). Marijuana.
Reefer Madness (2005 remake). Marijuana.
Remember the Daze (2007). Marijuana, mushrooms
Repo Man (1984). Marijuana, cocaine and amphetamines.
Requiem for a Dream (2000). Heroin, amphetamines, cocaine, DXM and marijuana.
Return to Paradise (1998). Hashish.
Rockers (1978). Marijuana.
Rolling Kansas (2003). Marijuana.
Romeo + Juliet (1996). Ecstasy.
The Rules of Attraction (2002). Mushrooms, cocaine, LSD, methamphetamine, marijuana and MDMA.
The Runaways (2010). Cocaine, pills, marijuana.
Rush (1991). Heroin.
S
The Salton Sea (2002). Methamphetamine.
Sample People (1999). Fictional drug "glow" and cocaine.
Saving Grace (2000). Marijuana.
A Scanner Darkly (2006). Cocaine, marijuana and Substance D, a fictional psychoactive stimulant.
Scarface (1983). Cocaine and heroin.
Sherry Baby (2004). Heroin.
"She Shoulda Said 'No'!" (1949). Marijuana.
Sid and Nancy (1986). Heroin and marijuana.
The Simpsons Movie (2007). Presumably peyote and/or mescaline.
Slackers (2002). Marijuana.
SLC Punk! (1999). LSD, percodan, and marijuana.
Slim Susie (2003). Amphetamine, heroin and marijuana.
Smiley Face (2007). Marijuana.
South West Nine (2004). LSD, ecstasy and marijuana.
Spun (2002). Methamphetamine.
Steal This Movie (2000). Marijuana.
The Stoned Age (1994). Marijuana.
Superbad (2007). Cocaine.
Super Troopers (2001). Marijuana, psychedelic mushrooms and LSD.
T
Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny (2006). Marijuana and psychedelic mushrooms.
Thelma & Louise (1991). Marijuana
Thirteen (2003). Inhalants (i.e. "Airduster"), marijuana, various prescription drugs and LSD.
Traffic (2000). Cocaine and heroin.
Training Day (2001). Marijuana, crack cocaine, and PCP.
Trainspotting (1996). Heroin, marijuana, valium, ecstasy and amphetamines.
The Trip (1967). LSD.
The Tripper (2007). Marijuana.
True Romance (1993). Cocaine and marijuana.
Tweek City (1995). Crystal meth.
Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me (1992). Cocaine.
U
The United States of Leland (2003). Heroin.
V
Enter the Void (2009)
W
Waiting... (2005). Marijuana.
Walk the Line (2005). Cocaine and amphetamine.
War Dogs (2016). Marijuana, cocaine.
The Wash (2001). Marijuana.
Wasted (2002). Heroin.
Where the Buffalo Roam (1980). Marijuana.
Withnail and I (1987). Marijuana, speed and other pills.
Woodstock (1970). Marijuana.
The Wolf of Wall Street (2013). Weed, Quaaludes, Cocaine, Crack.
submitted by Link to part 1 You're a Dirty-Grey Earth Fluffy with an even dirtier Black mane and tail, walking as fast as you can to the north, part of a massive Herd that stretches as far back as you can see and beyond.
Back when you were part of your Original Herd, you were called Dirt, because no matter what you did or how many times you jumped in the Water Holes, your Fluff seemed to attract dirt all on it's own. Now you're just 'Fwuffie', like everyone else.
Across the highway is another, equally massive Herd, full of Meanie Fluffies who say that Uni loves them more.
You'd go over and give them owies, but the Desert Fluffies know that Biggest Meanest Monsters come roaring down the highway frequently, so it's best to conserve your strength for the day when the Meanie Herd is being incredibly Mean.
As a Desert Fluffy, you know the surrounding regions quite well, but you've never had an adventure like this before
Follow the Black Hard Thing that Hoomins call the 'Highway', always follow it, never leave to follow down the smaller Black Hard Things, because they do not go 'North'. Find the Water Holes and have to stop Fluffies from pushing each other in.
Have to force them to wait for their turn, and then have to make those who have had their fill of water keep moving. And with so many Fluffies, thousands of them, it's hard to make them stop fighting.
The last water-hole, there was barely any water for the last few Fluffies, just very dirty water that they cried over, but drank anyways, because they were so hot and thirsty.
These Cee-Tee Fluffies are real pains in your Poopie Place. They never work together like your Herd used to.
And there's barely enough food for everyone now. Have to beat the Fluffies who try to eat everything, they are supposed to only have a mouthful of something and move on, so those behind them can eat too.
You have had to beat a lot of Fluffies to get them to understand that if they eat all the nummies, then their friends behind them will have none.
Then you had to keep driving them on when they tried to turn back and 'Gif Sowwy Huggies!' to their 'Fwiends'.
Have to stay on your side of the road too, as there's a Mean Herd just as big on the other side, eating all the shrubs and grass and shouting that they love Uni more than you do.
Want to fight the Mean Herd to prove you love Uni the most, but can't, Fluffies need to keep moving and go 'North' as fast as they can, and if you waste time fighting, then Uni might pick somebody else as her One True Special Friend.
Fluffies whimper, some cry about being hot, about their hooves hurting, about wanting nummies, but nobody stops. Uni is waiting, at a magical place...
Fluffies walk till it's too hot, then try to find shade to wait out the hottest part of the day.
Some of the Herd's Cee-Tee Stallions say they have been walking for many turnings of the Sun, from a place full of Hoomins and Fluffies and Grass and Water, and it makes your head spin that they would abandon such a paradise.
There's nothing out here but the blistering hot sun, the cruel, burning sand and small shrubs and patches of hard, bitter grass.
And Snake-Munsta and Bug-Munstas and... well, there's a lot of Munstas.
Until She came along, you despaired of ever finding a way out of this hellhole.
Uni... just remembering her makes your heart swell with longing, and you find the strength to push onwards just a little bit more.
"Too wamm!" A Stallion near the front of the Herd shouts. He's right, the Sun is climbing so high it's nearly overhead
Fluffies walk down into the bad-lands, and here is where you and you can help these 'Cee-Tee' Fluffies find shelter.
It's hard, there's more Fluffies than you can count, stretching back farther than you can see, but you try. Fluffy Mammas and Foals get the best shade, because they are the most vulnerable, then Mares, then Stallions.
Everyone is so hot, fluff is bad when Fluffies get this hot, so everyone pants through their mouths to try and make the 'Wamm Bad Feww' to leave their bodies.
Fluffies are warned about the Bug-Munstas and the Snake-Munstas, but some don't understand, or are too mean, and push into the rocks, looking for shelter.
Hear them scream as the Munstas sting them. Fluffies flop about, howling and pooping and shrieking as the Bad Bites make them spit boo-boo juices and turn ugly colors.
Fluffies cram in under shrubs, behind tall rocks, anywhere there is shade, and pant, flicking their tails and twitching their ears to try and make the Fly-Not-Friends who plague them go away.
On the other side of the road, the Other Fluffies are shouting in dismay, apparently several of their Herd tried to take shelter behind a Prickly Green Plant, and got bad owies from the thin needles that cover it.
Good. Don't like that Herd that is leading that mob of Cee-Tee Fluffies.
Made it impossible for you to be with Uni. Were naughty, so Uni's Hoomins pulled you all away.
You sigh and close your eyes, remembering how soft her fluff felt against your body, as the sun climbs higher into the sky, and the shade the Fluffies hide under shrinks
"Yuu weft dem awone! Wun away to chase Uni! Why yuu weave yuu Hewd to chase Uni! Bad Fwuffies! Hewds wuv yuu, an' yuu wun away!"
Whimper and try to forget the memory of Uni being so very angry with you. It's not your fault! She just... you think of Uni, and then your Mares, but there's just no comparison at all. Your Mares were small and scrawny and dirty, their ears ragged, their fluff full of dust and burrs.
Touching Uni was like... you don't know the words to describe it. It was like every good thing you ever wanted, and so many good things you never knew existed, all at once.
Soft, clean, warm, pretty, good feels, nice smells
You sigh and try to block out the sounds of Fluffy Ponies complaining loudly, pushing and shoving each other as the shade shrinks and shrinks, forcing the hot, unhappy Fluffies ever closer together.
But Uni is going 'North'.
And you will follow her to the ends of the Land, you said so.
You promised.
*********************************************************************
Well. Las Vegas...certainly more than you ever expected.
Spent a week and a half here, doing 'adverts' for various businesses that think appealing to Fluffy Pony Owners is a sound business decision.
Uni's getting the work out of her life here.
Fluffies are brought out to meet her by their owners, get hugs, and 'help' with the adverts.
Done everything from garages trying to sell fuel and repairs to specialty stores selling 'all natural' Fluffy Chow and even a Fluffy Pimp.
Seriously?
Don't think that one is going to see air-time.
The three mares were quite beautiful and were wearing makeup, with ribbons tied through their manes.
"How much yuu chawge?" They asked you, scowling at 'Uni'.
That was surprising. Uni was designed to be adorable by Fluffy Pony standards, until you twigged that they saw Uni as a 'rival' for business.
Only reason they weren't attacking was your size, otherwise you're sure that 'Uni' would have been showered with 'Sowwy Poopies!'
Regardless, you're a professional, do the shoot, then BUG THE HELL OUTTA THERE.
Prosti-Fluffies shouting at Pip and Eddy they can 'haf one on da howse!'
Nononononono....
Second-to-last Advert Shoot is in a Casino.
Seriously? SERIOUSLY?
Well at least there'll be AC. Feel like a steamed dumpling at this stage.
Whoever came up with the concept of a Latex Suit never worked in a desert, you're sure.
'Uni' is given some chips, 'plays' some of the games and 'wins' bowls of Spaghetti.
Big, heaped bowls of Spaghetti.
Oh God.
*********************************************************************
Set six weeks later
Be Natasha Goodaluv, again, and watch with bemusement as Eddy and Pip go out to meet the Fluffy Ponies and the Cows.
Some wit decided to stuff a Feral herd with Bovine Hormones, and started to bottle Fluffy Pony Milk. Without the addition of specific foods, the milk has a tendency to have a very starchy taste, but with all the sweet, well-watered grass and high-sucrose fodder the Farmer feeds them, the milk is almost sickeningly sugary.
Had a glass, can barely stand still. No wonder the little fluff-balls are so hyperactive if this is what they grow up on.
Sammy has bought twelve bottles of the damn stuff. Swears it'll be better for everyone than the redbull they're going through. Might be healthier, but for fuck's sake, you feel like you're vibrating right now from the sugar-high.
Oh God, the Mares in the fields have finally noticed Eddy and Pip are 'Stallions'.
This ought to be good. Eddy is 'interviewing' the Mares, while Pip is having a natter with the Farmer who originally came up with the concept of Bottled Fluffy Milk, a scattering of Fillies and young Mares following in his wake and giggling loudly.
In the fields outside the "Dairy Farmers of America" buildings, taking a well-earned break from the Uni-Suit as the madness starts.
"Yuu big Fwuffy! Yuu haf Hewd?" The 'Smarty Friend' of this all-female Herd asks loudly, grinning at Eddy.
Well, leering, but still...
"Eddy haf Hewd wit' Wittle Brudda Pip and Wittle Sistah Uni." Eddy rumbles at the Mares, who all squeak and squeal in delight.
Seriously, did they have to build the suit so Eddy sounded like that? You understand the marketing pitch, to make Eddy sound as big and authoritative as possible to make him popular with Earth Fluffy Ponies, but this is just ridiculous.
"Wan join mah Hewd?" The Smarty Mare shouts eagerly, tail lifted into the air and waving back and forth.
If you were closer, you'd bet you could smell the hormones flooding off her right now.
Combination of a lack of males, rich food, constant hormone injections to make her produce milk all the time, and that has to be one ripe little Fluffy out there trying to be sexy as all hell.
"For the record, if you two fuckers pop the suit's boner out there, I WILL beat you to death with your own fucking limbs." You hear the Director mutter into his head-set, and stifle the urge to giggle.
"An yuu is nice Hoomin who gif miwk to Fwuffies at home?" Pip squeaks to the Farmer, who grins and nods, obviously only just resisting the urge to burst out laughing.
Yes, the whole situation is absurd, just deal with it.
"Aaaaah, yep, I started bottling Fluffy Ponies milk a few years ago when they wandered onto my property, thought there might be a market." The aging, balding man snorts and grins as he watches 'Eddy' desperately trying to outrun the Mares, who had all latched on to his belly fluff, squirming and wriggling.
"WOOOOOOO!" You hear one Mare squeal in delight. Shit. SWAG has been launched...
Director is making choking noises, and you swear you can hear the coffee mug in his hands cracking as his knuckles turn white.
"Oh my God... well, uh, focusing on the milk again..." The Farmer makes an half-muffled snort of laughter as Pip and he walk away from the train-wreck of Eddy and the Mares. "The milk is bottled and treated on my farm, filled with all the good things Fluffy Ponies need, and then sold all over the country. There's Fluffy Milk for Foals, Fluffy Milk for Adults, Fluffy Milk for the Elderly Fluffies. Hell, I even pasteurize some for people too."
"Yaaaaay! Nice Hoomin get Fwuffie Miwk fo' evewy Fwuffie an' dere Mummies an' Daddies!" Pip 'cheers', dancing from hoof to hoof, his wings flapping 'eagerly'.
The Mares who followed pip also start dancing, delighted.
"Yuu is Guud Fwuffies who make Miwk fo' otha Fwuffies!" Pip tells them, 'smiling' at them. "Yuu is wunnerful! Yuu is Best Fwuffies!"
Mare cling to Pip's fluff and shout they love him, that they think he's 'wunnerful' too.
Eddy has fallen over with much cursing, sending Fluffy Ponies flying.
They rushed over to ask if he was okay, then saw the SWAG just lying there. Fluffy Mares all crowd around, rubbing their back-ends on the exposed shaft, giggling and cooing, even as their Smarty Friend tries to back into the damn thing.
"Nnnnnngh! So Big! Fwuffy gun' haf Best Speshaw Huggies!" She shouts loudly, grinding back as hard as she can, her face contorting hilariously as she tries to push all 2 feet of flanged latex horse wang into her tiny body.
That does it. Everyone bursts into laughter or starts wolf-whistling.
"Oh for the love of... FROM THE TOP!" The Director yells, rubbing at his temples.
Time till Spaghetti Land in Cleveland, Ohi opens ... 6 weeks
*********************************************************************
4 Weeks till Spaghetti Land in Cleveland, Ohio opens.
Kansas City. By All The Gods, so many adverts.
Uni's getting more mileage than you thought possible. Much as you hate to admit it, the suit is incredible to hold up under this constant 'abuse' without the mechanisms failing.
Doing a shoot at the St. Louis Arch, with the other two Suits.
Redo of the 'Journey' song. Seems that Fluffies absolutely adore it.
Apparently Las Vegas has had a surge of customers, with Fluffies in tow, and made a killing.
Customers can either take their winnings or have free all-you-can-eat buffets for themselves and their Fluffy Ponies for a week.
Naturally, people try to take the money, but the Fluffy ponies break down into tears, and the owners either boot the Fluffy, try to make it understand or give in to the guilt.
The other thing that's surprising is there's close to a million Fluffy ponies following in your wake.
Jesus enfing Christ. There's so many of them following the Freeway from Hollywood to Cleveland that satellites can pick them up.
They're only just reaching Las Vegas now, according to the News Reports, a sprawling two-part Herd that shambles on morning and night, leaving a trail of weak or dead Fluffy Ponies in their wake.
"We fowwowin' Uni!" One Fluffy Pony said on National Television, making the entire cast spit their coffee out in horror. "We fowwow Uni fow'evah! We wuv Uni!... I wuv Uni mowst dou...."
Cue the Feral Fluffies going into a screaming free-for-all as the Stallions jumped on the Smarty Friend, shouting that they themselves 'wuved' Uni more than anyone!
Any complaints to the show get funneled down the line to the your Mystery Asshole Boss. Hope the bastard's ears are melting off from the enraged Fluffy Pony Owners whose babies have run away to follow their Idol.
And there's scores of abusers out there attacking the herds, but apparently there were so many that a couple of flat-bed trucks actually went out of control when their wheels locked up with Fluff, and tipped over, crushing their inhabitants, who got 'Owie-Fixin'-Hugs' to make it all better.
And promptly suffocated under thousands of Fluffies trying to fix their 'boo-boos'.
Karma at work, ladies and gentlemen. You thought to yourself as you watched the police pry the Fluffy ponies off the corpses.
Las Vegas City Council apparently decided that it was a fantastic attention-getter, and has 'helped' the Fluffy Ponies by diverting them down the main 'strip' of road leading through town and blocking off the alleyways and side-streets.
Show-Girls are holding signs saying "Uni went that way!" instead of working the tables, or under them.
Lying bastards. They're just eager to see the Ferals leave, and possibly make their own Feral Fluffy Pony population disappear in the process.
Fuck you can only imagine what the Ferals have had to go through .....
*********************************************************************
You hold up your son to the sky... and weep bitter, bitter tears. The tears wash down into your dirty fluff, leaving two clean trails on your cheeks as the foal remains cold and stiff, despite your attempts to warm it with the morning sun.
The mare you had befriended on the way died, leaving you to look after the last of the babies you had given her one night when you couldn't stand the Hot-Naughty-Feels pulsing through you.
Brandy died because the Mean Herd snuck across the road and ate all the nummies, marching all night long while your herd slept.
Your herd kept following their side of the road, too afraid of the Munstas to cross the highway, too determined to stop and seek food further from the highway's edge.
Three days without food, and barely any water, and eventually she was too weak to move.
Babies had been without milk for two days when the first, your daughter Gust, fell off her Mother's back and wouldn't get up.
You and Brandy cried over her body so much, then left the Herd to take her and put her under a bush, where she could rest.
You both knew she was dead, but it made it easier to go on if you pretended she was just sleeping.
Then your son Brambles began to fall ill, and you tried everything you could think of to make him better.
Hugs, half-chewed grass, some sweet berries you found and brought back for him to suck on, nothing worked.
Bandy kept on telling you she was sorry, she was a "Bad Fwuffy Mumma". Told her she was the "Best Fwuffy Mumma evah, it not her fault if Meanie Hewd steaw nummies."
Brandy didn't move the next day, still and cold even with you hugging her through the night, your son snuggled between you both, wheezing in his sleep.
Now, he's dead. He's dead. HE'S DEAD. You feel so hollow and empty inside as you bring his body down, staring at it and fighting the urge to break down and will yourself to join your family in death.
You made a promise, not just to Uni, but to your mare and your babies that they would see Uni once again.
Your heart breaks, being a Fluffy Daddy was so... so fulfilling! It made every day wonderful to be alive, to know your babies were waiting for you to play with them, teach them to be good Fluffies.
You told them about Uni, the biggest, most beautiful (after their mumma) and most magical unicorn Fluffy who was leading Fluffies to a magical place.
Fluffies who joined you from the Cee-Tees said it was 'Sketti Wand', a place of endless Spaghetti, where Fluffies could play all day with nice hoomins who loved them, ride on toys made just for Fluffies, even find homes for themselves with the nice hoomins.
How the babies' eyes lit up when they heard that, how your mare sighed happily, all their hunger and pain forgotten for a few blissful moments.
Now... you have but one child left. A small, pale brown fillie with a shockingly bright-red mane and tail. Brandy the Second.
She's the only one that has managed to hold on to life, the only one that didn't fall sick from the lack of nummies, even though you can feel her ribs clearly when you give her huggies.
She's sitting there, dry-eyed and staring at her brother, her face inscrutable.
"Baybeh... we aww dat weft of famiwy." You whisper to her, placing your boy reverently down under a bush, tears still falling from your eyes.
"Fwuffie know. Fwuffie miss Mumma, miss Sissy, Miss Brudda." She whispers back, closing her eyes and sighing, sounding so much older than her single week of life could possibly suggest. "Buh we goin', Daddy? We goin' to see Uni, yes?"
Sigh and sob and laugh all at the same time, and let her climb up onto your back.
"Yes, Baybeh, we gon' see Uni. Daddy pwomise, an' Mumma wan' hew baybehs see Uni too, pway with Uni and eats wots of Sketti." You whisper to her as you shuffle off to rejoin the Herd, leaving your son to 'Sleep' alongside his mother under a prickly bush that will keep the Munstas from hurting them further.
As evening falls, you are all but falling over from weariness, but your daughter has had some nummies, where a nice hoomin had pulled up in a Fast Box Munsta and was distributing water and sweet nummies to the Fluffies.
"You keep going, you brave little things." She said, her face all wrinkled, smiling down at you as she handed out buttered peanut-butter-jelly sandwiches, which the herd dutifully broke down into bite-sized pieces, ate their share, and shuffled on after hugging the nice hoomin's ankles.
There's a lot of nice hoomins coming out now, saying they love Fluffy Ponies, want to see them make it to Sketti Wand.
Without them, you'd be dead by now, you're sure.
Some have Fluffies living with them in their Moving Safe Places, who cheer at you as well, saying they are going on ahead, and will be waiting for you at 'Sketti Wand'.
It's later that evening when you find the first of the Mean Herd, broken and bleeding, screaming about "Bad hoomins who gif huwties!"
They are quickly given Biggest Owies, and their bodies are rolled away from the road so that the Foals don't see them. They are evil fluffies who stole your nummies, and want to be special friends with Uni.
You once wanted to be like that. To make Uni your Special Friend, and yours alone.
Brandy changed that. Brandy filled your heart in ways that Uni never did.
You still love Uni, but Brandy will always live in your heart. You want to find Uni still, but so that she can teach your daughter to be a Good Fluffy too.
TO BE CONCLUDED.....
submitted by The operator, Kansas Entertainment, is a partnership of Kansas Speedway, Inc. and the Cordish Company. Kansas Speedway is a wholly-owned subsdiary of International Speedway Corp. in Daytona Beach, Florida. Branded the "Hard Rock Casino," the total cost of construction is estimated at $705 million. It will consist of a casino, hotel, convention facilities, as well as dining and retail attractions. Hard Rock Casino Kansas Speedway Casiplay Casino will be matched 100% up to £200 and you will also receive 30 extra spins! 0. 18+, T&C Apply,, New Customers Only. Free Spins. Prize pool: 100% up to $250. 32. Wintika Casino - Weekly Bonus No Deposit Bonus Frequently Asked Questions. Games Roulette Blackjack Live Casino. Read our full review. Wager. 30x. 353. Read our full review. Wager. Bonus Citing the struggling economy, the developer of the Hard Rock Casino & Hotel at Kansas Speedway withdrew its application for the project because it needs the option to phase in construction of the If you’re wondering what its name means, it’s simple. N1 Casino considers itself the ‘Number 1’ online gaming Hard Rock Casino Kansas City platform, and while that’s all fine and dandy, we think we’ll let […]. Read more Win Loss Statement Hard Rock Atlantic City. Fill out, securely sign, print or email your hard rock casino win loss form instantly with SignNow. The most secure digital platform to get legally binding, electronically signed documents in just a few seconds. Available for PC, iOS and Android. Start a free trial now to save yourself time and money! Explore your wild side with a trip to the casino or a stay in one of the room and suites at Hard Rock Hotels around the world. Everyday we update our Hard Rock Casino Kansas Speedway campaign offers with new no deposit casino bonus offers. Look through our list below and check our Hard Rock Casino Kansas Speedway campaigns page to find bonuses and free spins. Your Password was changed successfully Prize pool: free spins. WilliamHill . Read our full review. Latvia. Fast Payouts; 24/7 Live Support; Mobile Ready; Read Jim Allen, CEO of Hard Rock International, waits to speak during an employee meeting at the Hard Rock casino in Atlantic City, N.J. on Jan. 16, 2020 at which the company handed out bonuses Live inside the moment at a Hard Rock Hotel, Resort or All-Inclusive experience, where classic memorabilia sets the stage for a one-of-a-kind experience. Feel your heart pound to the beat of our live music at Hard Rock Live entertainment venues. Catch your breath as you bet it all on one more toss of the dice at Hard Rock Casino. Plan your next vacation getaway with Hard Rock in mind and use our convenient map to discover new and exciting cafe, casino, and hotel locations to visit worldwide.
Thanks for Watching The Casino Wanted To ARREST ME After WINNING THIS JACKPOT! ! Like the video? Thumbs it up! Love the video? Leave a comment! Can't get eno... Shooting Star My name is Brian Christopher, and every day, I post new daily videos of myself playing slot machines in the casino. You'll see some wins, some losses, some jackpot handpays, high limit slots, max ... Steve Walsh's final performance with the band Kansas. Official audio for “Carry On Wayward Son” by KansasListen to Kansas: https://Kansas.lnk.to/listenYDWatch more videos by Kansas: https://Kansas.lnk.to/listenY... Kansas performing "Belexes" and the instrumental portion of Lightning's Hand" at the Hard Rock Casino in Biloxi, Mississippi on March 11, 2017. It was an ex... Kansas performing "Carry On Wayward Son" from the album "Leftoverture" at the Hard Rock Casino in Biloxi, Mississippi on March 11, 2017. It was an excellent ... 10 Secrets Casinos Don't Want You to Know. Subscribe for more amazing videos! http://bit.ly/Subscribe-to-Richest Casinos are multi-million dollar business...
